HELP US HELP YOU


RayNaz returns as Mark E. De Sade! Naz has been previously seen in THE LOAN RANGER COME ON, FEEL THE ILLINOISE!, LIGHTS, KAMARA, ACTION, THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON 419, and many other adventures. Naz appears courtesy of Scambaiters Equity.

Cast, in order of appearance:

BENJAMIN ABUBAKA, Personal-Sec'y-lad, who immediately morphs into...
DR. (SIR) LAWRENCE AMADI, Investigator-Lad, who is in charge, but also seems to be his own "personal secretary"
versus
MARK E. DeSADE, our hero
HARALD O. SENS, (geezer-friend), a potential scammee, mentioned only in passing
CHUKWU FARLEIGH, a Naz creation who takes on life from an unexpected source

Shall we begin? Ladies and gentlemen, please turn off all pagers and cell-phones...


Mr Benjamin Abubaka

[Ah, what is so fair as a day in June, and here is a new scam, one I haven't seen before...]

Date: Fri, 30 May 2008
Received: from User ([82.128.7.165]) <--- dialup, Multilinks Telecommunications, Lagos
Reply-To: <investigationdepart.efccng@live.com>
From: "Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi"<drwuodu_2000@yahoo.com>

Subject: NAMES OF LEGIT LOAN LENDER,S IN NIGERIAN

Mr Ben Abubaka
EFCC Chairman.
A Awolowo Road, Ikoyi, Lagos

ATTN:

We understand that you are checking out several loan offers made on the internet from our verifications on the internet because this is the Economic and financial crimes commission of Nigeria and we are commissioned in Nigeria to fight against crime and fraud on the internet.

We have made surveys and from report gathered from our investigations, we found out that 30% of fraud in the world is from our Country, Nigeria [unlikely, no matter how you measure it] and this is sad however and we have taken it upon our self not to rest until people that bring disrepute to our country is brought to book and from our investigations, internet fraud is the most frequent among this fraudulent activities and so we decided to scan entirely through the internet to search for those in need of help who may become victims if not properly informed and thus notify people on the activities going on today.

You are to note that they come either by selling you an item or any business transaction mostly cunning you into trying to obtain loans from them and you loose your money along the line, hence we want to notify and inform you not to hesitate to inform us if you are suspecting any fraud or there is any attempt on you so that we can investigate and we assuring you that we will get them wherever they are and bring them to book and if they have already taken your money, it will be refunded to you however for the fact that loans on the internet are about the most frequently used means of these scams, we hereby wish to notify you that here in Nigeria, we have only ten registered, licensed and government approved money lenders and their names are stated below,

NAMES OF LEGIT LOAN LENDER,S IN NIGERIAN

(1) Name: Mr Wee Of Wee Loan Company.
(2) Name: Mr Dr Tom James Of Tom Investment plc.
(3) Name: Mr Comson Duke Financial Loan Firm.
(4) Name: Mrs Erica financial Loan Company.
(5) Name:Mrs Tessy Luke Of Tessy Trust Lender.
(6) Name: Mr Kasima of kasolo Loan Incorporated.
(7) Name: Mrs Chen Lee Of Chen Lee Financial Homes.
(8) Name: Mr Chai Chun Of Chai Chun Loans.
(9) Name: Mr Smith White Of Smith White Loans.
(10)Weng Funlee & Kung Lue Fee association Of Weng & co Loan Company.

[scam-o-note: Of course most government "approved" money lenders in Nigeria have Chinese and Anglo names. ]

We hereby wish to warn and advice that the above listed names are the names of the registered, licensed and government approved money lenders here in Nigeria and any other outside these above names are all scams and if you do hear from any one else outside the above listed names of registered, licensed and government approved money lenders, do not hesitate to inform us.

Yours In Service,
Mr Benjamin Abubaka

[ 1. This is a variant of the LOAN scam, with a dollop of ANTI-FRAUD FRAUD.
2. Neither Mr. B.A. nor the ensuing Dr. L. A. are the head of the EFCC. If you receive a '419' mail from Mrs. Farida Waziri (who is currently the head of the EFCC), it's not really her either.
But you knew that. ]

Mark E. deSade

[Have to reply, see what's what... ]

Dear Sir:

I have received your mail, and the content is noted.

I have not been approached by any potential lenders, but should this occur, I will be certain to check the name and business to see if they are on your list of approved lenders.

I have not conducted any business with a Nigerian bank, so I do not know how you have my email address, but I appreciate the heads-up.

Thanks for the information.

Yours, Mark E. deSade
Mark E. deSade

[And who's who... ]

I just replied to your mail, and I wonder who is in charge? The mail seems to be sent by Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi, but is signed by Mr. Benjamin Abubaka.

I am curious, is Abubaka your secretary?

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
X-Originating-IP: [82.128.6.128]
Date: Fri, 6 Jun 2008

Attn: Mark E. DeSade,
I am in receipt of your mail Date: Wed, 4 Jun 2008
You are correct I am Mr. Lawrence Amadi the EFCC Chairman and Mr. Benjamin Abubakar is my personal secretary.

We need the entire related information of your previous communications with the hoodlums so as to enable us track them down. Therefore, I will appreciate you forward all the requirements so as to enable us consult proper investigation and trace the hideout of the fraudsters.

I Mr. Lawrence Amadi assurances remains that every $ you may have spent in your encounter dealing with the hoodlums will be refunded and also the fund you may have been pursing for years will be release upon verified.

Anticipating your sincere corporation.

Yours-in-Service,
Mr. Lawrence Amadi
EFCC Chairman
Mark E. deSade
To Lawrence Amadi,

I almost got fired yesterday, I answered your mail from the other e-mail account. This one is more secure, so we should use this one. Is that OK?

I sure wish you can 'refund every $ I spent', I did try to do a deal with some con-man in Nigeria some 3 years ago, he said his name is Chukwu Farleigh, and he said he's a refugee from some war-torn place in Sierra Leone.

[Chukwu Farleigh is a Naz creation, first seen in PEARLS BEFORE SWINE - but as you will see, his imaginary state doesn't hold him back!]

The deal cost me a few thousand dollars, and my wife nearly killed me when she found out that it was gone!! This Farleigh rat was one of those 419 scammers, he tempted me with some money that he even showed me a picture of stacks of hundreds of dollars in a big metal box, so I thought the deal was legit. Something about a petroleum account that was over-invoiced, he said. It sounded so real, and he had official documents, signed and stamped by the government,

If you can help me, it would sure make it right with my wife. Believe it or not, she's still furious, and she harps on it every time I do something "wrong" (in her opinion) like stop for a cold one with my friends after work. If she wasn't such a great cook, I'd throw her out.

Sorry to rant about this, but you have no idea what she's like!

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
X-Originating-IP: [82.128.22.56]
Date: Tue, 10 Jun 2008

Attn: Mark E. DeSade,
THIS IS TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR DULLY NOTED EMAIL.

AT THIS JUNCTURE WE HAVE TO APPLY FOR THE SERVICE OF A LAWYER WHO IS CAN SOLICIT ON YOUR BEHALF IF ONLY YOU CAN PROVIDE THE CONTACT INFORMATION OF THE HOODLUMS. BECAUSE IN ORDER TO ACHIEVE SUCESS IN THIS PLAN WE MUST CHARGE THEM TO COURT WHEN ARRESTED FOR ILLEGAL/FRAUDULENT ACTS. I PROMISE YOU WITH THIS EVERY $ YOU SPENT ON THE PROCESS WOULD BE SURE OF REFUND.

I EXPECT YOUR URGENT RESPOND.

Yours-in-Service,
DR. LAWRENCE AMADI
EFCC CHAIRMAN
Mark E. deSade

[I wait two weeks, then send this... ]

Sir:

Why haven't you replied to my last mail? Are you in the process of finding this Farleigh scammer? I have been looking for all the records of the money I sent to that crook, and here is what I have:

Chukwu Farleigh
181-R Paté de Fois Gras
Idi Amin Road, Sontor township,
Sierra Leone

First, he said money was needed for documents, $1,680 which I sent in September (15th) of 2005.

Then it was money for attorney, $1,000 for legal fees, which I sent in October (9th)

Then I had to send money to bribe some government officials, to the tune of $1,250. I sent that in late November.

By January, he said the demurrage fees were up over $2,500, and I would have to pay those, too. By this time, my wife was really getting mad at me for sending all that money, but I was supposed to get my share of over 17.4 million dollars, which came to 40% so almost $7 million bucks! I figured it was worth the money to assure this deal, but Farleigh just took my money and disappeared.

I don't have the means to come to Africa and hunt this guy down, and I would probably have to hire men to find him, so that would be more money spent. Here in U.S.A, we call that "Throwing good money after bad!" so if you are looking for this Chukwu Farleigh, I'm sending all of the info I have.

I hope this helps you get my money.

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
X-Originating-IP: [212.100.250.230] <-- Rackspace Hosting, RSPC-UK-TurboDial-Ltd

Date: Fri, 27 Jun 2008

Sir,
Could you please provide a telephone number that you can be reach on should in case of emergency.
Thank you for your corporation.
EFCC Chairman
Mark E. deSade
Monday, 29th

Sir:
I can give you my message-phone number, it is 2024355031. I am so seldom near my home phone, and besides, I don't want to take the chance that my wife will answer, then she'll really make my life miserable! My cell phone is not working. so I will have to buy another I suppose, but I can't seem to find the time.

Best to use the answer-machine number, then I can hear your message when I have a few free moments.

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade.

[The number I always send is to the U.S. Government Anti-Fraud line. Scammers always call it. ;o) ]

Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
Originating-IP: [212.100.250.218]
Date: Tue, 1 Jul 2008

Attention: Mr. Mark E. DeSade,

After several attempt to reach you by phone, I deemed it necessary and urgent to notify you finally that one of scam artist has been caught, he will be charge to court on Monday he definitely face the consequences.

We are in-conjunction with the West Africa Financial Crime Commission (WAFCC). Our commission was setup to eliminate Internet fraudulent activities within Africa continents; so far we helped several foreigners to recover their lost fund from the culprits.

Recently one of the big Nigeria 419 Scammer was caught, on the area of his operation we recovered some contact information, which includes yours. After several interrogations we realize that maybe he was one of the hoodlums you stated in your previous email.

If really you are among those that he agreed to have exhausted money from, kindly contact us so that the Authority in charge will file application to Federal Government of Nigeria for immediate refunding of you money.

Contact our legal practitioner on the below contact for more directives.

Name: Barrister Karl Jansen Esq
Tel: +234 805 170 9387 Ext: 123
E-mail: kjassociates.lawchambers@lawyer.com

Yours at Service,
EFCC Chairman

[If "Barrister" Jansen is actually a separate person, he will get a 'sharing percentage' of any loot extracted from a victim.]

Mark E. deSade

[We don't care for the Lad's tactic...]

Sir:

I gave you my message phone number because you said in your mail that in case of emergency, you could notify me. I had no idea that you were going to call and call many times! I only check that number to get messages sent to me, then I call the person back. Did you even leave a message? I didn't think so!!

If you try and try to reach me at the number I provided, it will be a waste of your time, I am not sitting by that phone, waiting for you to call me.

This ignorance on your part, not even knowing what a message phone number is, makes me wonder if you are a chairman of anything, much less some "EFCC".

You said that:

"...he was one of the hoodlums you stated in your previous email..."

This is incorrect, I only gave you one name, Chukwu Farleigh. Did you catch him? Did he confess? Are you going to recover my $5,330.00, or has this Farleigh spent it all?

Get back to me with answers, man. Don't try to reach me on that number I gave you, unless it's just to leave your message.

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi

[Happy 4th of July! I've got mail...]

X-Originating-IP: [212.100.250.230]
Date: Fri, 4 Jul 2008

Dear Mar E DeSade,

I told you from the information we recovered from him, your name and email address was included.

Meanwhile, I want you to understand that these hoodlums cannot use they real identity. So that name is definitely not his real name.

I told you I order my Secretary to call you not myself.

Thank you,
EFCC Chairman
Mark E. deSade
To Chairman:

I hesitate to address you as "Dear", since we have not met formally. I have read your mail, and the content is noted.

You write:

"...I told you from the information we recovered from him, your name and email address was included. Meanwhile, I want you to understand that these hoodlums cannot use they real identity. So that name is definitely not his real name..."

So, Amadi, you did catch this Chukwu Farleigh character? What is his true name? Did you manage to find out if he still has my money, or did he spend it all on trinkets and drinking and whores?

[('naz note: "TRINKETS AND DRINKING AND WHORES, OH MY!" sounds like a ditty from an old movie... ;o) ...I digress... ]

Then you say:

"...I told you I order my Secretary to call you not myself..."

Well, I do not remember you telling me any such thing. I do recall that you said Abubaka was your personal secretary, but you distinctly stated that you tried several times to call me without success. Do you remember that I told you very clearly that the number I gave was to a MESSAGE PHONE?

This is a long holiday weekend, so I will be away until Monday. Please, contact me on Monday, 7thJuly, with answers to these questions.

Thanks for you time, Mark E. deSade

P.S. When will I get my $5,330.00? Have you got any time frame on this?
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
X-Originating-IP: [212.100.250.218]
Date: Mon, 7 Jul 2008

Attn: Mark E. DeSade,

I am in receipt of your mail.

Be informed that we have gathered the entire information we needed to nail the offender. Anyway, I just want to inform you that the Federal Government of Nigeria have decided to refund every victims upon enough evidence.

Therefore, you have to get in touch with our lawyer to enable him advice you further on the steps to follow.

Meanwhile, an affidavit may be required to ascertain the legitimacy of your claim before any money can ne refund to you. Endeavour to contact him for guidelines.

Thank you,

Yours-in-Service
Lawrence Amadi
EFCC Chairman
Mark E. deSade
Lawrence Amadi:

You gave me the name of some "Legal Practitioner".

In your country, is a legal practitioner a lawyer? Here, a 'legal practitioner' is just an associate or legal aide, not necessarily a full-fledged lawyer, who has actually passed the bar, and can legally practice law.

Should I have my attorney, David V. Yates, of Yates, Erskine, and Panzupp contact this guy, or do you want him to wait for a real lawyer's name?

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Mark E. deSade

[Adding a little spice to the mix, I send this on Tuesday, 15 July...]

[Excellent, the competing scammer technique!]

Amadi:

A friend of mine, Harald Sens, got a mail from this "William Givens" and since he's not as experienced in business as I am, he asked me what I thought of it.

[See earlier Naz exploit, THE LOAN RANGER.]

Harald is really hurting for money, and could use a low-interest loan, so he's very anxious to do business with this Givens, if I think he should. This name was not on the list you sent me, but I wonder if you know anything about this "Givens Loans Affairs Inc." I was curious about this Nigerian telephone number, so I thought of you right away.

I don't want to take up too much of your time, but can you help me figure this out for my old friend, Harald?

Thank you for your time, Mark E. deSade

[So I send him a copy of a "document" I got from another Lad, to another baiter, (one "Harald O. Sens", currently embroiled in a scam of his own) just to see if he will bite at it...]

"...Hello ,

I want you to know that you can be sent this loan if all all status meet our Modus Operandi. I am Mr Williams Givens , i am a private money lender, i operate a registered and government approved financial institute. I give out loans to companies and individuals for just 3% interest rate. I give out local and international loans to any body in dire need of a loan, and that is willing to repay the loan, all over the world. I give out loans via account transfer or bank certified check to what ever country you are. I am not a bank and i do not require much documents. If you are interested in getting a loan from my company, contact me with the following details.

Below are the requirement for the LOAN APPLICATION FORM.

Williams Givens Loans Affairs Inc

* Applicant Full Names:..................................................
* Applicant Contact Address:.....................................................
* Phone No:....................................................
. * Country:....................................................
. *Gender...........................................
* Age:.....................................................
* Marital Status:.....................................................
* Amount Required As Loan:.....................................................
*Proposed Terms/Duration Of Loan:.....................................................
*Currency of needed loan...................................................................
*Annual Income:.....................................................
*Occupation in the last two years:....................................................

Note....this information will be used to fill your application form whice shall be sent down to you for signatary, EXCEPT!

MODE OF PAYMENT

You are to choose a mode which you prefer the loan to be sent to you.Below are two option
***********************************
* Payment by bank to bank transfer
* Payment by bank certified check(courier)
************************************

OFFICE USE ONLY

Verified by:________________
Confirmed by: ________________
LOAN AGENT 'S SIGNATURE:________________

All replies should be forwarded to williams_givens07@hotmail.com
Mr.Williams Givens
C.E.O.Williams Givens Loans Affairs Inc. AND Givens Home of FOREX & TRADE
+23480-7051-4836..."

Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi

[(He didn't.) A week later, I get...]

X-Originating-IP: [83.138.172.72] <-- Rackspace, UK (RSPC-UK-Net2Roam-Ltd)
Date: Wed, 23 Jul 2008
Subject: RE: NEED A LOAN? GET ONE!

Mark,

Listen, I have earlier listed out the legit Loan Lenders approved by Federal Govt of Nigeria. So whatever communication you are making outside the above-mentioned companies is at your own risk.

If you need a finance company in Nigeria I can help introduce you to one, but ONLY on a condition that all legal obligations must be observed. The chioce are yours.

Thank You,

Law Amadi
Mark E. deSade
Mr. Amadi,

I did not receive this document! Didn't you read your mail? I specifically said that a friend of mine received it!!! I only asked you if you knew anything about this GIVENS person, as long as his location appears to be Nigeria, you would be the logical person to know if he was a legit loan company or not.

I'm not shopping for a loan, you're the one who wrote to ME, telling me you could recover the money that was scammed from me by that crook, Chukwu Farleigh! You seem to have forgot that! Pay attention, Amadi!

Now, a week later, you write and tell me that

"...So whatever communication you are making outside the above-mentioned companies is at your own risk..."

Can you help me or not? I really would like to know, my wife is really making my life miserable about that money. We were going to use that money for our vacation, but now I have to continue working.

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade

[By 5 Aug, I wonder what happened to him? Maybe he figured out what 'Chukwu Farleigh' means...;o) ]

Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi

[I thought this was over, but apparently the Lad hasn't figured out anything, and is still in it...]

X-Originating-IP: [195.225.62.194] <-- Ariave Satcom, Israel [satellite telecom companies bring internet connectivity to many locations underserved by 'wired' carriers]
Date: Tue, 5 Aug 2008
From: INVESTIGATION/CONSULTATION DEPARTMENT ECONOMIC AND FINANCIAL CRIMES
Subject: MY ADVICE

If you need a loan simply provides the application fee and I will get you finance company that can sponsor whatever business you are doing. Like I said earlier, do not communication with any finance company who claimed the approval of the federal government of Nigeria without the consent of my office.
Mark E. deSade

[This simply MUST be addressed immediately...]

What is this?

"...If you need a loan simply provides the application fee and I will get you finance company..."

What "application fee" are you talking about? You clearly wrote two weeks ago, that if I needed a loan:

"...I can help introduce you to one, but ONLY on a condition that all legal obligations must be observed..."

You were going to get my money back from Chukwu Farleigh! What's going on with that? Was Farleigh arrested, and will I get my money back? My wife is really steamed about this, and she is making me sleep in the other bedroom!

I don't need a loan! my friend Harald got a letter from some guy who wanted to lend HIM money, not me.

You better get back on track, man, I'm beginning to think you don't know what you are supposed to do!

Thanks for you time, Mark

[Thursday brings another surprise! My imaginary/non-existant /made-up-by-me (who else would do such a thing, invent a guy named Chukwu Farleigh?) scammer-Lad has a "real" name--uh huh, uh huh...]

Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi
X-Originating-IP: [62.173.48.20] <-- ipNX Nigeria Limited
Date: Thu, 7 Aug 2008
From: INVESTIGATION/CONSULTATION DEPARTMENT ECONOMIC AND FINANCIAL CRIMES
COMMISSION EFCC <investigationdepart.efccng@live.com>

Sir,

I received your mail and wish to clarify that I was only making a suggestion. If you or friend needs a loan I will advice you stick to this direction. The legal obligations I stated earlier are the provision of your contact information, application fee which is necessary for every loan seeker as well as your home address to enable the company contact you for verifications.

Regarding Chukwu Farleigh whose original name is Mr. Daniel Okoko was arrested and taken to court. But the Federal High Court has refused to attend to the case due to lack of evidence. Secondly, your attention is highly needed or in alternative you canappoint a lawyer to represent you before the court according to the instruction from Chief Judge of Ikeja devision.

I would advice you appoint someone to represent you at the court on that can the Chief Judge attend to your file. NOTE: Without putting things in place there's every possibility that the court will free the accused person.

I shall await your earliest mail.

Thank you,
EFCC Chairman
Mark E. deSade

[Wait several days, then send this...]

Chairman Amadi,

I can't tell you how pleased that I was, to read that Chukwu Farleigh, who you say has the true name Daniel Okoko, was arrested, and is waiting trial.

I decided to ask my personal attorney, Michael Hadaver, to go to the court in Ikeja division, but I had to wait until he returned from his sabbatical, and then he had several appointments scheduled before he could see me.

Good News! He is able to represent my interest in your court system! He will travel to Nigeria tomorrow to see the Chief Judge. He will contact you with the telephone number you gave me, and perhaps you will be kind enough to accompany him to the court.

I will be off this computer for several days, returning on the 22nd of August. perhaps you will write again to let me know how everything proceeded with Mike and the court?

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade
Dr. (Sir) Lawrence Amadi

[The Chairman replies, short, and to the point...]

X-Originating-IP: [82.128.33.87]
Date: Fri, 22 Aug 2008

I am still waiting for your lawyer (Mike) to call me regarding your last email and have not h from had any call or email from him.
Mark E. deSade

[Oh, no.... On 22 August, I share some tragic news...]

Hello, Amadi,

With a sad and heavy heart, I must tell you that I just found out about the unfortunate and untimely death of Mike Hadaver, my childhood friend, who has been my attorney for 25 years! He was killed in that awful plane-crash in Madrid last week, I understand there were no survivors.

We were not informed of his death immediately after the crash, as he was traveling under one of his several aliases, and the body had to be identified through the forensic services of the CIA. It took until late last evening, to get the results and verification.

I will find out if one of his partners can take over this matter, and we can settle it forthwith.

Thanks for your time, Mark E. deSade

[Sorry to use that horrible plane-crash in Madrid, but it gives me a convenient avenue to introduce our favorite "Lawyer-to-the-Stars", the one and only Hugh Jardon, of Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe...]

***More to come? Stay tuned...

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