May The Farce Be With You

In which a sally (supposedly) from the Philippines is met by a brilliant riposte from... Luke Skywalker!



My name is CEDIA D.ESTRADA,the wife of Mr.JOSEPH ESTRADA,the former President of Philippine located in the South East Asia [in case you didn't know where it is].

My husband was recently impeached from office by a backed uprising of mass demostratators and the Senate. My husband is presently in jail and facing trial on charges of corruption, embezzlement, and the more serious charge of plunder which might lead to death sentence. The present government is forcing my husband out of manila to avoid demostration by his supporters.

During my husband's regime as president of Philippine, I realized some reasonable amount of money from various deals that I succesfully executed. I have plans to invest this money for my children's future on real estate and industrial production. My husband is not aware of this because I wish to do it secretly for now.

before my husband was impeached, I secretly siphoned the sum of $27,587,680 million USD (Twenty-seven million, five hundred and eighty-seven thousand, six hundred and eighty United states dollars) out of Philipine and deposited the money with a security firm that transports valuable goods and consignments through diplomatic means. I also decleared that the consignment was solid gold and my foreign business partner owned it.

I am contacting you because I want you to go to the security company and claim the money on my behalf since I have decleared that the consignment belong to my foreign business partner. You shall also be required to assist me in investment in your country.

I trust you as a God fearing person who will not sit on this money when you claim it, rather assist me properly I expect you to decleare what percentage of the total money you will take for your assistance. when I receive your positve response I shall refer you to my attorney who is presently with all the deposit documents and he shall send them to you to enable you proceed to the security company and claim the money. I shall also let you know where the security company is and the payment pin code to claim the money which is very important.

For now, let all our communication be by e-mail because my line are right now connected to the Philipine Telecomunication Network services. Please also send me your telephone and fax number.

I will give more details when I receive your reply.

Thank you and God bless you and family.


The Kindly Contributor answers:

Oh Degobah, how good to hear from you!

I'm Luke Skywalker, the only surviving son of Darth Vader. My father was fighting for the good side a long time ago, then he was lured into the ways of the evil empire. My cause is almost lost. Now my sister - Princess Leia - too has been captured by the Emperor. I have raised a sum of 10.987.209.180 (ten billion, nine hundred and eighty seven million, two hundred and nine thousand ,one hundred and eighty) credits to be able to bribe the Emperor to get my beloved sister back. Somehow I feel the force is strong with you and can therefore trust you. Please stay in contact with me, but only over the hyperspace radio.

You are my only hope.

Best regards,
Mr. Skywalker, Jedi Knight