Why I Am Troletting All This Sheet

Updated september 10 2006

Lewd Noogie returns!

I STILL maintain that this is a classic, the stuff of Pullitzer Prizes!! 8 months in the making and still going!! High finance, humor, tragedy, it's got everything!! And no zen master ever put the care or patience into the nurturing of an exquisite bonsai that I have devoted to this scam!!

I should caution you - both Stephen King and Tom Clancy have approached me, begging me to let them use this as a basis for their next blockbuster novels, but as usual I'm giving you first right of refusal.

Felix Dunga - Son of Deceased (Possibly Murdered) Business Magnet,
and then:
Peter Dunga - The Reincarnation of Felix as His Younger Brother
Paul Petters - A Bank Guy,
Johnson Boora - Diplomatic Courier
Anet Graham - Lady with the Belgian Security Company
Barrister Kola Martins - Felix's Attorney

Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie - International Hotel Consultant

Lewd is out to save a lad of Cote d'Ivoire, and finds the son he always had, but never wanted (or something like that). Hard to follow the money trail...


Felix Dunga

Fri, 09 Sep 2005

From: "felix_dunga" felix_dunga@terra.com.mx
To: "felix_dunga" felix_dunga@terra.com.mx
Subject: CAN YOU BE HONEST?
Date: Mon, 5 Sep 2005 08:37:27 -0500

MIME-Version: 1.0 >X-Sender: 196.201.74.239
Received: from xnmsrelay1.terra.com ([66.231.227.68])

FROM:FELIX DUNGA
Abidjan,Republic of Cote d'ivoire.

GOOD DAY

Good a thing to write you. I have a proposal for you-this however is not mandatory nor will I in any manner compel you to honour against your will.

I am FELIX DUNGA .22years old and the only Son of my late parents Mr.and Mrs.dunga My father was a highly reputable busnness magnet-(a cocoa merchant)who operated in the capital of Ivory coast during his days. It is sad to say that he passed away mysteriously in France during one of his business trips abroad year 12th.Febuary 2003.Though his sudden death was linked or rather suspected to have been masterminded by an uncle of his who travelled with him at that time.

But God knows the truth!

My mother died when I was just 8 years old,and since then my father took me so special. Before his death on Febuary 12 2003 he called the secretary who accompanied him to the hospital and told him that he has the sum of Ten million,seven hundred thousand United State Dollars.(USD$10.700,000) left in fixed deposit account in one of the leading banks in Africa. He further told him that he deposited the money in my name,and finally issued a written instruction to his lawyer whom he said is in possession of all the necessary but legal documents to this fund and the bank.

I am just 22 years old and a university undergraduate and really don't know what to do.Now I want an account overseas where I can transfer this funds. This is because I have suffered a lot of set backs as a result of incessant political crisis here in Ivory coast.The death of my father actually brought sorrow to my life. I am in a sincere desire of your humble assistance in this regards.Your suggestions and ideas will be highly regarded.

Now permit me to ask these few questions:-
1. Can you honestly help me as your son?
2. Can I completely trust you?
3. What percentage of the total amount in question will be good for you after the money is in your account?

Please,Consider this and get back to me as soon as possible.

Thank you so much.
My sincere regards.
Felix Dunga



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

Fri, 9 Sep 2005
Mr. Dunga,

I am terribly sorry to hear of your plight but I think you have addressed this to the wrong person.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Sat, 10 Sep 2005

Dear Mr. Lewis D. Noogie ,

How are you today and you family. I want you so bear in mind that I don't have any evil plans against your person or mean to hurt you in any way. All I meant is for the goodness and betterment of our both families following your good conducts and kind assistance.

I need your acceptance to assist me to see to the transferring of this money abroad for onward investment and following your kind and heartly response I will immediately send to you the project formalities as on how we are to proceed.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga.



Lewd Noogie

September 11, 2005

Felix,

Let me ask - are you quite sure about the amount you stated (10 million dollars)? This is quite a lot of money to be handling.

I would also like to know if you have any brothers or sisters.

Sincerely,
Lewis Noogie



Felix Dunga

Mon, 12 Sep 2005

Dear Mr. Lewis Noogie,

Good day and how are you and your family. I trust that you and your family are well in the Lord. Yes, I mean everything I told you about my inheritance and the Biao bank management where my late father deposited this money re-confirmed that the sum depoited is US$ 10.7 Million. and following your positive and favourable response I will give you the bank contacts so that you can contact them for their advice on how these money will be tranferred into your account successfully without any hitches.

I am the only surviving child of my late beloved parents and none of my relations knows my way about presently because my life will be in danger if they do , because my late father before he death warned me to stay away from our relatives.

Please send me your phone and fax numbers including your bank account informations so that we can progress.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga.



[10.7 Million?? 10.7 MILLION??]

Lewd Noogie

September 13, 2005
Felix, my son,

I have looked deep into my heart and have seen the light. I cannot turn my back on you in your time of need and loss.

I should tell you a little bit about myself. I am an international hotel consultant and I am currently consulting to a small resort hotel here in the remote village of Gadyukina, Russia. I enjoy my work very much, mostly due to the interesting people I meet. Should you need to contact me the number here at the hotel is (095) 964-8597.

I am not married but I am dating a beautiful young lady who works here at the hotel, Olga, the east German massage therapist. If you do decide to come here, she has a younger sister who you might like to get to know.

We need to establish a chain of command at the very outset. I am a successful businessman and I'm sure we can solve your problem and move your money with very little effort. With your limited knowledge of these matters I need you to closely follow my advice. Do not do anything without asking me first. Do this, and we can probably have you and your money here by the middle of next month.

Now, to start things off, what kind of documentation do you have for this account? Anything you have, no matter how unimportant it seems, should be scanned and sent to me immediately. The hotel fax machine has been out of order for the past two months and the new one has not yet arrived from Murmansk so you'll have to scan and send as email attachments.

I don't want you talking to any bankers yet. It has been my experience that most bankers, as well as lawyers, are shameless thieves. We'll contact them when we need them.

I look forward to hearing from you again. By the way, my friends call me Lewd (short for Lewis D.), but you can call me................. Dad.

Dad



Felix Dunga

Tue, 13 Sep 2005

My dear Lewd,

How are you today and your family. I received your message and I thank you so much for your kind assistance towards helping me to transfer and invest my money in your country Russia. I don't know what you actually mean by shameles thieves but all , I know is that you have to meet the banking procedures to enable them carry out their duties more effectivelly.

I will be sending you a copy of the funds deposit receipt for your record purposes and more proofs. I will also try to call you by later today or tomorrow with the number as you indicated in your last email message. I will send the documents through email attachment as you adviced.

Yours sincerely.
Felix Dunga.



Lewd Noogie

September 14, 2005

Felix,

After I've seen the documentation I'll let you know what you need to do next.

So tell me a little about yourself. You never told me whether or not you have any brothers or sisters; do you? How do you spend your time? Probably like most tykes your age, chasing girls, right?

I look forward to hearing from you again.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 14 Sep 2005

My dear Lewd,

How are you today, I am very glad to read your message and I thank you so much for all your efforts and concern towards my welfare. I am the only living issue of my late beloved parents. I know what you are talking about concerning my way of living , all I know is that I spent most of my time with the pastor at our church praying together and seeking spiritual advice for you must know that I came from a very reputable family and my late parents always tought me about God and christianity.

See your attachment for the Deposit Receipt and please keep it for your record purposes and your eyes only.

Send your banking details so that I can submit it to the Biao bank for them to commence with the funds transfer procedures.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga



Lewd Noogie

September 15, 2005

Filix,

So good to hear from you.

We need to have a talk about a couple of things. First things first.

Felix, you're 22 years old, right? I am somewhat distressed to hear that a boy your age spends all his time with his pastor praying and seeking spiritual advice. This is WRONG, my son. A kid your age needs to be out chasing the girls, partying a little, enjoying his youth while he still has it. If you should decide to come here to live under my care, I don't want you hanging around some church all the time, I want you out raising hell, getting your girlfriend in trouble, that sort of thing.

I think I have just the cure for you. I thnk I mentioned that I date a woman who works here at the hotel as a massage therapist. Her name is Olga, she's an Anna Kornikova look-alike except for being six inches shorter and 200 lbs heavier. She has a younger sister named Oxnard who just happens to be single. Oxnard is a bit stockier than Olga but she's big-boned and carries it well. You two would probably hit it off great, assuming you don't have any kind of heart condition and can't handle heavy excercise. We'll talk about this some more later.

I received the scanned copy of the deposit certificate and it looks like we have a problem on our hands. You told me in your first letter that your father deposited the money to an account in your name, right? I don't see your name anywhere on the document. In fact, the only name on the certificate is 'Michael Dunga'. Please send me the documentation on this account showing that it's in your name.

Please get back to me on this as quickly as possible.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Thu, 15 Sep 2005
Dear Lewd,

I received your message and I must thank you so far for your concern and efforts. Please I want you to know that I don't have any interest in so called girl friends all I need in my life is get a life and settle down as a man. You should known that I came from a decent family. The money is depsited in my late father's name and not mine , I am only standing as the nexk of kin, while you are the beneficiary. So do send your bank account informations so that we can proceed more further.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga



Lewd Noogie

September 18, 2005
Felix,

I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you but I wanted to take the weekend to think about this.

I'm afraid that I'm going to have to excuse myself from this transaction and I want to be absolutely honest with you about my reasons for doing so.

Felix, if you came here to live I don't think you and I would get along very well. No offense, but I can't be having a kid your age sitting around the house praying all the time. It would take about 15 minutes of that for me to be bouncing off the walls. Like I told you before, it ain't normal for a young guy like you to be hanging out with pastors and meditating and praying all day. No, you should be out laying siege to every girl in the neighborhood, wrecking your car once in awhile, getting drunk, getting in fights, stuff like that. That's what normal, well-adjusted kids do.

You said you wanted to find yourself as a man, but you appear to be chemically free of interest towards women. How you gonna become a man without women, and lots of them? Olga's younger sister Oxnard could have got you started off on the right foot. That girl is 275 pound of uninhibited lust and she was very excited when I told her there was every chance you would be coming here.

I'm really sorry to have to tell you this because I think I could have helped you get this transaction finished quickly. I realize we're talking about a lot of money here but my main reason for getting involved was to help a young kid get a proper start in life, which you don't seem to want.

I'm sure you can easily find someone else to help you with this. By all means, stay in touch and let me know how you're doing.

Take care,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sun, 18 Sep 2005
Subject: OK I AM AGREED WITH YOU /URGENTS PLEASE

DEAR UNCLE LEWIS

THANKS YOU SO MUCH FOR EXPLANING UP YOUR UP YOUR REASING TOWARD MY WAY OF LIFE, IS NOT BECAUSE OF WOMEN AFFAIRE AND PRAYER ALSO, WARRANT THE YOU NOT TO HELP ME TO TRANSFERED MY LATE FATHERS MONEY IN YOUR COUNTRY WERE THERE IS BETTER LIFE WELL SECURED FOR GOOD INVESTMENT? NOW I PROMISED YOU THAT I AM ON YOUR SIDE I WILL DO ALL YOU WANT ME TO DO IN YOUR COUNTRY ?OK SEND ME THE PHOTO PICTURE OF THE LADY YOUR TALKING ABOUT THE OlGA YOUNGER SISTER ? I FILL THAT I CAN GO WITH HER IN YOUR COUNTRY AND AS WELL AS YOUR OWN PICTURE TOO?

PLEASE ALSO SEND ME YOUR BANKING INFORMATION IN OTHER TO LET ME SUMMITH IT TO THE BANK FIRST THING TOMMORO MONING AND INTRUCT THEM TO COMERCE THE TRANSFERED THE MONEY INTO YOUR NORMINETED ACCOUNTS IN YOUR COUNTRY

ALSO YOU SHOULD START TO LOCATE THE BUSINESS OF WHICH THE MONEY SHOULD BE INVEST? THANKS AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOONETS?

YOUR SINCERELY
FELX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

September 19, 2005
Felix,

I'm glad to see that you considered my advice and came to the only logical conclusion. It shows me that you're a bright lad, able to think on his feet. Trust Uncle Lewd to show you the TRUE path.

That said, I talked to Oxnard, told her that it looks like you'll be joining us after all, and she is ecstatic! I've never seen her this excited about anything before! I'll try to get a picture of her but she's a tad camera shy and I'm gonna have to figure out where I put my extreme wide-angle lens.

Ok, we're gonna take this slowly, but here's your first step - I want you to go out, buy a pack of cigarettes, and smoke 'em all. Just one pack, no more, no less. Let me know when you've done this.

Ok, let's settle down to business. Felix, let's keep in mind that until we get this money transferred that we are also business partners. I will guide us safely through this banking minefield but above all I insist on accuracy and complete honesty. The first thing I need to know is why you told me in your first letter that this account was in your name when it clearly is not. This is important so please explain this very clearly.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Mon, 19 Sep 2005
DEAR LEWD

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR CORPERATION TOWARD THIS VERY TRANSACTION AND ALSO REFYING TO YOUR QOUETION? MY LATE FATHER MICHAEL DEPOSITED THE MONEY IN THE BANK WITH HIS NAME BUT I AM THE ONLY SURVIVAL CHILD OF MY FATHER SO I AM THE NEXT OF KIN/ AND YOU IS THE BENEFICIARY OF THE MONEY AND BEFORED HIS DEATH HE LATER LATE ME KNOW ABOUNT THE MONEY IN THE BANK, OF WHICH HE DIRECT ME THAT THE MONEY WILL TRANSFERED INTO A FORIEGH ACCOUNTS IN ONE COUNTRY WERE THERE IS STABILITY OF GOVERNMENTS AND WELL SELF SECURITY AND ALSO WERE THE MONEY CAN BE INVEST FOR A VERY PROFITABLE BUSINESS ? IS JUST LIKE THE MONEY DEPOSITED ON MY BEHALF .

2 TO LATE THE TRANSFERED COMERCE SOONEST ,YOU HAVE TO SEND ALL YOUR BANKING INFORMATION IMMEDIATILY? 3 I STILL NEED THE PHOTO PICTURE OF MY LOVER AND YOU TOO NOW FOR THE FACTS I AM NOT FILLING CONFORTABLE BECAUSE OF THIS TRANSACTION, WERE AM LIVING I AM NOT BETTER? PLEASE DO AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO THAT THIS VERY TRANSFERD WILL END UP THIS WEEK

THANK AND REMAIN BLEESED IN THE LORD/ALSO HOPPING TO HEAR FROM YOU SOONEST?

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

September 20, 2005
Felix,

I appreciate your sense of urgency in this matter but you need to learn how to slow down and relax a little. It's when you rush into thing that you make mistakes, and I don't want you to give anyone at the bank the impression that you're in a hurry. I want you to always appear casual and unrushed whenever you're talking to them, understand?

Ok, my bank account information is below. I get an alert of any activity so I'll know when the money has been transferred.

Bank Name: MultiBanka
City: Estonia Branch
Country: Latvia
Swift Code: MULTLV3Y
Benificiary: DLN Associates LLC
Account Number :100205523202

Between now and the time you get the money to my account you need to get over to the Russian embassy and start processing for a visa. I did some checking and found out the visa will only cost you about $10 or $15 if you want it the same day.

Felix, your personal welfare is as important to me, if not more so, than your money. I want full reports on your personal development. Did you do what I told you with the cigarettes? I want to be assured that your adjustment to real life is on track by the time you get here.

The next step is to go and buy a six-pack of the local beer there and drink it tonight. I know you think this is all silly but it's all part of your training and it will help lead you to a healthy, fulfilling lifestyle. Again, I want full reports.

I'm attaching a picture of myself that was taken earlier this year and I need one of you as well. I've been telling Oxnard what a healthy, fine looking young man you are and she's getting more excited by the minute, but I need a picture to convince her. I'm still trying to get her to stand still long enough to let me take a picture of her but like I said, she's a bit camera-shy. Don't worry though, I'll get one of her sooner or later.

I have to get to work. Don't forget to send me your personal development report. Do as I tell you and you're gonna love it here.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 21 Sep 2005
DEAR LEWD

HOW ARE YOU TO DAY ? WHY I HAVED NEVER HEAR FROM YOU? I THINK YOU ARE VERY SEROUS BUT I DID NOT SEE YOUR COPRETION FOR THIS VERY TRANSACTION MY FRIEND WHAT IS ALL THIS? PLEASE SEND YOUR BANKING INFORMATION SO THAT THE BANK SHOULD START THE TRANSFERD OF THE MONEY INTO YOUR ACCOUNTS? IN OTHER FOR ME TO LEAVE THIS HOUREBLE COUNRY?

THANKS AND HOPPING TO HEAR FROM YOU

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

Wed, 21 Sep 2005
Felix,

I sent you the bank information yesterday! Go back and check your email.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 21 Sep 2005
DEAR LEWD

I DONT' SEE YOUR BANKING INFORMATION? PLEASE REPEAT IT AGAIN IT IS URGENT NEED?

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Felix Dunga

Thu, 22 Sep 2005
DEAR LWED

UP TILL NOW I HAVE NEVER RESIEVED YOUR BANK INFORMATION IN MY EMAIL? WHAT IS WRONG?

FELIX



Lewd Noogie

Wed, 28 Sep 2005
Felix,

My sincere apologies for not responding sooner but I've been faced with a major problem here that must be dealt with before I can do anything else. I should have this wrapped up by next Wednesday.

Please let me know if that will be too late to resend my account information.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Thu, 29 Sep 2005
DEAR LEWD

THANKS YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR RESPONDS ? I AM JUST FILL SO CONFUSED SINCE YOU ARE UNDER THE DELAYING OF THIS VERY TRANSACTION BUT MAY GOD BE THE GLORY THAT YOU HAVED COME BACK? OK YOU CAN SEND YOUR BANK INFORMATION AS YOU SAID BUT YOU HAVED TO BE SERIOUS DOU TO THE POLITICAL CRISIS RUMOR IN THE COUNRY (COTE D'IVOIRE) PLEASE SEND THE INFORMATION WITH YOUR PHOTO INCLUDING THE GIRL YOUR TALKING ABOUNT?

THANKS AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Felix Dunga

Thu, 6 Oct 2005
DEAR LEWD

HOW ARE YOU I HOPE YOUR ALRIGHT FROM THE PROBLEM I AM SO SORRY ABOUNT THAT?

YOU HAVE TO SEND YOUR BANKING INFORMETION AS YOU SAY THIS WEEK WEDNESDAY OF CAUSE IT HAS COME UP WITH? SEND THE DETAILS SO THAT THE BANK WILL START THE TRANSFERED THE MONEY INTO YOUR NORMINETED ACCOUNTS

THIS IS VERY URGENT BECAUSE THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION OF THIS VERY COUNTRY WILL TAKES PLACE VERY SOON/ NO BODY KNOWS WHAT MAY COME OUT WITH?

THANKS AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Felix Dunga

Sun, 9 Oct 2005
DEAR LEWD

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR RESPONDS? JUST SEND THE BANK INFORMATION IS NOT TOO LATE AS YOU SAY ? THE MONEY IS IN THE BANK HERE IN ABIDJAN? TRY TO SEND YOUR BANK INFORMATION SO THAT THE BANK WILL START THE TRANSFERED OF THE MONEY IN YOUR NORMINETED ACCOUNTS? JUST HAVE A VERY GOOD DAY AND WAITING FOR YOUR INFORMATION IMMEDIATELY

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Felix Dunga

Wed, 12 Oct 2005

DAER LEWD

WHY YOU DONT WANT SEND TO ME YOUR BANK DETAIL FOR THE STATEMENT OF THE TRANSFERED THE MONEY INTO YOUR ACCOUNT? AND I HAVE ALREADY SUBMITH YOUR NAME TO THE DIRCTOR OF REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT OF THE BANK AS THE BENEFICIARY OF THE MONEY?

PLEASE YOU NEED TO HELP BY SUBMITHING YOUR BANK INFORMATION IMMEDIATELY SO THAT THE BANK WILL START THE TRANSFERE IMMEDIATELY

THANK AND EXPECTING YOUR RESPOND SOONEST

FELIX DUNGA



[Being as busy as I am assisting the EFCC I was going to let this one go but Felix is like a bulldog with a rag...]

Lewd Noogie

October 13, 2005

Felix, my son, my sincere apologies. You would not believe what I've been through these past two weeks. It's a long story and I can tell you all about it when you get here. That is, if you're still interested in coming here.

Tell me what I need to do.
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Thu, 13 Oct 2005
DEAR LEWD

THANK YOU SO MUCH OF YOUR RESPOND AND UNDERSTANDING OVER THIS VERY TRANSFERED, AND ALSO I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE PROBLEM YOUR FECING?

I AM WELL INTRESTED OF COMMING TO MEET YOU OVER THERE WITHING A SHORT TIME? NOW WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO IS TO FORWARDING YOUR BANKING DETAILS AND INFORMATION TO ME SO THAT I WILL SUMBMITH IT TO THE BANK IMMEDIATELY AND INSTRUCT THE BANK TO START THE TRANSFERED OF THE MONEY INTO YOUR ACCOUNT IN YOUR COUNTRY IMMEDIATELY?

PLEASE FORWARD THE BANK DETAILS IMMEDIETELY AND ALSO MY GREETING TO YOUR SISTER

THANK AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

October 14, 2005
Felix,

Ok, here's the bank information (again):

Bank Name: MultiBanka
City: Estonia Branch
Country: Latvia
Swift Code: MULTLV3Y
Benificiary: DLN Associates LLC
Account Number :100205523202

Let me know when they have transferred the money.

Let's talk about you coming here. First of all, have you been following the instructions I gave you earlier? Are you smoking yet? Drinking? Chasing girls? If you're not, get started. I want you in shape by the time you get here. Please give me a progress report.

Have you visited the Russian consulate to see about a visa? Don't put that off until the last minute. This money transfer shouldn't take too long so you need to jump on that visa.

I'm waiting to hear from you.
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 14 Oct 2005
Dear Lewd,

Many thanks for your response. I have received your bank account details and i am submitting the information to the bank this afternoon. I am going to introduce you to the bank as my nominated foreign partner whom i have appointed to receive my inherittance with the bank. Probably, the bank will contact you later today or latest Monday next week.

Once you hear from the bank, please, kindly getback to me with update.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Regards,
Felix.



Lewd Noogie

October 15, 2005
Felix,

I am sad to have to tell you that I don't think this is going to work out. I'll try and explain this as best I can.

Felix, you have consistently avoided discussing your personal development and I suspect that the reason is due to the fact that there has been no personal development. I don't think you're trying to change your lifestyle at all. You're probably still hanging around with that pastor all day, praying and talking about the river Jordan and stuff like that, right?

It's like I told you before, I can't bring you here and have you underfoot praying all day and having people from your bible study group in and out at all hours. The next thing you know you'd be trying to drag me into that stuff. As it says in the book of Noogie, chapter 3, verse 17, "Thou shalt enjoy your life to the maximum. Go ye therefore and debauche". If it was a matter of you leaving your empty beer cans underfoot or dragging women in and out at all hours, THAT I could live with.

Sorry, kiddo, but you need to find somebody else to help you with this. Best of luck to you.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sat, 15 Oct 2005
Subject: SIR I AM AGREED WITH YOU /DONT' WORRY

DEAR LEWD

WHAT IS THE PROBLEM NOW? I HAVE TOLD YOU THAT I AM AGREED WITH YOU SOME TIMES AGO,

NOW I CAN SMOKE VERY WELL AND ALSO I CAN DRINK ALCOHOL MUCH , EVEN TO CHASE WOMEN I AM INTRESTED VERY WELL LAST EMAIL I ASK YOU ABOUNT THAT MY LOVER GILS WHICH YOU EXPLAIN TO ME IS NOT THROUGH SO SIR I AM WELL AGREED WITH YOU THERE IS KNOW PROBLEM ABOUNT ALL YOUR DEMAND

THEREDILY I AM PROMISED YOU IF I COME DOWN IN YOUR COUNTRY I AM NOT GOING TO ATTEND ANY CHURCH SERVICE AND I AM NOT GOING TO CORPRET OR HAVE ANY RELATION WITH ANY PASTORS EVEN TO PRAY IN YOUR HOUSE I WILL NOT DO SO

DEAR SIR DONT' WORRY I WILL DO ALL YOUR WISH I AM UNDER YOUR FOOT SIR PLEASE HAVED THE BANK CONTACTED YOU, PLEASE SIR TRY TO KEEP ME ALERT

THANK AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOONEST?

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

Sat, 15 Oct 2005
Felix,

I need to explain something to you. I am a very successful businessman and money is the least of my concerns. I agreed to help you because I'm a people-person. I like helping guys your age get a good start in life. If I'm going to bring you here I want you to learn how to have fun, how to be a real man. We'll do manly things together - pub-crawling, smoke cigars, get into fights once in awhile, chase women. It's all good, clean fun. I understand this is all new to you and I want you to get some practice in before you get here. So when I ask you how your training is coming along, don't ignore me. Do this - send me a picture of you with a cigar or cigarette and holding a beer.

Then I'll know you're for real.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Mon, 17 Oct 2005
DEAR LEWD

THANK YOU FOR YOUR RESPOND? I THINK I HAVE ALREADY EXPLAIN EVERTHING TO I AM IN ALL THIS I CAN DRUNK VERY I AM INTRESTED IN WOMAN AND I CAN SMOKE VERY WELL

WELL THE TERRA BOX IS SO DEFILCULT OF ATTACHMENT SO HARD SO THE PICTURE CAN SEND TO LATER PLEASE HAVE THE BANK CONTACTED LET ME KNOW FOR THE ARRENGMENT OF MY VISA

THANK
YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

October 18, 2005
Felix,

I was up all night partying with Olga, the East German massage therapist who works here at the hotel. My head feels like a ripe watermellon this morning and my mouth feels like a small furry animal crawled in and shat in it while I was asleep. It's all part of the fun, though. By the way, Oxnard, Olga's younger sister, keeps asking me about you. I can tell that she has visions of sugarplums dancing in her head over your impending arrival.

I tell you, Felix, you are gonna love it here. If you get here, that is. I must admit that I am somewhat suspicious that you won't send the picture I asked for. Anybody can attach a picture to an email so don't tell me it's too difficult. I want to help you, Felix, but I want to be absolutely sure that you're gonna be the kind of guy I want to hang out with.

Send the picture, then we'll talk about banks and visas.

Lewd



[The bank guy finally show up, but no picture, no discussions with bankers...]

Paul Petters

Tue, 18 Oct 2005

From the desk of Dr. Paul Petters, the Remittance Depart. Director,
BIAO BANK, Abidjan - CI.
Attn: Our Valued Customers. Mr. Noogie, of Latvia

Sir,

RE: SWIFT KTT TRANSFER OF US$ 10.7 MILLION INTO THE MULTIBANKA, ESTONIA BRANCH, LATVIA. SWIFT CODE # MULTLV3Y, ACCT. N# 100205523202. BENEFICIARY: DLN ASSOCIATES LLC.

Sequel, to your official request to our Bank through your local partner here Felix Dunga concerning the transfer of your funds to your nominated account, we hereby stated the following informations and advise regarding to your request. It is our banking regulation you identify your self legally as the beneficiary of the said deposit fund under our custody for the past years.

These are our rules and regulation, that before such huge mount of money will be transferred out of cote d'Ivoire, an attorney must swear an Affidavit of Oath,legalised and notarised and normalised all documents related to the transfer, with an Approval from Ministry of Finance Cote d'Ivoire for Exchange Approval Including change of ownership, to enable us remove a clause attached by your late partner during the time of deposit.

After he/ she has fully identify himself as the bonafide beneficiary of the fund,every dealings of this transfer will be forwarded straight to the beneficiary as you are the only identity we know.

Therefore, you are advised to contact immediately our accredited attorney here in Abidjan - Ivory Coast for the legalisation of your funds transfer related documents so that we can de-block your funds and effect your transfer.

You need to contact an accredited attorney, Barrister Clifford Amoise, on this email address or phone numbers for his legal advise and assistance towards notarising, normalising and legalising of your transfer related documents.

Contact person : Barrister Clifford Amoise, Principal Attorney of the Equity Chambers.
E-mail: ( cliffordamoise@equitychambersci.com)
tel + 225 05 77 3412.

We await your prompt attention.

Management,
Dr. Paul Petters. Director Foreign Remittance Department.
BIAO - BANK, Abidjan -CI.



Felix Dunga

Thu, 20 Oct 2005
Dear Mr. Lewd,

How are you today and your family. I went to the bank management this afternoon and the operational director told me that they have already contacted you with further instructions on what you are required to do, please do let me know and get back to me.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga.



Lewd Noogie

October 19, 2005
Felix,

Yes, I heard from a Mr. Petters of Biao-Bank today. He's asking me to contact some lawyer there in Abidjan to take care of some paperwork. Just what I need in my life - a lawyer. I tell you, I have never, ever had a good experience with one of those bottom-feeding vultures. Hell, even my own lawyer is a crook. I can tell you that things are going to get complicated from here on.

I told you that I'm not helping you for the money and I meant it. I want to give a young man a good start in life, teach you how to enjoy life to it's fullest, and to live as a man's man, like myself. I have to be sure that you're really open to living my kind of lifestyle before I go to all this trouble, dicking around with bankers and lawyers. Send me the picture I asked you for with the beer and the cigar or cigarette and then we'll start dealing with these guys.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 21 Oct 2005
Dear Mr. Lewd,

How are you today and your family. I received your message and please you need to check your attachment for my picture. please do keep me informed as for your communication with the bank so that I can follow -up with the funds transfer procedures.

Yours sincerely,
Felix Dunga.



[Felix attaches a picture of a nice looking young man, but there's no booze or smokes in sight...]

Lewd Noogie

October 22, 2005
Felix,

I got your email with your photo attached. Unfortunately, it's not what I asked for. I asked for a picture of you holding a beer and a cigar or cigarette. I knew that if you could have your picture taken smoking and drinking that I could trust you to become a well-adjusted man here. But you couldn't do it, could you?

Felix, I really, really want to help you but I don't think you've changed. I don't think you CAN change. I'll bet you're still hanging around with that pastor, praying all day and talking about Babylon and stuff like that, right? Yes, I know you are.

Can't have that, son. I will tell you again - go find somebody who's beliefs and lifestyle suits your own to help you with this.

Sorry,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sun, 23 Oct 2005
DEAR LEWD

I HOPE I HAVE DO WHAT YOU WANT? I HAVED ALREADY SEND MY PICTURE TO FOR YOUR VERIFICATION AND I HAVED TOLD YOU THAT I AM TYPE OF PERSON YOU NEED SMOKING DRUNKING CHESING WOMAN OR GOING TO THE NIGHT CLUB ALL IS MY HOBIE MY FOOD I AM WELL INTRESTED IN ALL THIS TYPE OF LIFE

WHY ARE YOU BORDERING ME IN THAT WAY? AT LIST I AM THE ONE WHO CONTACTED YOU THE MONEY IS STILL IN THE BANK HERE WAITING FOR ME PICTURE OR NO PICTURE IS NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THIS VERY TRANSACTION NOW I KNOW YOU HAVED SOMBMITHED YOUR BANKING DATA KINDILY CORPRET WITH THE BANK AND INTRUCT THEM TO TRANSFERED THE MONEY INTO YOUR ACCOUNTS

FORGET ABOUNT THE PICTURE MATTER I AM THE ONE YOU WANT IF I COME OVER THERE WE CAN SHARE LIFE TOGETHER AS YOU WANTED IT TO BE HAVE YOU CONTACTED THE BANK ATTARCH ATTORNEY PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR BEST

FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

October 24, 2005
Felix,

I will tell you again, I want very much to help you and all I'm asking for is verification that you are beginning to turn your life around. A picture is worth a thousand words and your hesitancy to send me your picture is beginning to make me suspicious.

If you really want me to help you will send the picture I asked for. As soon as I receive it and see you with a beer and a cigar or cigarette, I will write to the bank and start things moving.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Tue, 25 Oct 2005
Subject: YOU FIND THE TRUTH LATER

DEAR LEWD

NOTHING CONCERN ME WITH PASTOR AND PRAYER AGAIN I AM NOT GOING TO THE PASTOR HOUSE OR ATTENDING ANY CHURCH AGAIN

I AM DOING WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO SMOKING DRINKING GOING TO THE NIGHT CLUB? BUT I CAN NOT TAKE ANY PICTURE WITH ALL THESE IF YOU STILL INTRESTED LOOK AND WATCH WHEN I WILL COME OVER THERE YOU WILL FIND THE TRUTH

NOW I AM LOOKING TO HERE FROM YOU
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

October 26, 2005
Felix,

I was surprised to hear from you - I thought you said you were going to find someone else.

Sorry, Felix, I'm not gonna wait until you get here to find out if I've made a mistake or not. I will doubt your sincerity until I receive that picture.

Send the picture and I'll help you. No picture, no help. Sorry.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 26 Oct 2005

DAER LEWD

THANK FOR THE DELAYING OF MY TIME ? NOW I WILL FIND ANOTHER SOME ONE FOR THE INVESTING OF THE FUND?

FELIX



Lewd Noogie

October 27, 2005
Felix,

Yes, I do think it's best that you find someone with beliefs closer to your own to help you with this. This is what I've been suggesting for some time now.

But I do take exception to your statement that I've been delaying your time. Asking you for a picture was a very simple request and you refused to comply. I don't think you were entirely honest with me about your change in lifestyle and I believe this is why you refused my request.

While I know that I could have helped you transfer your money very quickly. I agree with you that, under the circumstances, finding someone else is the best thing to do. I wish you luck and let me know how it turns out.

Your friend,
Lewd



[After not hearing from Felix for over a week I figured this one was finished. Just goes to show you can't be in too big a hurry to delete the ones that didn't work...]

Felix Dunga

Sat, 5 Nov 2005
DEAR LEWD

HOWE ARE YOU TO DAY I HOPE YOUR ALRIGHT PLEASE LATER I WILL SEND TO YOU THE NEW METHODE YOU WILL USED TO HAVE THE MONEY URGENTILY IN YOUR DOOR STEP

THE BANK WILL USED THROUGH DIPLOMATIC SYSTEM BY KOREA SERVICES TO CARRY OUT THE MONEY ON THE TRUNKS BOX INTO YOUR DOOR STEP IN YOUR COUNTRY RUSSIA THANK AND STAY TOON FOR THE CALL

YOUR LOVELY FRIEND
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

Sat, 5 Nov 2005
Felix, my old friend, so good to hear from you. What's this about a Korean service to move a trunk box?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Mon, 7 Nov 2005
DEAR LEWD

SORRY FOR DELAYING YOUR RESPOND I AM SO SILK AND NOT FILLING NORMAL BECAUSE OF MY PRESENT CONDITION OVER HERE IN AFRICA, DONT' WORRY TOMMOROW I WILL SEND YOU THE DETAILS OF THE TRUNK BOX AND HOWE YOU WILL RESEIVED THE TRUNK BOX IN YOUR DOOR STEP IN YOUR COUNTRY WITHOUT WASTING OF ANY TIME, AND ALSO THE ARRENGEMENT OF THE BANK BY USING DIPLOMATIC SYSTEM THROUGH KOREA SERVICE FOR HANDLING THE TRUNK BOX TO YOU?

THANK AND STAY TOON

YOURS FRIENDILY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

November 8, 2005
Felix,

I'm terribly sorry to hear of your illness. What exactly is the problem? Have you been to see a doctor?

I'm somewhat confused about Koreans and trunk boxes - first of all, are we talking NORTH or SOUTH Koreans? If it's those guys from the North you can cross my name out. And what's with the trunk box?

Write me when you're feeling better.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Tue, 8 Nov 2005

Dear Lewd,

Thank you so much for your mail and i really understands that you did not understand this system but the bank director assured me that it will be the easiest and safest way of getting this money into your country without any problem.

The director explained to me that all they need from you is your informations like your home address and your direct phone number so that it will be easy for the diplomat that will bring the money to your country to know where to meet you and he said that you should send a copy of your international passport or driving licence so that he will submit it to the diplomat as it will help him to know on his arrival to your country.

But the most important thing that the director told me is that he will not like you to allow the diplomat to know that it is money that he is carrying because he will tell the diplomat that it is important bank documents for you so incase, the diplomat asks you on arrival to your country the content of the box then you should tell him that it is BANK DOCUMENTS .

Please i await your urgent reply today and don't forget to send your informations to me so that i will go and submit it to the bank director immediately.

Best regards,
Felix Dunga



Felix Dunga

Wed, 9 Nov 2005
DEAR LEWD

HOWE ARE YOU TO DAY I FILL YOU ALL ARE ALRIGHT?WHAT EXACTILY WHAT HAPPEING THAT MAKES YOU NOT TO RESEND YOUR CONTACT INFORMATION TO ME IN OTHER TO SUMBMITH TO THE FOR CARRING OUT THE TRUNK BOX WHICH CONTAINED THE MONEY INTO YOUR DOOR STEP IN YOUR COUNTRY THROUGH THE HELP OF DIPLOMATIC SYSTEM PLEASE SEND THE INFORMAION IMMEDIATILY OR ARE YOU TRYING TO DELAING THE PROJECT THANK AND HOPPING TO HERE YOUR URGENT RESPOND YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

Wed, 9 Nov 2005
Felix, my friend, keep your shirt on. I'm not trying to delaing anything. This is the information you want:

Name: Lewis D. Noogie
Address: c/o Zayebis Hotel and Resort
Gadyukina, Kurgan Oblast,
Russian Federation
Tel: 7-095-964-8597
Fax: n/a
Email: lewd_noogie@yahoo.com

You haven't told me when this trunk box is supposed to show up. Are you still planning to come here shortly after it arrives?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 11 Nov 2005
Dear Lewd,

Thank you so much for your mail and infact i am too happy now because i have submitted the informations that you sent to the bank director this morning and he promised me that he will go and submit it to the diplomat immediately.

He told me that the diplomat will leave here by sunday night to your country and he will contact you as soon as he arrives there for you to come and meet him but he said that you should make sure that you did not tell him the content of the box for the security of the money so please NEVER you forget to keep this money well.

I will be coming to meet you as soon as you recieve the box because you will send money to me through western union and i will use the money to buy my flight ticket to come and meet you for the investing of the money.

Please keep me informed as soon as you recieve the box so that i will be start to prepare for my trip.

I await your urgent reply.
Felix Dunga



Lewd Noogie

November 11, 2005
Felix,

This diplomat arriving here on Sunday is kind of short notice but I guess I can accomodate him. Just out of curiosity, which city is he flying into and how long does he intend to be here?

Don't worry, I won't tell him what's in the box.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sat, 12 Nov 2005
Dear Lewd,

Thank you so much for your mail and i will like you to keep me informed as soon as you recieve the money so that i will be aware. On the issue of the diplomat's accomdation , i think that will be his own idea if he will like to saty in your hotel then good but if he don't like all you have to do is just to collect the box from him and settle him with his expense then you go with the box. I await your urgent reply and please make sure you co-operate with him and i don't know where the diplomat will land but all i know that he will contact you as soon as he arrives your country so that you will book where the two of you can meet for the collection.

Best regards,
Felix.



Lewd Noogie

November 13, 2005
Felix,

I don't understand why you didn't get this diplomat's itinerary. Russia is a huge country and he could be landing at any of 50 different cities. He's out there with a box full of your money, and you have no idea where he is? Felix, you do need help my friend.

Ok, I'll be in the here in the hotel all day. I'll wait for his call and let you know what happens.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

November 14, 2005
Felix,

It's Monday morning, Felix,

and no diplomat. Where is this guy?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Mon, 14 Nov 2005
Dear Lewd,

I have just contacted the bank director now and he told me that the diplomat has a problem in Madrid Spain and he said that the diplomat have been trying your phone number but the person that picks it did not speak english but i told the director that you understands english very well. The director told me that they have given your mail address to the diplomat so that he can reach you through mail so please make sure that you regulate this problem immediately so that the diplomat will arrive your country today too.

I await your urgent reply and keep me informed.

Best regards,
Felix



Johnson Boora

X-Originating-IP: [193.252.22.158]

Mon, 14 Nov 2005

From The Desk of
Dr.Johnson Boora.
Director of operation. ( FIDELITY TRUST SECURITIES & DIPLOMATIC COURIER SERV, EUROPE ZONE ).

Attn : Mr. Lewis D. Noogie.

Consignment notification

Sir,

We write to inform you that we have arrived in Madrid Spain on our transit point waiting to connect and proceed to your address : c/o zayebis hotel and resort gadykina, kurgan oblast, Russian Federation, for the deliverance of the said consignment to you as the rightfull beneficiary, as been instructed by your partner in Abidjan ( Ivory coast, Africa ).

But we are having a litle problem in connecting to your addrees by the Spianish authority at the airport, they are asking for the clearance of your consignment before we can proceed.

Hence, you are advised to contact us immediately through our contact number or by e mail, for further clearification, to enable us proceed and deliver the consignment to your address with out no further delay.

Thanks for your co-operation in the direction .

Regards,
Dr.Johnson Boora.
Tel : 679 661 425.



Lewd Noogie

November 15, 2005

Dr. Boora,

I thank you for your notification but I must confess to being somewhat confused. You have my correct contact information, and I'm not sure why the Spanish airport authority would be trying to contact me. What sort of 'clearance' are you referring to?

My partner in Abadjan tells me you will be arriving today. Please let me know your itinerary and which airport you will be flying into. I have reserved a suite for you here at the Zayebis Hotel, at my expense, and I'm sure you'll find the accomodations more than satisfactory.

Sincerly,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Tue, 15 Nov 2005

dear lewd

What is happening dont you that this is money affaier you dont need to play or joke with it, why you refused to contacts me ,the diplomat is always calling your phone number but know body is picking it ,what is all this is, is it your private phone number send the original phone number the one you send no body is picking the phone

did the diplomat send you by email please let me know

Felix



Johnson Boora

Tue, 15 Nov 2005
PLEASE CAN YOU GIVE ME YOUR DIRECT TEL NUMBER SO THAT I WILL CALL AND SPEAK WITH YOU OVER THE PHONE BECAUSE IS SOME THING THAT REQUIRE URGENT ATTENTION, OR YOU CAN CALL ME ON THIS NUMBER : 679 661 425.

PLEASE TRY AND GET BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY SO THAT WE CAN RESOLVE THIS ISSUE AND GET YOUR CONSIGNMENT TO YOUR DOOR STEP, TO ENABLE ME RETURN BACK TO MY BASE BECAUSE THE WEATHER HERE IS TOO COLD FOR ME.

MY REGARDS,
DR. JOHNSON BOORA.



Lewd Noogie

Tue, 15 Nov 2005
Felix, where did you find this nitwit diplomat? This guy is obviously one of the most incompetent people I've ever been in contact with.

He's somewhere in Madrid whining about the cold. Did you tell him that he's coming to Russia? Do you or he have any idea how freakin' cold it gets here? Spain is nothing, my friend.

He still has not told me what the problem is, where he's flying into, or when he's coming. If you're in contact with him, ask him and then one of you let me know.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

Tue, 15 Nov 2005
Mr. Boora,

I am in a hotel and I don't have a direct line - you have to go through the hotel operator to reach my office number.

What exactly is the problem? You were supposed to arrive in Russia today. You still have not told me what city you are flying into and your flight number and time. How long would it have taken to write that in your last email? And the fact that it is cold where you are is none of my concern. Mr. Boora, you have a job to do so please accomplish it without complaint. You should have brought a coat. If you think it's cold in Madrid, wait 'till you get here.

Please take a moment to explain to me what the problem is and your itinerary.

Thank you.
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Tue, 15 Nov 2005
Dear Lewd,

Thank you so much for your urgent reply and infact i have to contact the director of the bank this morning to know after writing to you and he is the one telling me that the diplomat is having problems with the customs at Madrid and he said that he have been trying your line to explain to you but to no avail and he said that this issue needs urgent intervention because the customs there in Madrid are insisting in opening the box.

Please all i want you to do now is to see that you co-operate with this diplomat because he have refused the customs to open the box because you should know what is involved if they happens to open the box and see that it is money then we will loose this money.

The director gave me the mobile number of the diplomat that he just bought because the director told me that they have instructed the diplomat not leave the consignment there and return back that he should do everything possible to see that he delievers this box to you so this is the number of the diplomat 0034679661425 and his name is Dr Johnson Borra so please i am pleading to you with my kneels on the ground to call this diplomat immediately so that you will know what to do.

I await your urgent reply and please keep me informed of your discussion with him.

Best regards, Felix



Lewd Noogie

Tue, 15 Nov 2005
Felix,

As I explained to you earlier, the hotel does not allow me to make personal calls on the hotel telephones. I don't understand what the problem is because you and this diplomat are not giving me any information.

Let me ask you again: WHAT IS THE PROBLEM??? If this guy is a diplomat, he has diplomatic immunity, right? Spanish customs can't open anything he doesn't want them to open. He just shows them his diplomatic passport and tells them to piss off. And by international law, they have to piss off. Now how difficult is that?

Felix, where did you find this guy? How do you know he's a diplomat?

I've been asking the hotel operator all day if there have been any calls for me and every time she tells me 'no'. Look, if this guy doesn't know how to use a telephone, tell him to send me an email explaining

a) what the problem with Spanish customs is,
b) what city in Russia he's flying into,
and
c) when he's arriving.

Once I have this information I can tell him what to do.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 16 Nov 2005

Dear Lewd,

I have just gone through your mail and i really understands what you said but this diplomat was introduced to me by the bank director and he told me that he has been working for them for so many years. Please i want you to try your best to call the diplomat with the number that i sent to you because you can see that the diplomat is not in Spain to waste time because the director told me that if nothing is been done then the diplomat will leave the consignment at Madrid airport and come back to resume his job.

Even if the hotel don't allow you to make use of their phone and you know what you are looking for is a big money then you should try and call the diplomat with public phone booth than wasting time because it will be too bad if the diplomat abandons the consignment there.

I await your urgent reply and please try as much as possible to see that you reach the diplomat today as to know what you can do and if it is possible i will advise you to go and meet him at Madrid for the coillection of the consignment.

Best regards,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November16, 2005
Felix,

Let me get this straight - this twit goes to Spain with all this money but without any clue as to how he's going to get out of Spain with the money? This is ponderous, just fulking ponderous. Why did he even stop in Spain to begin with? He's supposed to be hurrying his ass to Russia!

And you want me to go to Spain to meet him? If HE can't get it out, how am I supposed to get it out? You're not thinking clearly here, Felix. HE'S the freakin' DIPLOMAT, not me!

And I'll tell you one more time, there are no phone booths here in Gadyukina. This is a village in the middle of the Ural mountains. For all I know the hotel has the only phone in the area and it's a satellite feed. This is why I needed to know when and where this diplomat was coming in so I could arrange a helicopter to pick him up. I have received not one bit of information from him. I know he has access to a computer, tell him to write to me, NOW, and explain to me exactly what the problem is.

I hate to say this, Felix, but you guys have got this thing completely dicked up. All I was supposed to do was receive this money and hold it until you came here. Now look at the state thing are in.

TELL THAT DIPLOMAT TO WRITE ME!

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

November 16, 2005
Mr. Boora,

I am rapidly loosing my patience with this.

I have asked you twice now to write or call me explaining exactly what your problem is, when you arriving in Russia, and what city you flying to. You have so far refused to provide me with this information. I don't see how you can expect me to help you if I don't even know what the problem is.

I have to tell you, Mr. Boora, that both myself and my partner have been extremely disappointed with your inept performance to date. I would suggest you take immediate action to contact me either by phone or email and tell me what the hell is going on.

Please do this immediately.

Lewis D. Noogie



Johnson Boora

Wed, 16 Nov 2005

I AM BEEN STOCKED HERE IN MADRID SPAIN BY THE SPAINISH CUSTOM SAYING THAT WE MUST OBTAIN SPAINISH CUSTOM CONSIGNMENT CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE, BEFORE WE CAN PROCEED TO OUR DESTINATION. AND THEY ARE DEMANDING 2,500.00 EUROS ( TWO THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED EUROS ) AS THE OFFICIAL FEE FOR THE CERTIFICATE. STATING THAT IF WE DO NOT HAVE THE CERTIFICATE, THAT YOUR CONSIGNMENT WILL BE CONFISCATED BY THE AUTHORITY, SO I AM ADVICING YOU TO TRY TO SEE WHAT YOU CAN DO TO SEND THE REQUIRED FEE SO THAT WE CAN OBTAIN THE CERTIFICATE AND PROCEED TO OUR DESTINATION IMMEDIATELY.

AND NOTE THAT AS SOON AS WE GET THE CERTIFICATE, WE WILL BE LANDING AT THE MOSCOW INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT RUSSIA AND PROCEED TO THIS ADDRESS TO MEET WITH YOU :

Addreaa: c/o Zayebis Hotel and ResortGadyukina, Kurgan Oblast,Russian Federation.

AND IF YOU WANT TO MAKE A CHANGE ON THE ADDRESS, PLEASE DO INFORM IMMEDIATELY. SO THAT WE DON'T HAVE TO GO TO A WRONG ADDRESS. AND NOTE THAT I HAVE BEEN CALLING YOU ON THIS NUMBER SINCE ALL THIS WHILE WITH OUT NO RESPONES Tel: 7-095-964-8597, PLEASE CONFIRM.

HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON,
DR. JOHNSON BOORA.



Lewd Noogie

November 17, 2005
Mr. Boora,

I don't know why I need to tell YOU this, but you are a diplomat which means that you have DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY. You don't have to show them ANYTHING. You have a diplomatic passport, do you not? Show it to the customs guys and they can't touch you or anything you're carrying. This is how it works. This is one of the perks of being a diplomat.

Thank you for telling me which city you are flying into. I presume you are arrivng at Sheryemetyevo airport and not Domodyedevo, correct? What day will you be arriving?

YOU DO HAVE A VALID RUSSIAN VISA I TRUST?

Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Thu, 17 Nov 2005

Dear Lewd, Thank you so much for your mail and i have to rush to the bank to know what is exactly happening and on my reaching there i was told by the director that the customs at madrid airport are asking for a certificate before they could release it and the director told me that they were asking for the certificate at the cost of 2500 euros.

Please sir, you can see that we have come a long way in this transaction and now that the consignment was stopped at Madrid please i am on my kneels pleading to you to do everything possible to see that you regulate this problem so that the diplomat will bring the consignment to your home today.

I await your urgent reply and please don't forget to keep me informed as soon as you recieve the box from the diplomat.

Best regards,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November 17, 2005
Felix,

I explained to that diplomat that he has diplomatic immunity and doesn't have to show anybody anything. All he has to do is wave his diplomatic passport under their noses and they have to let him leave untouched. This is international law, my friend.

I don't think you have to worry about it. I think he's just making excuses to stay in Spain longer. He says he's in Madrid but I'll bet he's probably lurking around the topless beaches in Toremolinos. Hell, I would.

He's supposed to write and give me his arrival time in Moscow so I can fly down there and meet him. I hope he doesn't wait until the last minute to let me know.

I'll let you know when he gets here.
Lewd



Johnson Boora

Thu, 17 Nov 2005

PLEASE DO SEND THE 2,500.00 EUROS IMMEDIATELY, THROUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER ON THE NAME OF

MR.ROBSON HUDSON AS THE RECIVER HERE IN MADRID SPAIN, SO THAT WE CAN BE ABLE TO GET THE CLEARANCE CERTIFICATE AND PROCEED IMMEDIATELY TO YOUR GIVEN ADDRESS.

HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU AS SOON AS YOU MAKE THE TRANSFER OF THE MONEY,

DR. JOHNSON BOORA.



Lewd Noogie

November 18, 2005
Felix,

Your diplomat there in Spain is an idiot. He won't answer my questions or take my suggestions. I still say that jerkoff is trying to milk this deal for all it's worth. He wants me to send him 2,500 Euros, probably to cover his gambling losses or drug habit. I have a feeling that this is going to end up costing me a lot of money, my friend. Not to mention that I've been paying for a hotel suite that is still sitting empty while this twit is working on his tan in Costa del Sol.

Do you think I should go ahead and send it to him or try and reason with him some more?

Lewd



[Felix sends the next one 3 times...]

Felix Dunga

Fri, 18 Nov 2005

Dear Lewd,

I saw your mail and what i have to do is to rush to the bank this morning to see the director to know what we can be able to do to see that the diplomat arrives to your country.

The director told me that the only you have to do is to send the money that the customs at the Madrid airport are demanding for the certificate as to release the consignment so that the diplomat will travel to your country with the consignment.Please sir i am pleading to you to see that you send the money (2500 euros) to the diplomat immediately so that he can come with consignment since the director have assured me that it is the only thing holding him there.

Sir, please try to understand that if the diplomat leaves the consignment there that we will lose it after spending the whole money and time and you should know that the more the consignment is at the airport and the more they will be suspecting it so please try all your possible best to see that you send him the money immediately so that the box will not stay for a long time there again. I am eargerly waiting for your urgent reply and please keep me informed as soon as you recieve the box from the diplomat so that you will send money to me to buy my flight ticket to come and meet you immediately please just do it for my sake today.

Best regards,
Felix



[Felix thinks I've forgotten all about the picture. I haven't.]

Lewd Noogie

Ok, Felix, here's the deal.

As I mentioned to you earlier, Gadyukina is a small village and there is no Western Union here. Ms. Bushburn, my Administrative Assistant, will be driving to Irkutsk on Sunday morning. There is a Western Union there and she can send the money to this diplomat early Monday.

However, since this little venture has cost and is continuing to cost me money, I want to be very certain that I'm getting my money's worth. I told you from the very beginning that I could not have you coming here and spending all your time with pastors and praying and stuff. You assured me that you had changed your lifestyle and had taken up smoking, drinking, and chasing girls. I asked for a picture of you holding a can of beer and smoking, which you never sent. If I'm going to have to pay all this money I want that picture, but now I want one of you holding a cigarette (or cigar), a can (or bottle) of beer, and a girl on your lap.

You see, Felix, I have to be absolutely certain that you have changed, and I'm not willing to take your word for it. I'm very serious about this. If I'm going to be taking care of you I want someone who lives my healthy lifestyle. The percentage of this money you offered me will be very useful but I make enough money already to be comfortable. I very much want to help you get a good start in life but I have to know I have the right material to work with.

Send me the picture and Maya (Ms. Bushburn) will leave for the Irkutsk Western Union office with the money for the diplomat. If you're still not willing to do this then I again offer my original suggestion - find someone else to help you. This is not negotiable.

I hope you'll see things my way so we can get you here quickly.

Lewd



[Felix sends his last message 3 more times...]


Lewd Noogie

November 18, 2005
Felix,

You can send that message a hundred more times but it won't change my mind. As I stated before, Maya (Bushburn) will leave for Irkutsk Sunday morning. If you want her to take the money for the diplomat with her, send the picture.

Lewd



[It seems that Felix has not been entirely thruthful with me regarding his lifetyle transition...]

Felix Dunga

Fri, 18 Nov 2005
Subject: I AM NOT READY TO DO THESE THINGS PLEASE

Dear Lewd,

Look i am telling you this once and for all and not that i am too deseprate to come to your country because what you are telling me to do is against my religion and i can never do that so if you are not willing simply write to the diplomat immediately so that he can come back with the box and stop telling me to take a picture with a girl or cigar or beer because i don't indulge myself in such things.

Listen and listen good now because i cannot continue to beg you everyday so if you are not willing then bye bye because it is too much. I await your urgent reply to know what step to take.

Best regards,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November 19, 2005
Felix,

I am sorry to hear that you lied to me when you said you were changing your lifestyle. I cannot express in words how disappointed I am, but I guess I suspected it all along.

It's like I told you from the beginning - I can't have someone around who spends all day praying and muttering amen all the time. It would drive me nuts. I had such high hopes for you and was dreaming about all the good times we were going to have here. Ah, well.

I will write to your diplomat and tell him to return to Abidjan as you requested.

Best of luck to you Felix and I hope everything works out for you. Stay in touch and let me know how you're doing once in awhile.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

November 19, 2005

Mr. Boora,

I'm sorry to say that my partner has called the deal off and has asked me to instruct you to return to Abidjan with the consignment.

Sorry for your trouble but at least you got a nice vacation in Spain out of it.

It's been, uh, interesting working with you.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Sat, 19 Nov 2005
Subject: I AM WITH YOU

dear lewd

thank you for your respond and your expresssion to me , dear while you dont' understand me very,i think i have told you inisialy that i am under your toon i will do as yopu want me to do in your country, i am not giong to pray or going to the church

i am in such life you want, while are border your self by demanding such a picture for me again, while the consigment has already shifted from abidjan near to your contry after spending all the money and time now see what your talking abount, while not shoo me your self long time agoo when you can do as you want, but i want you to uderstand that i am not in prayer again or going to church , i am life stile guy now as you want me to do, i am under your control

even in your country i will be in your control i will respact you as you want, so diceapline for you just think about it and having hope to hear from you soonest

yours sincerely
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November 19, 2005
Felix,

You have changed your story too many times, Felix,

and I'm afraid I have lost all trust in you. If I'm going to continue spending money on this, the only way is for you to send the picture I ask for. Otherwise it stops now.

Ms. Bushburn will leave for Irkutsk on Monday morning but if I don't get the picture she will leave without the money for the diplomat.

Sorry.
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sat, 19 Nov 2005
dear lewd

i say i am still with you as you want, but my problem is the photo picture. the camera man or the photography will joke with me , and he will post it in the media newspapers i hope you knows african very well so that is the major reasing, so i fill that every thing will take place in your contry dont' worry we shall joy our life together

greet my lover girl for me, just have a nice good day

yours sincerely
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November 19, 2005
Nice try, Felix. Have one of your friends take the picture. Felix, I'm not asking you to have your picture taken naked or anything like that. Just holding a beer and a cigarette, with a girl sitting on your lap. That's all, just to prove to me that you can do it.

Ms. Bushburn is leaving for Irkutsk Monday morning. If you want her to send the money to the diplomat you should get the picture to me tomorrow.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sun, 20 Nov 2005
DEAR LEWD

I HAVE TOLD YOU THAT TO SEND MY PICTURE IS NOT PROBLEM ? MY PROBLEM IS THE CAMERA MAN HERE IN ABIDJAN MAY USED MY PHOTO AS YOU WANT IT TO BE TAKEN AS A JOKE AND HE CAN SEND IT TO NEWS PAPERS BROKERS

JUST SIMPLE UNDERSTAND ME IS YOU AND I WILL STAY IN YOUR COUNTRY ?I WILL DO WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO ALRIGHTY? UNDERSTAND ME VERY WELL I AM WITH YOU YOU DONT'NEED TO BORDER YOUR SELF I HAVED AGREED WITH YOU TO BE SINCERELY

JUST SEND THE MONEY TO THE DIPLOMAT TOMMORO IN OTHER TO LET HER CONTINUE HIS JORNING TO YOUR COUNTRY? THANK AND HAVING HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

November 20, 2005
Felix,

I know you have friends who have digital cameras; have one of them take your picture and send it to me. Besides, what do you care if they put your picture in the newspaper? You should be proud to have a picture like that in the papers, it marks you as a stud! Hell, if it was me I'd put it up on a billboard in downtown Abidjan!

Ms. Bushburn is leaving for Irkutsk in the morning. You'd better get that picture to me tonight or tomorrow morning at latest if you want her to send the money to the diplomat.

Have a good night.
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Mon, 21 Nov 2005
DEAR LEWD

I FILL BEST THING I WILL DO IS TO INSTRUCT THE DIPLOMAT TO RETURED THE TRUNK BOX BACK HERE ABIDJAN?SINCE YOU DISIDED TO JOKE WITH MY LIFE HOPE?

AND ALSO INSTRUCT THE BANK HERE IN ABIDJAN TO TRANSFERD THE MONEY INTO THERE CORRESPONDING BANK IN BELGIUN FOR SELFETY?

THANK
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

November 22, 2005
Felix,

I'm sorry you feel that way but you have only yourself to blame. Mine was a very small request.

I was ready to help you Felix, but I could not do it without verification. This story you told me about the photographer putting your picture in the newspaper is about the lamest excuse I've ever heard. What do you care, you would have been here anyhow.

One last bit of advice - fire that dumb-ass diplomat.

I still wish you the best of luck and let me know how it all turns out.

Your friend,
Lewd



[You gotta hand it to Felix. He may not be too bright but he is one tenacious lad...]

Felix Dunga

Tue, 29 Nov 2005
Dear Lewd

Howe are you i hope your alright in your place , please sir dont ' be offended , i am now dicided to instruct the local bank here in abidjan to transfered the the money into there corresponding bank in belgiun, for safety porpused, please if you are willing in this very transaction kindily get back to me immediatily so that i will forwarding to you the contacts of the corresponding bank in belgiun, and intruct them to transfered the money into your normineted accounts in your country with immediet effect, please get back to me now

thank and remain blesse

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

November 29, 2005
Good to hear from you Felix and I'm glad to hear you were able to get your money back to Abidjan. I don't really understand why you want to transfer it to Belgiun but I guess it's your money. If you want me to hold it in my account I have no problem with that.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 30 Nov 2005

Dear Uncle Lewd

thank you so much for your respond,the reasing that i want the money to transfered to belgiun is for the safety of the money because of the political crisis in the country

Secondily belgiun is one of the european contry were the transaction can goes easily for any accounts, any way i know that you dont' have any problem if the money inter to your accounts that is why you haved been contacted for the first time

so my dear i will forward to you the contacts of the corresponding bank in belgiun later, in other for you to contacts them and in other for to instruct the bank in belgiun to transfered the money into your normineted accounts in your country immediatily? thank and having hope to hear from you soonest

yours sincerely
Felix



Lewd Noogie

December 1, 2005

Felix,

I don't understand why you feel it is necessary for me to contact the bank in Belgiun. You already have my banking information, just tell them to transfer it. You can probably do it yourself online from your home computer.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

December 4, 2005

Felix,

What's going on, did you change your mind about this?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sun, 4 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd

thank you for your respond , i have not change my mind ,your contacts information and your bank data has been forwaded to the corresponding bank in belgiun ,i hope the bank in belgiun will contacted you at any time this week, please be alert,next did your phone contacts is okey?

thank and remain blessed

yours sincerely
Felix



Felix Dunga

Mon, 5 Dec 2005

DEAR LEWD

, LIKE I TOLD YOU THE MONEY HAVE MOVE TO BELGIUM ,THIS MORNING I WENT TO THE BANK AS YOU SAID THAT THE BANK FROM BELGIUM HAVE NOT CONTACTED YOU.

THE DIRECTOR OF REMITTANCE TOLD ME THAT THE FUND HAS BEEN TRANSFERED TO THEIR OFFSHORE PAYMENT CENTER BELGIUM AND HE GAVE ME THERE CONTACT THAT YOU SHOULD CONTACT THEM IMMEDIATELY .

HERE IS THE NAME AND TELEPHONE OF THE CONTACT PERSON IN BELGIUM. MR ROBERT LANCIA OR MRS ANET GRAHAM GOFFIN GROUP NV1000 BRUSSELS BELGIUMTEL: 32485277806email: goffingroupnv@yahoo.com

PLEASE CONTACT THEM ASOON AS POSSIBLE AND BACK TO ME.
THE DIRECTOR OF REMITTANCE HERE GAVE HIS CONTACT INCASE IF WE NEED HIS ADVISE HIS NAME IS DR KEN WILLIAMS HIS DIRECT TELEPHONE 0022508561901.

PLEASE YOU SHOULD CO-OPERATE AND BE POLITE WITH THEM SO THAT THIS MONEY WILL BE SUCESSFULY TRANSFER TO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT.

I AM WAITING TO HEAR FROM YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX DUNGA



Lewd Noogie

December 6, 2005
Felix,

Did the bank say when they will contact me?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Tue, 6 Dec 2005
dear lewd

i dont' know the time when the bank will contact you, but all i know is that they will contact you in there normal time,and mean while you dont' to look after them just go ahead and contact the bank in belgium with the information i send to you, contact the them and let me know

thank and remain blessed,

yours sincerely
Felix



Felix Dunga

Thu, 8 Dec 2005
MR Lewd,

If you have not contactes the bank please do so it is very important as delay may be dengerous for us .

please do that and I expect your mail

Thanks
Felix



Lewd Noogie

November 8, 2005
Felix,

I don't understand why I need to contact the bank in belgiun. Didn't you send them my account information and give them instructions to make the transfer? If you did, the money should be showing up in my account any time now.

You worry too much Felix.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

Attn: Ms Anet Graham

My partner, Mr. Felix Dunga of Togo, has depoited a large sum of money with your institution with instructions to transfer the money to my account. I believe he has already provided you with my account information.

Please proceed with the transfer and notify me when complete.

Sincerely,
Lewis D, Noogie



Lewd Noogie

Felix,

I went ahead and wrote to the bank in belgiun. I'll let you know once the transfer has been made.

How's everything else with you?

Lewd



Anet Graham

(X-Originating-IP: [209.191.87.106])

Mon, 12 Dec 2005

ATTENTION: LEWD NOOGIE

WE ACKNOWLEDGE RECEIPT OF YOUR MAIL AND A TRANSACTION SENT TO US FROM AFRICA ON YOUR NAME. THE FUND WAS SENT TO US LAST WEEK WITHOUT PROPER PURPOSE OF TRANSFER AND WAS RETURNED BACK TO AFRICA. BUT IT HAS SINCE BEEN RE-PACKAGE BACK AGAIN TO EUROPE WITH YOUR FULL DETAILS.

PLEASE SEND TO US BY MAIL ATTACHEMENT COPIES OF YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVER'S LICENSE FOR IDENTIFICATION.

YOU WILL NEED TO COME OVER TO BRUXELLES TO SIGN FOR NECESSARY CLEARANCE RELEASE DOCUMENTS PHYSICALLY, OPEN A NON RESIDENT ACCOUNT WITH OUR CORRESPONDENCE BANK HERE AND PAY FOR THE COMPANY HANDLING FEES INCLUDING INSURANCE BEFORE WE CAN MOVE FORWARD.

AS SOON AS WE RECEIVE YOUR REPLY CONCERNING THE ABOVE ALL DETAILS WILL BE SEND TO YOU ASAP.

THANKING YOU FOR COOPERATION.

KIND REGARDS,
MRS ANET GRAHAM
E/O
FOR: GOFFIN GROUP NV



Lewd Noogie

December 13, 2005

Ms. Graham,

I will address each of your comments:

1. My international passport / drivers licence - I make it a practice never to send these through email. I should point out that you are making a transfer to an account provided to you by Mr. Dunga so I see no reason why your having a copy of these documents would be necesary.

2. My attendance in Belgium to sign clearance documents - I am receiving the funds in your possession, not sending them. Common banking procedures dictate that Mr. Dunga would be responsible for signing any clearance documents. If he has not already done so I would suggest you send them to him for signature.

3. The necessity for me to open a 'non-resident' account with your correspondent bank - Please explain the necessity of this to me. I see this as a simple transfer from your banking institution to my banking institution. I routinely make large transfers between countries and I have never heard of having to open an account with a correspondent bank.

4. Company handling fees and insurance - Please quantify these 'handling fees', i.e., how much are we talking here? And this insurance you mention is for what?

I look forward to your earliest response.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Mon, 12 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd,

I receive your mail and I thank you for your effort . I am very happy for the great move you made as you have contacted the Belgium bank , like you said i will be waitting to hear from you as soon as the transfer is made

I wish you the best of luck in your endeavours.

Thanks
Felix Dunga



Lewd Noogie

December 13, 2005

Felix,

I have heard from the Belgian bank this morning, and all I can tell you is that you are so fortunate to have found me to help you with this. Felix, my friend, I hate to tell you this but you have got this whole thing pretty well dicked up. I've never heard of anyone having so much trouble moving money. It should be the simplest thing in the world.

I mean, think about it - this money starts out in Togo, moves to Spain, can't get to Russia so back to Togo it goes, then it goes to Belgium, then back to Togo, and now it's in Belgium again. Felix,this money will be so worn out by the time I get it we won't be able to spend it.

I'm gonna help you with this but based on your performance to date I want you to stay out of it. Just sit there and let me handle this. If I need you I'll call on you.

Lewd



Anet Graham

Tue, 13 Dec 2005

ATTENTION: LEWD NOOGIE

WE RECEIVED YOUR LAST AND AGREED TO GET BACK TO YOUR AGENT IN AFRICA.

AS SOON AS WE ARE THROUGH,WE SHALL CONTACT YOU TO ACCOMPLISH THE TRANSACTION.

THANKING YOU FOR COOPERATION

YOURS FAITHFULLY,
FOR: GOFFIN GROUP NV



Felix Dunga

Tue, 13 Dec 2005

Dear lewd,

I am in receipt of your maill this morning and iam happy for all your effort to conclude this transaction very quick .

Infact I have given you a go ahead order to take care of the business as iam here praying for God mercy upon us.

Please sir, as soon as the money gets into your account kindly send me some money so that i can arrange for my travelling to meet you in your country.

Please take note ,I am in Abidjan Cote d' Ivoire not Togo as you mentioned in your mail. However , i will like to hear from you, from time to time as to know the position of things.

Thanks
Felix Dunga



Felix Dunga

Wed, 14 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd

Howe are you today i hope your alrighty, i dont' hear from you this moning, have you conluded with the bank in belgium,if you are okay try to let me know,

Thank and having hope to hear from you soonest,

Yours sincerely
Felix



Lewd Noogie

December 15, 2005

Felix,

Sorry about the Togo thing but my geology really sucks - I thought Togo was like the capital of Ivory Coast.

The lady at the bank said they have some preliminaries they have to take care of and then they will contact me to let me know what has to be done to finalize this. She told me that I will have to go to Bruxelles to sign off on it and take receipt of the funds. I hope they get back to me quickly because I'll have to see about finding time to make the trip. Fortunately Belgiun isn't very far from Russia.

I'll keep you informed on what happens.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Thu, 15 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd,

I receive your mail and I thank you for every of your effort in this transaction may almighty God be with you.

when do you hope to travel to Belgium , however I wish you safe journey and best of luck in your efforts.

Please try to co-operate with them so that there will be no hinch or hendras towards receiving the fund into your account.

For your efforts , that you have made so far and finally if you claim the fund or receive the fund into your account your percentage will increase.

Do not forget to reach me if you are in Belgium

Thanks and God be with you and your family.
Felix



Lewd Noogie

December 16, 2005

Felix,

You see what I mean? It's been 3 days and I haven't heard a word from that bank in Belgiun. Where DO you find these guys?

Listen, I have to make a business trip shortly and was hoping to take care of the business in Bruxelles at the same time. If these guys don't contact me soon it will have to be put off until after the new year. Can you push them a little?

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 16 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd,

I thank you for your information I will contact the bank here to advise their coresponding bank in Belgium to reach you as soon as possible.

But do not wait for them , you should try your best to contact them as you know this is ending of the year, they may have too much of work in there office to take care off. So you need to warry them and tell them when you are going to be there in ( Belgium).

I wait to hear from you

Thanks and God bless you
Felix



Lewd Noogie

December 17, 2005

Attn: Ms. Anet Graham

Ms. Graham,

I have not heard from you since 13 December. I would like to bring to your attention that we are dealing with a rather large sum of money here and my partner and I would like to get this thing off the dime.

Please let me know what is causing the delay.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Mon, 19 Dec 2005

Attention Lewis D. Noogie

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, wherein you requesting for an urgent treatment of your transaction

Please confirm the information stated herein as your bank account co-ordinates

Name Mr Lewd Noogie
Bank Name: MultiBanka
City: Estonia Branch
Country: Latvia
Swift Code: MULTLV3Y
Beneficiary: DLN Associates LLC

For your information, we are working with a prime bank in Belgium to affect the transfer, however, this will require the service of an attorney at law to finalise it.

Conform this as they way forward.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms. Anet Graham



Felix Dunga

Mon, 19 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd

Why i have not hear from you for some days, i hope is alright in your side, please i want to know how long you have gone for your travelling to belgium have the the corresponing bank in belgium contacted you, just let me know for my confidence,

thank and having hope to hear from you
Felix



Lewd Noogie

December 19, 2005

Felix,

Relax, my friend, I'm working with the bank in Belgium. I'll let you know when I have some solid information.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

December 19, 2005

Ms. Graham,

I thank you for your response but I think there must be some mistake. This is a simple transfer from one account to another and I see no need for the involvement of an attorney. With my account information you have you should be able to make the transfer immediately.

Please let me know when this has been accomplished.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Tue, 20 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd,

I thank you for your mail and I pray that God will give you the strenght to follow up this transaction to the sucessful end of it.

As you advised , I am waiting with prayer as you know with God every thing is possible. So i hope to hear a good news from you as soon as possible.

Thanks
My Regards
Felix



Felix Dunga

Thu, 22 Dec 2005

Dear Uncle Lewd

please just always keepme alert, by sending me the information of what is happeing between you and the bank in belgium, that can makes me fill alright in my heart ,and to know when the bank has been transfered the money into your normineted accounts in your country, also you knows that the year is abount to end,off which you surposed to keep me alert on the projects

thank and be blessed, hopping to hear from you soonest?

Felix Dunga



Felix Dunga

Sat, 24 Dec 2005

Dear Lewd,

Thank you for your good respons, now i am fill alright to hear from you, and also i am very happy of your effort concerning this very transaction, my advice is continiou your job, every thing shall end very soon, and also try to keep me alert when ever you contacted the corresponding bank in belgium,

Thank and happy chrismas, and having hope to hear from you soonest,

Yours sincerely
Felix



Lewd Noogie

Attn: Anet Graham

Ms. Graham,

I would like to make arrangements to come to Belgium to finalize the transaction with my African partner. Please send me the details of what I will be reqired to do while I am there.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Fri, 30 Dec 2005

ATTENTION: LEWD NOOGIE

FOR YOUR OWN SECURITY INTEREST AND SPEEDY CLEARANCE YOU MUST FIRST GET IN TOUCH WITH US BY CONFIRMING YOUR BANK ACCOUNT CO-ORDINATE PROPERLY THEN WE WILL GO THROUGH AND ADVICE YOU ON NECESSARY MODE OF CLEARACE AND ARRANGEMENT FOR YOUR SECURITY PAPER PASS.

PLEASE COME ALONG WITH YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVER'S LICENSE FOR IDENTIFICATION.

YOUR TWO (2) RECENT PASSPORT PICTURES (PHOTOGRAPH)

PLEASE SEND TO US BY MAIL ATTACHEMENT COPIES OF YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVER'S LICENSE FOR IDENTIFICATION.

YOU WILL NEED TO COME OVER TO BRUXELLES TO SIGN FOR NECESSARY CLEARANCE RELEASE DOCUMENTS PHYSICALLY, OPEN A NON RESIDENT ACCOUNT WITH OUR CORRESPONDENCE BANK HERE AND PAY FOR THE COMPANY HANDLING FEES INCLUDING INSURANCE BEFORE WE CAN MOVE FORWARD.

AS SOON AS WE RECEIVE YOUR REPLY CONCERNING THE ABOVE ALL DETAILS WILL BE SEND TO YOU ASAP.

THANKING YOU FOR COOPERATION.

KIND REGARDS,
MRS ANET GRAHAM
E/O
FOR: GOFFIN GROUP NV



Lewd Noogie

Ms. Graham,

Thank you for your rapid response. I believe I mentioned before that I do not send scans of my identification through email. I will present all necessary identification when I arrive.

Please inform me of what your handling fees will be.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Tue, 3 Jan 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie

GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail and the content understood.

Since you have decided to visit for the collection of your consignment, it is our pleasure to inform you that our vault is in Netherlands and we will deliver to you there, this will be upon the presentation of the required identification.

Apparently we wish to inform you that you are to make the following payment upon arrival before the transaction will be released.

Terminal charges 2100 euro
Demurrage fee 3997 euro
Administrative charges 2779
Vat 10% 887.6
Grand total 9763.6

Please confirm the receipt of the mail and your arrival date but before your arrival to enable us send our form A for your completion and you will return it back with dispatch.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Felix Dunga

Tue, 3 Jan 2006

Dear

IT is deapily surprise to me that since i mighty reseived your last email of which you informed that you wrote to the bank in belgium asking them what to do concerning for your visitetion in belgium,off which i asking you of your latest response through the bank, mean while till now i have never hear any thing , whether the bank have wrot to you or not ,you surposed informed me howe long you gone with the bank so that i will be sure of every thing?

I, wish you Happy new year and prosperity, and also having hope to hear from you soonest,

Yours Sincerely
Felix



[Felix figures by now I MUST have forgotten about the picture. I haven't.]

Lewd Noogie

January 4, 2006

Felix,

Relax, there's nothing to worry about. I'm in touch with the bank and getting everything sorted out with them. Actually, this is working out better than I anticipated; they want me to come to their offices in Amsterdam and I need to go there anyhow. I will be spending a couple of weeks with the management of the hotel Krasnopolsky to help them prepare for the imminent return of some distinguished guests from the Foreign Office.

So we're very close my friend, and at he moment I only see one very minor obstacle to clear before we finish this project. The bank is requiring that I pay 9,763.6 Euros to finalize the transaction. This is quite alot of money but as I have always told you I'm willing to do it to help you out. However, my conditions have not changed. Before I invest my money into this venture, I still want you to send me a picture of yourself with holding a can of beer, smoking a cigarette, and with a woman sitting on your lap. I have to be certain that you have abandoned this idea that you have to spend all your time praying with pastors and stuff like that. I want to know that the person coming here to live with me is into the manly arts of drinking, smoking, chasing women.and generally living the good life.

Think of the fun we'll have, Felix. Out every night, loose women in and out at all hours, hangovers - sounds great, doesn't it? And don't forget Oxnard. She's still very interested in making your arrival here, uh, interesting!

Send me the picture and let's get this finished. I will be making my travel arrangements to Amsterdam this week so get it to me quickly.

Waiting to hear from you.
Lewd



[Felix figures if he ignores my demand for the picture I'll forget about it. I won't.]

Felix Dunga

Wed, 4 Jan 2006

DEAR LEWD

, HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

PLEASE I WANT TO KNOW EXACTLY YOUR PROGRAM TO TRAVEL TO BELGIUM AS YOU SAID , TO CONCLUDE THIS TRANSACTION.

IT WILL BE VERY GOOD, IF YOU CAN ARRANGE AND TRAVEL TO BELGIUM TO RECEIVE THIS MONEY OR BY TRANSFER.

IT IS IMPORTANT I HEAR FROM YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, LAST TIME I GAVE YOU A PHONE NUMBER WHERE YOU CAN REACH ME, BUT I DID NOT HEAR FROM YOU.

PLEASE I WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE .

THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU.
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

January 5, 2006

Felix,

I wrote to you yesterday and explained everything. Try and get that picture to me today.

Lewd



Anet Graham

Thu, 5 Jan 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail and the content understood.

Since you have decided to visit for the collection of your consignment, it is our pleasure to inform you that our vault is in Netherlands and we will deliver to you there, this will be upon the presentation of the required identification.

Apparently we wish to inform you that you are to make the following payment upon arrival before the transaction will be released.

Terminal charges 2100 euro
Demurrage fee 3997 euro
Administrative charges 2779
Vat 10% 887.6
Grand total 9763.6

Please confirm the receipt of the mail and your arrival date but before your arrival to enable us send our form A for your completion and you will return it back with dispatch.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

January 5, 2006

Ms. Graham,

While I find your charges to be a bit extreme, I am prepared to pay them upon my arrival in Amsterdam. I have a few issues to work out with my partner before I can give you my departure time but upon their resolution I will inform you of my exact time of arrival so that we can schedule a meeting.

This will be my first time to visit Amsterdam. Perhaps you might have some time after working hours to show me around?

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Thu, 5 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd

thank you so much of your effort of concluding this very transaction very soon,just go ahaed for your work,already you are with my original picture, you dont need of bordering your self by demanding a photo which i will holding a botle of bear and women,of cause this is the life of stile i am with i love that, but i can not take a picture of that with one reasing, of which i haved alreday explain it to you,last time, so you don't need to asking this again, that is not important, the most thing there is to you to finish the transaction, and warch me over there weather i haved change or not, dear go ahaed to complete the transaction,i will not disappiot you , i am with you lewd, and also if at all the bank is demainding my photo you have it there, please corpret matuelly,

thank and having hope to hear from you soonest?
Felix



Lewd Noogie

Felix,

I heard from the bank today. They sent me the necessary form to fill out for claiming your money. Everything is all set, all I have to do is inform them of my arrival time.

Felix my friend, I'm afraid I have to insist that you send me that picture. You see, I still don't think you've changed at all. This is a very small request and yet you have refused to provide it. I'm not going to pay out almost 10,000 Euros and bring you here without being absolutely sure that you're going to fit in with my life style.

Send the picture so I can tell the bank when I can travel.

The ball is in your hands, my friend.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 6 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd,

i have told you several time in this case? that i am not giong to church again, i am not praying again? i can stay with woman from money to night, this the life i love like you say and you want from me, of which i have explain it to you several occation, then while are you still boadering again, you have my original photo, this one you need from me i dont' think it will work,

just travel to belgium for the transaction and finish it, if i rich over your country Russia, the first thing you will do for me is to try me with woman, drinking alcohol, giong to club, from that you will know my chengies,every thing will be clear to you,that is were you will find the real one, not now because we are not in the same place or together,so my friend fill free and relax i am with you all the time and days, thank and remain blessed and having hope to hear from you soonest?

Yours Sincerely,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 6, 2006

Felix, my friend,

Let me explain something to you again. I have put a lot of money into this project already with nothing to show for it. I had to pay for a hotel room for your diplomat friend who was going to bring the money from Spain. The hotel room sat empty for 10 days because that jerkoff couldn't figure how to get the money out of Spain. On top of that I had to put a $500 deposit on a helicopter to bring him to Gadyukina which was unrefundable.

No, my friend, I'm not putting another kopek into this until I'm sure that you are being truthful with me and the only way I can be sure is for you to send me that picture I asked for. If you do that, I'll see this thing to the end. If you don't, I'm out.

Send me the picture and I will send my itinerary to the bank office in Amsterdam. Otherwise, you need to find someone else to help you. I'm not going to take any more chances.

Sorry my friend, thems the rules.

No more telling me to forget the picture. I'm not gonna forget.

Let me know your decision.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 6 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd

Why you cant' understand simple thing like this, is it my picture that you are going for in belgium or your going to transferd my late fathers money into your accounts in your country,i hope your a white man, dont' behaved like a kinds behaved like a matured person, which gain are you going to get with my picture holding a botle of wine , cigaret or woman, it looks ogely and stupid,so my friend if want to do this very deal to the end this is your last chance,so never you provoke me with such idear i am not a begger,just becuase of the death of my father that is why i am troletting all this sheet,

please my friend do what you want to do that all,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 7, 2005

Felix,

There's something going on here that I don't understand and I'm beginning to get suspicious. You're asking me to go all the way to Belgium or Amsterdam, pay 10,000 Euros of my own money, after I've already paid almost $3,000 for an unused hotel room and transportation for your half-wit diplomat friend in Spain, and you won't even send me the picture I ask for. Sending me this picture would be the easiest thing in the world but you won't do it. Yes, this is making me very suspicious, my friend..

I am making arrangments to travel to Amsterdam this week or next but I will not be contacting the bank. I will finish my business with the hotel there and then I will return here.

I'm very sorry this didn't work out. I will suggest to you again that you find someone who's religious beliefs are more in line with your own, someone who will pray with you all day and with whom you can discuss stuff like Jonah parting the Dead Sea and stuff like that. This is what you really want, isn't it?

I truly wish you well, Felix. Stay in touch and let me know how you're doing once in awhile.

Your friend,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Tue, 10 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd, why are still mension of surspect for this very transaction, my dear i am innocent and rightoues,that is the reasing why i want you to go to belgium orholland and witness every thing with your eye, in the bank, and also for you verifing very well, how the money will be transfered into your account in your country,

so you dont' need to misunderstand with me you haved my original photo that no one evidence to prove, you the document the deposit slip giving to my late father during the deposit by the bank here in abidjan( Cote d' Ivoire)my dear i want to know the very day you will travell to belgium or holland for the transaction, thank and let hear from you soonest,

Sincerely Yours
Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 10, 2006

Felix,

Sorry, my friend, as much as I want to help you I'm afraid I can't. I've explained why the picture is important to me and without it we can't go any further.

You're refusal to send me the picture tells me you haven't really changed at all. I will tell you again, you need to find someone who shares your deep religious beliefs to help you with this. Nothing, not even more money, is as important to me as my wild and crazy lifestyle.

Once you find someone to help you with this, please stay in touch and let me know how it all goes.

Your friend,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Tue, 10 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd why you cant' understand simple words, i have told you offting and onn, that i have totaly change,

i can leave like home boy, going to club and cheasing beatifull women on the streat,drinking, smoking, then i am not praying again or going to churches again i have stop all this, all is bye de away to me as off now,

if you realy want to help, just closely your eye and do every thing normal, have you range with the bank in belgium, the date of your arrival please let me know,

thank
Felix



Lewd Noogie

Felix,

Let me lay this out for you as simply as I can. I will keep this short so your lips don't get tired reading it:

1. I really, really WANT to help you get your money and come here to live with me. I want to help you get a good start in life.

2. I am READY to help you. I have to go to Amsterdam anyway to consult with a hotel there. Stopping by the bank and getting your money would be no problem for me.

3. I will go to Amsterdam but I will not visit the bank unless you send me the picture I am asking you for.

Felix, the picture I am asking you for is a very small thing, and you and I both know it is very easy for you to do. Just have one of your friends take it, and send it to me. Do this and I will make an appointment to visit the bank while I am in Amsterdam. Otherwise, no dice.

Thems what's the rules, take it or leave it.

Let me know.
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 11 Jan 2006

DEAR LEWD

HOW CAN I SEND TO YOU ANOTHER PERSON IMAGE?WHILE YOU HOLD MY ORIGINAL PHOTO?THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO ME?ALSO THAT IS TOTALY RISK IN THIS VERY TRANSACTION WHAT OFF 10.700.000 MILLION UNITED STETA DOLLAR? YOU HOLD MY ORIGINAL PHOTO THAT ALL I KNOW? PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR ARRIVAL AT AMESTERDAM

YOURS SINCERELY
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

January 11, 2006

Felix,

my friend, I'm sorry but I didn't understand your letter. I'm not asking you for a picture of another person, I'm asking for a picture of YOU! All I suggested was that you have a friend TAKE the picture of YOU!

I'm afraid I can't tell you when I will be travelling to Amsterdam because it's not necessary for you to know, other than I will be travelling soon. I have already made my flight arrangements. Like I told you before, if you send me the picture before I go, I'll make an appointment with the bank. If you don't send the picture, I go to Amsterdam, do my business with the hotel, and come back to Russia.

Felix, it's all up to you.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

January 13, 2006

Felix,

I presume since I haven't heard from you for a couple of days that you are either searching for or have found someone else to help you get your money. I really think this is the best solution and I wish you the best of luck with it. I just hope that you find someone who knows what they're doing.

Be sure and stay in touch and let me know how things turn out.

Your friend,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 13 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd,

i am still with you, i waiting to know your arrival to holland

thank
Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 13, 2006

Felix,

I think you misunderstood me - I'm going to Holland but I will not be stopping at the bank. The only reason I wrote to you was to wish you good luck in finding someone else to help you. As you were not willing to provide the picture I asked you for I have excused myself from the transaction.

I really do wish you luck in finding someone to help you and I just want you to stay in touch and let me know how it goes.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

January 16, 2006

Felix,

I arrived in Amsterdam last night and it's good to be back here again. The city has changed so much from the last time I was here. It's still a very charming place.

Felix, I expect to be here for about 10 days, assuming no unexpected problems arise here at the hotel I'm consulting to. I can stop at the bank if you want me to but you know what you have to do first. Let me know.

Lewd



[Felix has the attention span of a gnat...]

Felix Dunga

Tue, 17 Jan 2006

Dear Lewd,

Thank you so much of your effort to travell to Amsterdam for the conclusion of this very transaction,

please let me know how far you have gone with bank in Amsterdam, have the bank started the transfered of the money into your normineted account,

how abount the fee how much of money did the bank collect from you in Amsterdam, which day you will send me some money for the preparetion of my travell to your country, thank and having hope to hear from you soonest,

Yours Friendily
Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 17, 2005

Felix, my friend, have you gone simple on me? I told you I'm here on a job, not to get your money. You never sent me the picture. I have not been to or talked to the bank, nor will I go or talk to the bank. I will finish my consulting work here and then return to Russia late next week.

You're not serious about getting your father's money. My patience with you has been the stuff of legend, but the day dawns when even the Comstock Lode yields up nothing but gravel. I'm out, Felix.

I have always wished you luck in getting your father's money and I still do.

Lewd



Anet Graham

Wed, 18 Jan 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie

Ref . GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We have waited to hear from you without success, what is the matter with you?

Please treat as a matter of urgency and advise when you will come up with the administrative charges. Bear in mind that this will be done before your arrival to Belgium as the enabling acts make it an economic offence for someone to be in possession of more than five thousand Euros.

Acknowledge the receipt of this mail for better understanding.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

January 19, 2006

Ms. Graham,

Unfortunately my partner and I have had a disagreement on requirements that must be fulfilled before this transaction can proceed and I have terminated my involvement. I am currently in Amsterdam but will not be contacting your bank.

Please understand that this was not my decision and I'm sorry things have turned out this way. I'm sure that Mr. Dunga will be contacting you shortly with alternative arrangements.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Thu, 19 Jan 2006

dear lewd,

you just want to keep me stranded in africa , but god be the glory it cant' works as you want, i am still in formed to search for another helmper

Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 19, 2006

Felix, I have been telling you for weeks that you need to search for someone else. I'm pleased that you finally understand what I have been saying. You need to find someone who's beliefs are closer to yours.

But I also want you to understand that the LAST thing I want is for you to be stranded in Africa. I wanted you to come here where I could teach you manly ways and how to grow into a well-adjusted individual. I was willing and able to help you but I could not do it without proof that you were willing to adopt my lifestyle. You were not willing to give me that proof.

I could go to that bank tomorrow, pay their exorbitant fees, get your father's money and bring you here to Russia to live with me. It was your decision not to, so don't blame me.

I still wish you the very best in finding someone else to help you and I hope you'll stay in touch and let me know how it comes out.

Good luck to you, my friend.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

Ms. Graham,

I feel kind of strange approaching you this way but you seem like a very personable lady and I have a problem that maybe you can assist me with.

I would like to ask if you know my former partner, Felix Dunga, personally? He's a bright young lad and I very much want to help him but he is very hard-headed. I want to bring him to Russia to live but I need evidence that he will not be a burden to me.

I admit I don't have a concrete reason for writing you but he has done business with your firm and I don't know where else to turn.

Please feel free to answer frankly, and I appreciate any advice you can offer.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Thu, 26 Jan 2006

Attention: Mr. Lewd Noogie

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, wherein you are requesting a letter of recommendation for Mr. Felix Dunga.

For your information we have a consignment deposited and authorization for collection by Felix Dunga or any person he issue power of attorney to do same.

In-view of the above therefore, you are requested to arrange for the collection of the consignment with him because it has over stayed in the vault and we will afford to continue to keep it without any good reasons for the delay in collection.

As soon as your ready for collection the company have a standing order, which is the due process of transaction all over Europe now, that cash above five thousand Euro should be paid by account payee only. Therefore, When you request for the collection make sure you have done the payment through our bank account that will be issued to you immediate we receive your request in this regard.

Thanks for your understanding

Yours truly,
Ms. Graham,
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

January 27, 2006

Felix, my friend,

Listen, I just want to give you a heads-up. I got an email from that lady in Amsterdam, Anet Graham. She doesn't write very clearly sometimes but it sounds like if you don't get somebody here quickly to pick up your money that there could be a real problem. She said something about it had overstayed, I don't know, but it sounds like a problem to me.

Have you found someone to help you with this? If you haven't you'd better get moving on it, or come here to get it yourself.

My work here in Amsterdam is taking longer than I thought and it looks like I'm going to be staying here longer than I anticipated. I do so much enjoy this city - the canals, the architecture, the window shopping in the red light district.

Gotta get back to work. You better get on top of this situation Felix. I'd hate to see you have anymore problems with your money.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 27 Jan 2006

dear lewd

i have not yet find any body,

Felix



Lewd Noogie

January 27, 2006

Felix,

You better get busy, my friend. It sounds to me like that bank is getting ready to pull the plug on you. I don't know what they can do legally, but I think you need to move on this, and fast.

If I knew somebody with religious beliefs I might be able to find someone to help you but everyone I know is like me. No help there.

I'm not sure how to help anymore Felix, but I'm seriously worried about this. Are you in contact with the bank?

Lewd



Anet Graham

Mon, 30 Jan 2006

What is the matter again

Advise us accordingly
Goffin



Felix Dunga

Mon, 30 Jan 2006

DEAR LEWD

I AM IN VERY GOOD CONTACTS WITH THE CORRESPONDING BANK IN BELGIUM I DONT THINK THERE WILL WILL BE ANY OBSACLE? I HOLD EVERY DOCUMENT THAT COVER MY LATE FATHER FUND?

YOU CAN ALSO HAVED A CONTACTS WITH THE BANK THEY ARE READY TO GIVE YOU THE SERVICED YOU NEED?

BEST REGARD
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

January 31, 2006

Felix, always good to hear from you my friend. I have a suggestion to make to you Felix - you need to withdraw your money from that bank and return it back to Cote d'Ivoire. I don't have a good feeling about that Anet Graham and I don't think that bank has your best interests at heart.

Felix, I don't like to be gruff with you but I think strong words are all you can understand. Felix, it's time for you to get all off your dead ass and do something about your money. You have been screwing around with it for a long time, too long. If you don't want me to help you then you need to get to work and find someone that you do want to help you. I'm serious, Felis. You're going to loose that money if you're not careful.

Please tell me that you will start seriously looking for someone to help you.

Lewd.



Anet Graham

Fri, 3 Feb 2006

Attention: Mr. Lewd Noogie

Ref . GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We are expecting your mail. Please keep us posted about the arrangement you have reached with your partner.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

February 4, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I have not heard from my partner for some time now and I think it's accurate to say that I am no longer a part of this transaction. I know that he has been searching for someone else to help him with this because of differences that he and I had.

He's a young boy who apparently has no appreciation of the magnitude of this deal and I just hope he decides to put forth some effort to protect his money.

I will be in Amsterdam for a few more days and then I will head back to Russia. I appreciate all your efforts to date and I'm sure that Mr. Dunga will be contacting you regarding further steps for you to take.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Felix Dunga

Tue, 7 Feb 2006

DEAR LEWD,

HOW ARE YOU TODAY REGARDS TO HEALTH WITH YOUR FAMILY AND HOW IS YOUR BUSINESS TOO, I HOPE THINGS ARE MOVING FINE THE WAY YOU EXPECTED IF SO GLORY BE TO GOD ABOVE.

I WRITE IN RESPECT OF THE TRANSACTION , I WANT TO KNOW HOW FAR YOU HAVE GONE WITH THE BANK IN BELGIUM ARE YOU ABLE TO CONCLUDE WITH THEM WHEN ARE YOU RECEIVING THE MONEY ?

LIKE I ADVISED BEFORE, YOU SHOULD NOT ENTATAIN ANY COMMUNICATION OUTSIDE THE BANK FROM BELGIUM TO AVOID MISTAKE.

IF YOU RECEIVE ANY CALL OUTSIDE FROM BANK IN BELGIUM PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO INFORM ME .

PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO HURRY UP AND CONCLUDE THIS BUSINESS AS MY CONDITION HERE IS BECOMING UNBEARABLE.

I NEED YOUR URGENT RESPONCE TO THIS MESSAGE IT IS VERY IMPORTANT I HEAR FROM YOU.

THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU
FELIX



[Felix figures by now I MUST have forgotten about the picture. I haven't.]

Lewd Noogie

February 7, 2006

Felix, my son, you sadden me.

While I want desperately to help you I'm afraid I can't. We've discussed this many times befor and my position hasn't changed. Because you are unwilling to provide the picture I asked you for I am afraid I do not trust your intentions. I'm sorry, but I just don't believe you have changed at all.

I will be here in Amsterdam for only a few more days befor I return to Russia. How I wish you could come there to meet me but without the small commitment I ask from you it cannot hapen.

I would advise you to hurry up and do something about your money. I just don't think you should leave it here any longer. You should have found someone else to help you by now.

As I have always said, I hope you'll stay in touch and let me know how this turns out. I am concerned about you, my friend.

Sincerely,
Lewd



Anet Graham

Tue, 7 Feb 2006

Attention Lewd Noogie

We have a power of attorney issued to the management of goffin group by your partner mandating us to release the consignment to you.

In the light of the above therefore you are requested to issue when you are prepared to visit our vault for collection but before then you should confirm that you are ready to pay the required fee as earlier informed you in our previous mail.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms. Graham, For Goffin Group



Felix Dunga

Wed, 8 Feb 2006

DEAR SIR,

WHAT IS THE MATTER AFTER I HAVE CONFIDE IN YOU THE ONLY INHERITAGE AND THE ONLY HOPE I HAVE TO SURVIVE IN LIFE SINCE THE DEATH OF MY PARENTS.

YOU ARE NOW TELLING ME THAT YOU ARE NOT READY TO HELP ME WHILE I RELAY IN YOU AND I HAVE PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU .

YOU KNOW TOO WELL THAT AT THIS STAGE WE HAVE GONE, THE BANK HAVE KNOW YOU AS MY FOREIGN PATHNER AND THE BENEFICIARY OF THE MONEY AND THERE IS NOWAY I COULD COME UP WITH A DIFFERENT STORY TO THE BANK TO STOP YOU FROM RECEIVING THE MONEY .

I HAVE TOLD YOU THAT ANY AMOUNT YOU SPEND SHOULD BE REMOVED FROM THE TOTAL AMOUNT FIRST BEFORE YOUR PERCENTAGE AND YOU WILL INVEST THE REST OF THE MONEY FOR ME .

I DONT REALY KNOW WHAT IS THE PROBLEM OR WHAT ELSE DO YOU NEED FROM ME THAT I HAVE NEVER PROVIDE BEFORE YOU I DO NOT ASKED YOU TO SEND ME MONEY HERE FROM YOUR POSE, ALL WTHAT I AM SAYING IS FOR YOU TO ASSIS ME TO ROVIDE AN ACCOUNT AND ASSIST ME TO PAY ANY CHARGES THAT MAY COME UP TO ENSSURE SUCESSFUL TRANSFER TO YOUR NORMINATED ACCOUNT IN YOUR COUNTRY .

WHAT TYPE OF DOUGHT DO YOU HAVE WHEN THE BANK HAVE CONTACTED YOU AND YOU HAVE EXCHANGE MAILS AND TELEPHONE CALLS WITH THE BANK ,I WOUNDER IF YOU WANT TO BLOCK THE MONEY JUST LET ME KNOW.

YOU SHOUL ENDEAVOUR TO REASON WITH ME BECAUSE IT IS NOT A BAD THING THAT I DO TO CALL YOU TO SHARE WIT ME MY INHERITAGE.

SIR PLEASE KINDLY CONTACT THE BANK AND FINALIZED WITH THEM BEFORE YOU GO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY.

THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU AS YOU HELP AN ORPHAN.
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

February 9, 2006

Felix,

You said in your email, "I really don't know what is the problem or what else do you need from me that I have never provide before...". You have not provided the ONLY thing that I have EVER asked for which is a picture.

You are not sincere Felix. Providing the picture I asked for is a very simple and easy thing to do but you refuse. You are asking me to put money into this transaction and you are not even willing to show me your sincerety. Sorry, my friend, but I don't work that way. I have been very honest and straightforward with you for the entire time I have known you and yet you refuse me this small request. This is why I cannot help you.

I could go see Ms. Graham today and get this all finished. I have the time and I have the money, but I can't do it if you're not going to cooperate. I still strongly recommend that you find someone else to help you with it, and I recommend you do it quickly.

Let me know how it turns out.

Your friend,
Lewd



Anet Graham

Thu, 9 Feb 2006

Attention Lewd Noogie

We have a power of attorney issued to the management of goffin group by your partner mandating us to release the consignment to you.

In the light of the above therefore you are requested to issue when you are prepared to visit our vault for collection but before then you should confirm that you are ready to pay the required fee as earlier informed you in our previous mail.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms. Graham,
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

February 9, 2006

Felix,

I got another note from the bank today. I just want to tell you again that you need to get your thumb out and get your money out of there. Withdraw that power of attorney, move your money back to Ivory Coast and start looking for someone else to help you.

You worry me, Felix. You're going to keep dicking around and lose this money.

Lewd



Lewd Noogie

February 15, 2006

Felix,

How's it going my friend? Have you done anything yet with your money?

I'm almost finished here in Amsterdam, outta here in a couple days. It'll be good to get back to Russia; too many fun things going on here and I'm worn out. You ought to try to come here some day.

Let me know how you're doing.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 22 Feb

dear lewd?

how are you to day, is long time, i want to remind you that the money is still in the bank at belgiun, you still have chance to contacts them again and instruct the bank to transfered the money into your accounts in your country,

thank and remain blessed,

Yours Sincerely,
Felix



Lewd Noogie

February 23, 2006

Felix, my friend, how good to hear from you. How is everything with you? I was just about to write to you to see how things are going and to see if you had found another partner. It sounds like you haven't. Felix, I'm afraid I can't help you with this as much as I would like to and we both know why. As I have told you many times before I don't believe you are sincere about your change of lifestyle and I don't see any real interest from you in retrieving this money and coming to live in Russia. I don't like to be harsh with you my young friend, but you really need to take some initiative here to claim your father's money. If your father knew how you had someone who was ready and willing to help you and you blew it over something as simple as a picture, he'd be spinning in his grave like a lathe.

Look, I don't know how you originally found me but the best advice I can give you is to try and find someone else the same way. I'm sure there are all kinds of people out there who would be willing to help a bright young lad like yourself.

I have grown fond of you in the short time I've known you and I am very interested in how this all turns out. Please do stay in touch.

Your friend,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Sat, 25 Feb 2006

DEAR LEWD

, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR GOOD ADVICA TOWARDS THIS VERY TRANSACTION, THAT MEAN A GOOD MARK TO YOU,BUT MY ONLY PROBLEM IS THAT YOU DID NOT UNDERSTAND ME, UPON ALL THE HALL THING I TELL YOU THAT I HAVE D ALREADY CHANGE YOU STILL PERSIST THAT IS MY ANIOSE IN YOU,

MEAN WHILE I WILL LIKE YOU TO FIND SOME ONE IN YOUR COUNTRY WHICH I HAVED ALREDY CHOOSING BY MY SELF FOR LIVING RIGHT FROM MY CHILD HOOD, WHO IS WELL TRUSTY LIKE YOU? TO VEOLINTER HIM SELF FOR THIS VERY TRANSACTION,

PLEASE I WILL LIKE TO HEAR FROM YOU VERY SOON

YOUR SINCERELY
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

February 25, 2006

Felix, my friend, of course I have already asked all my friends if they would be willing to assist you but they are all like me. None of them want to have someone around who is praying all the time and holding bible sessions at all hours. This is Russia, Felix. We're all party people here, hard working and hard playing.

No, you need to find someone of the same religious bent as yourself.

It's sad that the only thing that stood between us is something as simple as a picture. I'll keep asking around if there's somone who wants to help you but I wouldn't count on it.

Lewd



[We've passed the 6-month mark. Every time I think I've heard the last of Felix he pops up again...]


Felix Dunga

Tue, 7 Mar 2006

DEAR LEWD

WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME AGIAN ,WHY YOU DONT' WANT TO HELP ME

FELIX



Lewd Noogie

March 7, 2006

Felix, my young friend, so good to hear from you! How is everything?

Judging from the tone of your letter you haven't done anything about your money, correct? Felix, when are you going to learn?

Felix, I would really enjoy having you here. There's some kind of party every night in the hotel and the Russian women are among the most beautiful in the world! I just can't tell you how great it is. But I'm pretty sure you wouldn't like it very much. There hasn't been a prayer heard in these parts since Nikon was thrown out and there's not a pastor for 2 hundred miles. It just wouldn't work out, my friend.

Nothing makes me sadder. I really wanted to help you.

Please stay in touch and let me know how you're doing.

Lewd



[Normally I would drop this but getting this picture out of Felix has become a QUEST!]

Lewd Noogie

March 7, 2006

Felix,

I understand that you are a young, hard-headed boy, but I'm going to try one more time.

I understand that you don't realize how much money you have; it just doesn't register in a mind as young as yours. Please understand that, as much as I want and am ready to help you, I can only do it if I am convinced that our personal relationship will not fail if you were to come here.

Felix, what I have asked you to do is quite simple. Just tell me, in plain English, why you refuse.

Your friend,
Lewd



Felix Dunga

Wed, 8 Mar 2006

DEAR LEWD

I CAN NOT PRAY AGAIN? I NOT PREY, JUST ASSIST ME TRY AND SEE

felix



Lewd Noogie

March 8, 2006

Felix,

I am ready to help you. Just send me the picture I asked you for and we'll get you here with your father's money.

Lewd



Felix Dunga

Fri, 10 Mar 2006

DEAR LEWD

THANK YOU FOR YOUR RESPONS, MEAN WHYLE IF YOU REALY WANTED TO HELP IN THIS TRANSACTION YOU WOULDT' HAVED ASKING ALL THIS CONCERNING THE PICTURE, IT MEANS NOTTING IN THE AREA OF ANY TRANSACTION,AND NOTING CAN MAKE ME TO SEND TO YOU THE PHOTO YOU NEED WERE I AM WITH WOMEN OR HOLDING DRINK IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO ME

TO VERIFYING YOU WELL IF AT ALL I DO THAT IT WILL PUBLISH IN NEWS PAPERS AND MAGESINS EVEN IN THE INTERNET, ON LESS YOU NEED MY NORMAL PHOTO OFF WHICH I HAVED SEND TO YOU LAST TIME

SO IF YOU INTRESTED YOU CAN CONTACTS THE CORRESPONDING BANK IN BELGIUM

THANK
FELIX



Lewd Noogie

March 11, 2006

What is all this crap about newspapers and magazines and internet? Are you kidding me? You think anybody but me is that interested in you? Give me a break Felix. You don't want to send me the picture because you're too religious to have that kind of photo taken and THAT'S why this thing will never work.

That picture has EVERYTHING to do with this transaction. I could have you and your money here in a week but there's no way I'm going to bring you here knowing that you haven't changed a bit since the day we met.

Sorry, friend.
Lewd



[Uh-oh. My email to Felix bounces...]


Anet Graham

Mon, 13 Mar 2006

Attention Mr Lewd Noogie

Find attached herein the power of attorney that is in our position.

Therefore arrange for the immediate collection of the consignment without fail.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For the Management



Lewd Noogie

March 14, 2006

Ms. Graham,

Much to my sadness, Mr. Dunga has decided to disolve our partnership. I will therefore no longer be involved in this transaction. I'm very sorry for your trouble.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Mon, 20 Mar 2006

Attention: Lewd Noogie

The management of Goffin Group met today March 21, 2006 and resolve thus. That your mail of March 14,.2006 wherein you said that your partner who issued you power of attorney has withdrawn it, is arrangement is not in order and are not standard of transaction of this nature, neither has he informed us accordingly.

We therefore request that with the power of attorney in our hands as valid you are advised to come up immediately for signing and collection of the consignment in our vault.

Please acknowledge the receipt of this information and advise us accordingly.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms. Graham
For the management



Lewd Noogie

March 21, 2006

Ms. Graham,

As I mentioned to you in my previous email, Mr. Dunga has declined to fulfill certain conditions of our partnership and said partnership has therefor been dissolved. I will contact him and request that he void the power of attorney in your possession.

Sorry for your trouble.

Lewis D.. Noogie



Lewd Noogie

March 21, 2006

Felix,

How's everything going Felix? I see you haven't done anything about your money yet.

I have had a couple of notices from Anet Graham at Goffin Group that you need to void the power of attorney that you gave them and make arrangements to do something with your money.

I think you are foolish to leave it where it is. It is not doing anything for you and you could be making more money if you put it to work. I know you won't take my advice on this but if you're not careful you're going to lose this money.

Write some time.
Lewd



Anet Graham

March 30, 2006

Attention Lewd Noogie

We are jet to hear from your partner inrespect of the power of attorney.

Please advise us in this regard .

Thanks
Management
Goffin GROUP Belgium



Lewd Noogie

March 31, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I'm sorry but my hands are tied. Mr. Dunga is no longer my partner and he no longer wants my involvement. I sent him a note telling him that he needs to take action on his deposit with you but the email bounced. It appears that his email address is no longer valid and he has disappeared.

Mr. Dunga is young and inexperienced in handling money. I'm sure his funds are safe with you and I'm sure he will eventually show up to claim them.

Sincerely,
Lewis Noogie



Anet Graham

Thu, 6 Apr 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie
Ref Power of attorney

There are stands in handling program of this nature, since we will not promise to be keeping the consignment longer than necessary we advise strongly that you claim and keep your contact with us whenever Mr. Dunga visit we will definitely harmonize the matter as a due process.

Advise us in this regard.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms. Graham For Goffin Management



Lewd Noogie

April 7, 2006

Ms. Graham,

While I am no longer Mr. Dunga's partner I do want to watch out for his interests. I don't understand your statement that you, "...will not promise to be keeping the consignment longer than necessary". You are responsible for holding the consignment for as long as Mr. Dunga chooses unless you have a written agreement with him that limits the duration of your company's participation.

I assume you are in communication with Mr. Dunga and are keeping him appraised of your position.

Lewis D. Noogie



Lewd Noogie

April 22, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I have tried to contact Mr. Dunga a number of times to encourage him to make arrangements for the disposition of his deposit with your firm but I have been unsuccessful. I would hate to think that his youthful hardheadedness might cause him financial difficulties.

Have you been in contact with Mr. Dunga?

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Tue, 25 Apr 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

Your mail dated April 21, 2006, was received and passed to the management during their Board meeting and they resolve as Follows.

That since the grantor as a beneficiary/trustee issued power of attorney to you; you have 100% right to claim the consignment for safe keeping for Mr. Dunga.

In the light of the above, therefore will have ask you to come forward with good means of identification for collection of the consignment.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group NV



Lewd Noogie

April 28, 2006

Ms. Graham,

As I have told you several times in the past Mr. Dunga and I are no longer partners and he has not responded to my attempts to contact him. It would be highly unethical for me to claim his money under these conditions unless I were to find out that he was deceased.. I have been very worried about him and I'm concerned that he may have fallen prey to the same persons who caused his father's demise.

Unless he contacts me or someone lets me know that he is deceased I'm afraid my hands are tied in the matter.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Mon, 08 May 2006

X-Originating-IP: [205.158.62.67]
Return-Path: <barristerkola@mail.com>

Attention Mr. Lewis D. Noogie

For your information and necessary action I am an attorney to MR Dunga and Goffin GROUP Netherlands advised you and me to inform you that my client is late are authorized by law finalise the outstanding transaction with them, bearing in mind that I issued the power of attorney to you.

Acknowledge the receipt of this information to enable me issue the necessary documents for easy collection of the consignment from Goffin Group NV.

Thanks
Yours in service
Barrister Kola Martins



Lewd Noogie

May 8, 2006

Barrister Martins,

I'm pleased to find out that Felix has retained an attorney but I'm somewhat confused by your referrence to him as 'late'. Late for what? Has something happened to Felix? Please, I consider Felix a close but somewhat misguided friend; if anything has happened to him I would like very much to know.

Please respond as soon as possible.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Tue, 09 May 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

We wish to inform you that Mr. Felix Dunga is late he died by ghastly motor accident, that was the reason why Goffin Group Netherlands asked me as the attorney to inform you accordingly.

We were advise by GOFFIN GROUP to issue the death certificate to enable finalise the transaction they have with both of you.

Therefore we will arrange the certificate very soon for you.

Thanks
Barrister Kola Martins



[Overwhelmed by sadness at the news of Felix's demise, I put my grief aside and decide to press on to claim his millions...]

Lewd Noogie

May 9, 2006

Mr. Martins,

I am very saddened by the news you bring me. I considered Felix, hammer-headed youth that he was, as a very close friend. I know he would want me to proceed in securing his fortune. I intend to set up a substantial financial studies scholarship at a prestigious university in his name with part of his funds.

Please be so kind as to forward a copy of his death certificate as soon as possible. I would also like to know where you are located in the event I require the services of an attorney to complete the transaction with Goffin Group.

Let me also say I deeply appreciate you letting me know about Felix.

Sincerely,

Lewis D. Noogie



we pick things up in june...

Death has not slowed the Lads down. Enter "Peter Dunga", the Reincarnation of Felix as His Younger Brother.

Lewd Noogie

May 20, 2006

Barrister Martins,

I was hoping to have heard something from you by now regarding Felix's death certificate. As he is no longer with us I have decided to pursue claiming his estate with Goffin Group.

I would still very much appreciate your advice in this matter.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Sat, 20 May 2006

sir

Please I will definitely keep you posted as soon as I receive the certificate.

However I will definitely get by Tuesday next week without failand I will advise you on the way forward.

Thanks

Yours in service
Barrister KOLA Martins



[I still want a picture but, alas, Felix is gone . I wonder if he can be reincarnated as a younger brother. Just so you don't have to go all the way back to the beginning to check the facts, Felix never mentioned a younger brother...]

Lewd Noogie

May 20, 2006

Barrister Martins,

Thank you very much for your prompt reply regarding Felix's death certificate. I will expect it on or about Tuesday of next week.

I want to see if maybe you can help me with something - when I was first getting to know Felix he mentioned to me that he had a younger brother and I believe he said he was about 18 years old. I also think he said his name was Peter Dunga but I'm not sure I remember that correctly.

I desparately wanted to help Felix find a better life but I felt he was being dishonest with me about some aspects of his life. The thought of his young brother being on his own has been disturbing me since I learned of Felix's death. Is there some way you could have him contact me? I would be most grateful for any assistance you can provide.

Yours sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Lewd Noogie

May 24, 2006

Barrister Martins,

I was hoping to hear from you yesterday. I appreciate that you are a busy person but I would like to expedite this a bit.

Have you contacted Felix's brother yet?

Thank you.
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Wed, 24 May 2006

Attention Lewis D. Noogie

Find attached herein the death certificate for your perusal and necessary action.

For your information, we are the members of panel on Economic reforms in my country; therefore I am very busy now to find out were the junior brother of Felix is at.

Make use of this information to follow up your claims and give me time to furnish with more information in that regard.

Thanks
Yours in service
Barrister Kola Martins


[Yep, Felix is kaput and the death certificate proves it...]


Lewd Noogie

May 25, 2006

Barrister Martins,

I thank you for the copy of Felix's death certificate.

I hesitate to proceed any further on this until I am able to locate Felix's brother. I realize that claiming Felix's money would not be an honest thing to do as long as his younger brother is out there somewhere by himself. After all he is Felix's true next-of-kin. Being the man of integrity that you are I'm sure you understand my position.

I am fully aware that a man in your position has many things to deal with in his normal work day but any attention you can give to informing Peter (I think that's his name) that I'm looking for him would be tremendously appreciated. Just send me his email address or have him contact me.

Many thanks.
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Thu, 25 May 2006

Attention Lewis D. Noogie

If getting Peter will be the best option, I will contact in the next few weeks. But for the betterment of the transaction you need to open up communication with Goffin Group immediately before you conclude with the negotiation I will either ask him to contact you or give you his contact details.

Thanks

Yours in service
Barrister Kola Martins



[Time to re-establish my relationship with Ms. Graham...]

Lewd Noogie

May 26, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I want to inform you that I have decided to pursue my late partner's (Felix Dunga) estate that is currently being held in your establishment.

I will be contacting you with more details as soon as I am able to contact my late partner's younger brother. As he is the true next of kin I feel it important that he have a say in how we proceed.

Please acknowledge receipt of this and I hope to be contacting you soon.

Sincerely, Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Fri, 26 May 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, with content understood. We wish to inform you that we are not aware of any next of Kin in this issue other than you, because in our Memoranda of understanding reached before the deposit, was that upon your presentation of Power of attorney with payment slip of the demurrage charge, then the consignment will be released to you without further delay.

Confirm that you are on position of the aforementioned information then we will proceed.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms. Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

May 26, 2005

Ms. Graham,

I am aware that I have power of attorney in this transaction but Mr. Dunga does have a younger brother who needs to be aware of what is happening with his deceased brother's estate. I'm sure you understand that it would be unethical of me to proceed without his knowledge.

I merely wanted to inform you that as soon as I have contacted Peter Dunga I will be approaching you again to claim the part Felix's estate that you hold. I would like to have an update on any outstanding charges that we may be required to pay.

Thank you,
Lewis D. Noogie



Lewd Noogie

May 31, 2006

Barrister Martins,

I am writing to inquire as to whether or not you have contacted Felix Dunga's younger brother Peter. I would very much like to get things moving but I need Peter's consent on the next steps to be taken. I am also concerned about his well-being and would like to be sure he's being cared for.

Any sense of urgency you can impart to getting him to contact me is greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Barrister Kola Martins

Sat, 03 Jun 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

For your information, we will not be wasting our precious time in change of mail with you than the real action.

In the light of the above therefore, you are advised to follow up the collection of the consignment with the company in Belgium until such a time I will send a delegation to fetch your little friend out.

Most importantly, if you have the funds in your hands you can arrange to visit Africa and collect to Europe as partners, bearing in mind that going after him will cost some money.

As I said in my last mail, that I will be highly interested to hear good news for the collection of the consignment for the company, which will be a new development in this regard.

Thanks

Yours in Service
Barrister Kola Martins



Lewd Noogie

Mr. Martins,

I'm sorry to hear that you consider exchange of mail with me as a 'waste of you precious time'. It did not seem that I was asking you to overexert yourself by asking you to have Peter Dunga contact me.

As I cannot in good conscience collect Felix's estate without his younger brother's knowledge and you don't want to waste your precious time to ask him to contact me, I will trouble you no longer.

I would point out that your refusal to contact Peter Dunga, Felix's rightful next of kin, is preventing him from pursuing a better life and I find this to be highly unethical of you.

I thank you for your assistance to date.

Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Mon, 5 Jun 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie
GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail and the content understood.

Since you have decided to visit for the collection of your consignment, it is our pleasure to inform you that our vault is in Netherlands and we will deliver to you there, this will be upon the presentation of the required identification.

Apparently we wish to inform you that you are to make the following payment upon arrival before the transaction will be released.

Terminal charges 2100 euro
Demurrage fee 3997 euro
Administrative charges 2779
Vat 10% 887.6
Grand total 9763.6

This was you bank co-ordinate, please ascertain it.

Name Mr Lewd Noogie
Bank Name: MultiBanka City: Estonia Branch Country: Latvia
Swift Code: MULTLV3Y
Beneficiary: DLN Associates LLC

Please confirm the receipt of the mail and your arrival date but before your arrival to enable us send our form A for your completion and you will return it back with dispatch.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewd Noogie

June 6, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I appreciate your responding to me in a timely manner but I'm afraid this has all been for naught. I cannot in good conscience claim the estate of my late partner Mr. Dunga knowing that younger brother is his true next of kin is alive. I requested the assistance of Mr. Dunga's attorney in finding Felix's younger brother but I have not received much cooperation from him.

Please refrain from proceeding any further with this. If I should be contacted by Mr. Dunga's relative I will contact you immediately to conclude the transaction.

I thank you for your time and effort. You have always been very helpful and I hope to talk with you again soon.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



[Peter Dunga exists!!!]

Peter Dunga

Thu, 8 Jun 2006

Dear sir,

The attorney to our family, has come to bring me from the village to know why you need my attention.He told me that you are the partner to my late senior brother.

Please let me have your telephone number.

Thanks
Peter Dunga Jr



Lewd Noogie

June 9, 2006

Peter, so good to finally hear from you! Let me say first that I am so sorry about your brother Felix's premature death. I liked him very much and considered him to be a close friend. I was so saddened that things didn't work out between us and in a small way I feel responsible for his death. If he had been here he might still be with us.

Felix did not tell me anything about you, only that he had a younger brother. Please tell me a little about yourself - are you in school? What do you study? How old are you? Does Felix have any other surviving relatives? Who has been taking care of you?

I don't know how much Felix told you about the money your father left to the two of you, but you are a very rich man. We have to decide the best way to go about recovering these funds so that you can start living a better life.

I have many things to tell you but we have time to get to know one another. My number here is (095) xxx-xxxx. Please call or write anytime.

Sincerely,
Lewd



Barrister Kola Martins

Thu, 08 Jun 2006

Attention Lewis D. Noogie

For your information i have Masster Peter Dunga junior in my chambers now, because we do have your telephone no.

We have open yahoo mail for him. He will be assisted by the chambers secretray to send a mail.

Thanks
Yours in service
Barrister Kola Martins



Lewd Noogie

June 9, 2006

Mr. Martins,
I want to thank you so much for finding Peter for me! I breathed a tremendous sigh of relief when I found his email this morning. I have every hope of succeeding with Peter where I failed with Felix and you, sir, have made it all possible. Again, many thanks to you.
I will work with Peter to recover his inheritance. Should we require the services of an attorney I hope that we can feel free to call on you.
Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie


[Definitely more to come!]

[And there was! Here it is: ]

Peter Dunga

Fri, 9 Jun 2006

To Mr Lewd Noogie

Thanks for the information, I am a student of university of lome and I am studding chemical engineering ,.but do to the death of my senior brother Felix I was return to live with one of our relation who is residing in Cotonue Republic of Benin.. Our parents hard only both my self and Felix.

For the funds left by our father, Felix told me that he was working with a foreign partner to invest on the funds and ask me to have patient until he conclude his arrangement before taken me out to Europe for final settlement. Now I am not attending lecture because of fees.

Whichever way you wish to go about, I will like you to make it fast for to return back to school or meet you over there in Europe to continue my studiers.

God will guide and protect you for been so nice and open to me.

Thanks
Regards
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 9, 2006

Peter, my young friend, good to hear from you again. We have so much to discuss.

I'm very happy to hear that you study engineering. I myself received an engineering degree from a very prestigious correspondence university in Guatemala. It is one of my favorite degrees, although I don't have much use for it as an international hotel consultant. We also have excellent engineering schools here in Russia and I would like you to consider completing your education here.

The first thing I want you to understand is that I want to help you as I wanted to help your brother Felix. If you let me handle the money end of it we can do this very quickly. I want you to keep in mind that I was given power-of-attorney from Felix and that I could have gone and claimed your money anytime after Felix died. Actually I could have even done it before he died, but I didn't. That money is legally yours and I'm going to help you get it. I have an excellent working relationship with Anet Graham with Goffin Group in Belgium where your money is being held.

If you follow my advice we'll get through this in no time.

Tell me what you think about what I said.

Your friend,
Lewd



Peter Dunga

Sat, 10 Jun 2006

Thanks once again for been so nice, good in his infinite mercy will also visit your family.

Whatever arrangement you are doing is OK by me, you will be in a better position to collect and invest the funds on my behalf. With you mail I know you are a child of God, to him be the glory.

Your suggestion that I will complete in your country is acceptable to me. Please honor the power of attorney; I will give any support you may require from me.

The family law has advice me to accept you as my senior brother.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Mr Peter Dunga Jnr



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

Peter,

I am well and truly honored to hear that you consider me your senior brother. I know Felix is looking up at us now and I'm sure he's pleased.

It is also good that you agree with me taking the lead on recovering your inheritance. Everything is in place with Goffin Group and I just have to make arrangements to make a trip back to Amsterdam to pick it up. I'll start trying to work a trip into my schedule and I'll let you know when I can get there.

The best part is knowing that you want to come here to complete your education. I had a lot of arrangements made for Felix that you will be able to make use of.

Forgive me for asking, Peter, but are you a religious person?

Your brother,
Lewd



Peter Dunga

Mon, 12 Jun 2006

Thank God that you are my next senor brother, with God all things are possible. I am a believer in christ JESUS.

why i will wait for the update

BEST REGARD
PETER



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 12, 2006

Peter, my young brother, I guess I owe you an apology but I wnat to explain this so you'll understand.

When I first became aquainted with Felix I was concerned that our lifestyles would be too incompatible for us to be able to live together. Felix was also religious and I tried to show him how to grow into a well-adjusted man. He told me he had changed but he was unwilling to prove it to me. I guess I suspected all along that he hadn't really changed at all.

Peter, I don't think it will work out between you and I either. If you came here you would no doubt want to spend all your time with some pastor talking about Sodomites and stuff like that. I'm sorry my friend, it just wouldn't work. I live life in the fast lane, on the edge, and once in awhile over the edge.

I will write to Goffin Group and relinquish my power of attorney over your inheritance. The way will be open for you to claim what is rigthfully yours. I truly wish you the best of luck and please stay in touch to let me know how everything goes.

Your brother,
Lewd



[These Dungas are gluttons for punishment...]

Peter Dunga

Tue, 13 Jun 2006

We are to remain one and part no more.

If you regard me as your junior brother you should be able to advice me on the right track, whatever that is your wish will be the best for me and as a child of God will obey and respect you.

Accept to finalise as I am in total confusion will not know what next to do.

Thanks
Best regard
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 14, 2006

Peter,

I have given this a lot of thought and, against my better judgement, I'm going to try and help you. If you'll do as I tell you I think you'll develop into a happy, well-adjusted young man.

I need for you to give me an idea as to what kind of life-experience you have. For example, do you have a girlfriend? Have you EVER had a girlfriend? Do you smoke? Drink? Do you go to clubs?

I'll try to find time today to write to Ms. Graham at Goffin Group and start making arrangements to get your money. While I'm working on that you write back with the answers to my questions. We'll get this thing moving.

Your brother,
Lewd



Peter Dunga

Thu, 15 Jun 2006

Thanks for you mail, I have a girlfriend, I Do not smoke nor Drink? I go to clubs,

Thanks
Sincerely yours
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 18, 2006

Peter, my friend,

Sorry it took so long to get back to you but it's been a very busy week here at the hotel.

Well, It sounds like I have better material to work with in you than I had with your brother. So, you have a girlfriend and you like clubs. This is good news indeed.

Ok, as a first step to get you in better shape, I want you to try smoking. Cigarette or cigar, your choice. Just try it and let me know how you like it.

I don't know how much you know about Russia but I think you're going to like it here. Beautiful scenery, great people and beautiful women. Speaking of which, I have a girl to introduce you to once you get here. Her name is Oxnard and she's the sister of the East German massage therapist who works here at the hotel. More about her later.

I wrote to Ms. Graham at Goffin Group to let her know I'll be arranging a trip there once you and I get the details of your arrival worked out.

Expecting to hear from you.
Lewd



Peter Dunga

Mon, 19 Jun 2006

I got your, with the understanding, as you have advised I will try to smoke and have a feeling about it, to make you happy because any thing you ask me to do I will definitely obey.

How do you intend to arrange my travel to meet you? You know the situation about finance with me and visa program. I am delighted about the girl friend you have already found for me in advance; please send my profound gratitude to her.

Handle the inherited finance collection with dispatch

Best Regards.
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 19, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I am pleased to tell you that I am in contact with the younger brother of the late Mr. Felix Dunga and we are working out the details on the best way to recover his brother's estate. I will be making arrangements to come to Amsterdam to visit your offices in the near future and will notify you when we have established a firm date.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 22, 2006

Peter, I haven't heard from you lately. Is anything wrong?

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Fri, 23 Jun 2006

Sorry my brother, I went to the country side to see my grand mum,

What is really happening? And what about my darling, since you told me about, I have gotten different dream. Have the issue straighten with the company in Europe?

Do all you can to bring me over to stay with you.

Have a nice weekend and remain blessed.

Best Regards
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 23, 2006

Peter, good to hear from you. I hope you found your grandmother in good health. I hope you didn't tell her that you are smoking now, sometimes grandparents don't understand these things.

Ok, the next thing I want you to do is pick up a six-pack of beer tonight and drink all six. We'll work on increasing the quantity as we go but we'll start out small. Let me know how you feel after six beers.

I've contacted Goffin Group and will let you know when I hear from them. I'm trying to work a trip to Amsterdam in the next two weeks and I'll let you know when I have a firm date.

Speaking of the girl I've got for you here, I've never seen her as excited! I have to warn you, when Oxnard gets excited about a man she's as dangerous as a moose in heat. Being as she is a bit on the stout side I want to be sure you don't have any kind of heart problem that might be agravated by hard physical exertion. She'll hurt you if you're not in shape.

Ok, my young brother, let me know how you like the beer.

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Sat, 24 Jun 2006

Dear Brother Lewd Noogie ,

Thanks for your mail. As I have said that I believe much in you and I will try that beer but for a start three in order

Remain blessed and have a nice weekend.

Best Regards
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 26,2006

Peter,

I'm proud of you and I think this is going to work out very well for the two of us. Let me know how you like beer, I'm anxious to find out.

I have to make a trip to Irkustsk and I won't be back here until Wednesday night. I'll write to you then or early Thursday.

Good work!
Lewd



[Apparently Peter overdid it. This is what happens when you give the kids the key to the liquor cabinet...]

Barrister Kola Martins

Tue, 27 Jun 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

Your friend Mr. Peter has been hospitalized here in Togo, reasons that he took excess alcohol, the doctors are work to return him back to normal.

We are afraid with the family; please do all you can to move him to Europe for change of ideal and character.

What is the update with goffin group Belgium? Keep me posted.

Thanks
Yours in service
Barrister Kola Martins



Anet Graham

Tue, 27 Jun 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, wherein you confirm of been in contact with Mr. Felix Dunga last brother.

For your information and necessary action, we have procedure in handling transaction of this nature beside the financial law will not allow any person to move about in Europe with sum above five thousand euro.

Therefore, before conclude you arrival date for the collection of the consignment you are hereby informed that the demurrage fee has to be paid into the company nominated bank account, upon this payment you are permitted to arrive with the payment slip for the final release of the consignment without fail.

Thanks

Yours truly,
Ms. Graham,
For Goffin Group



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 29, 2006

Whoa, Peter!

I got a letter from Mr. Martins saying that you went on a real bender! You da man, dog! Sounds like you was really gettin' jiggy wit' it!

How are you doing now? Don't worry, you might feel kinda rough for a day or two but this is nothing. I've done this dozens of times. Hell, I can't drink tequila anymore because of a near-death experience I once had with it.

Listen, dude, you're comong HERE! And SOON! I gotta send a letter to Goffin Group tomorrow to straighten them out on a couple of things, but we need to start making plans to get you here. You are gonna THRIVE here!

Get back to me when you're feeling better.

Your brother,
Lewd



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

June 29, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I believe I must have misunderstood your last email You stated that, "...the financial law will not allow any person to move about in Europe with sum above five thousand euro." I have to admit that I have never heard of this particular restriction and I have moved freely through Europe with considerably larger sums.

Please check the current regulations regarding currency import and export and I believe you will find you are mistaken.

I am still working at fitting a trip to Amsterdam into my schedule and I am hopeful that I can be at your offices sometime within the next two weeks.

Thank you.
Lewis D. Noogie



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

July 1, 2006

Peter, are you still out there? I haven't heard from you in awhile, let me know how you're doing.

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Mon, 3 Jul 2006

My Dear Brother,

Thank God that i am out of the hospital.

The story if told will never be good because i was ina total melancholy.

Please let me know the arrangement to come over and be with ypou as no body will believer me over, since, i smoke and drink, therefore just arrange my meeting immediately before i give up the ghost.Now i have my self but still smoking as i have found joy in it.

Very loyal brother.
Best Regards
Peter



[Ok, time to make my move...]

Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

July 4, 2006

Peter,

So good to finally hear from you, you shouldn't wait so long to write.

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better but I knew it was nothing serious. That kind of thing has happened to me more times than I can remember. We all get carried away some times. I have to say I'm quite pleased with your progress and I can't wait to get you here so we can start partying in ernest. This is gonna be so much fun!

I'm trying to postpone some meetings I have next week so that I can get to Amsterdam to finish our business there. I've also been talking to my friend Boris in the Russian Immigration Department to get your visa started. We're very close, my friend, and I think this is all going to come together very quickly.

Peter, as I mentioned before, I have been quite pleased with your progress so far, much more so than I was with Felix's. He claimed he was trying all the things I told him to do but it turned out he wasn't. While you seem much more ernest, I have to remind myself that I'm going to have to turn over almost 9,800 Euros to complete this transaction and get you your money. I have to ask you a small favor, just to be sure that you're truly going to be the kind of person I can live with. I want you send me a picture of yourself, holding a beer and either a cigar or a cigarette, and with your girlfriend sitting on your lap. This might sound silly to you but it's important to me because I don't want to bring you here and find out that you're not at all into this kind of lifestyle. That would be the worst situation for both of us.

Ok, we both have work to do. I have to try and get those meetings cancelled and you have to get that picture to me. Please try and have it here in the next day or two.

So good talking with you again.
Lewd



Peter Dunga

Thu, 6 Jul 2006

Dear Brother, Lewd Noogie

Since after that problem the attorney and my friend has stop to give me money because the believe i have gone way word and i am no more a believer because of this i am cash strapped i can not raise money to take the photograph and since i don"t have girl friend previously to get one to follow me act that will require some cash because Africa girls are shy.

Please you should arrange to give me any thing to enable meet that. Nothing is too small. The money can be sent by western union through my friend in Cotonoue Republic of Benin Mr Joseph Boton.

Thanks and God bless you more.
Sincerely yours
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

July 6, 2006

Peter,

I'm having deja vu here, my friend. These are the same kinds of excuses your brother gave me. I hope I am mistaken about this.

Peter, I'm not asking you for a professional photograph, just have one of your friends to take the picture. And don't give me this horse puckey about African girls being shy 'cause I know better. There are plenty of African girls in Europe and I have to use a stick to keep them at bay.

I've cancelled most of my meetings next week to make the trip to Amsterdam but now you're making me think that was a bad idea. Peter, I gave your brother a number of chances but I'm only giving you one. Get the picture to me this week or I'm out for good. I'm sorry to be so brusque but I've been through all this before.

Let me know your decision.

Lewd



Anet Graham

Thu, 6 Jul 2006

Attention Mr Lewd Noogie

How committed are you over this issue? The board of directors of this company met today and decided to inform you about the unnecessary delay by you to follow the due process of the company and finding out the best way of finalizing the transaction without qualms.

Be informing that, you need to take up an appointment with us before your arrival in Netherlands as the company will not entertain any break of protocol.

Thanks
Mrs. Graham
For Goffin Management



Peter Dunga

Fri, 7 Jul 2006

Attention Lewd Noogie

Let me see what I will do about that, please you need to have patient because I have to source for money and then arrange it.

For the follow up on the investment you need to go ahead as God will definitely reward you. I will come back to you as soon as I fix that.

Have a good weekend and remain blessed/

Sincerely yours
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

July 7, 2006

Peter,

The minute I get the picture I'll be on a plane to Amsterdam the next day. I want to help you, so get this done soon.

Lewd



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

July12, 2006

Peter,

After cancelling several important meetings this week so that I might have time to fly to Amsterdam and conclude this business for you, I find that once again I have been hosed by the Dunga tribe. I presume by your silence that the arrangements between us are concluded.

Trying to help you and your brother Felix has been a thankless task and I fear I can go no further. I have bent over backwards to help the two of you and now all I get is silence. Well, enough is finally enough. I can't be a part of this any longer.

I wish you the best in any further efforts you undertake to recover your brother's estate.

Sincerely,
Lewd



[Seven weeks and nothing from Peter. Nothing is worse than having to chase one's scammer but I still want that picture. I have become the mugu...]

Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

August 30, 2006

Ms. Graham.

I don't know if you remember me, my name is Lewis Noogie and I was assisting one Peter Dunga in claiming his deceased brother's (Felix Dunga) estate.

While we have disolved our partnership I still worry that Peter does not have the knowledge or the incentive to complete the business at hand. I would appreciate very much if you would let me know if Peter Dunga has claimed his brother's estate.

Thank you vey much,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Wed, 30 Aug 2006

Attention: Lewis D. Noogie

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, wherein you are requesting to know if Mr. Peter Dunga has collected the consignment in our vault. We have you name in our file as the beneficiary, therefore nothing has changed it. You may work out the release with us.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms. Graham.



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

August 30, 2006

Ms. Graham,

Thank you very much for your prompt reply.

While I may be indicated in the paperwork as the beneficiary, it is Peter Dunga who the money truly belongs to. Trying to help first Felix and then Peter has been the most exasperating experience of my life. It's been like trying to push a car out of the mud when the driver doesn't care if he moves or not.

Ms. Graham, your patience has truly been the stuff of legend and for that I thank you. I will make one last attempt to get Peter interested in his future and will contact you if I am successful.

Thank you again.
Lewis D. Noogie



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

August 30, 2006

Peter,

I contacted Ms. Graham at Goffin Group earlier today to see if you had recovered your brother's estate. She informs me that there has been no action on your part.

Peter, I hate to be stern with you but I don't see any other way. If you have any concern at all about your future you have got to get off your dead, lazy ass and contact Ms. Graham. I realize that you have no concept of how much money this is but, trust me, it's a lot. It would carry you for the rest of your life and provide you with anything you ever want.

Please show a little initiative for once and get this taken care of. I'll do anything I can to help you but you've got to help yourself as well. You need to act now!

Let me know if you have any interest at all in getting this taken care of.

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Thu, 31 Aug 2006

To Mr. Lewd Noogie:

Thanks for getting in touch, God will bless you. As my senior brother you promised to guide me and on the way you abandoned me because I told you I was cash strapped to what you direct me.

My senior brother told me that he has submitted your name to Goffin Group Belgium as the beneficiary only when you apply for the claim they will seek my consent and I will confirm to them to release it you.

Please start the process of claiming the boxes now and arrange cash for me because life is very difficult in Africa . I wrote goffin today to inform them that we will soon start the claim process and you will come over for the collection.

The attorney has been complaining about your nonchalant attitude to me and advices that I should allow him introduce a new person as the beneficiary I refused.

Have a nice day and remain blessed.

Thanks
Best Regards
Mr. Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 1, 2006

Peter,

While I am extremely pleased to hear from you, I am somewhat distraught at your recollection of events. I did not abandon you, you were the one who stopped corresponding.

Before we go any further I want to make a suggestion to you. Go and talk to your lawyer about what he feels your best course of action is. If he thinks that you should let him introduce you to someone else to help you with your brother's estate then I will gladly step aside. The important thing is that you do SOMETHING, ANYTHING, to get your money. You have procrastinated far too long in getting this done. You complain about how difficult life is in Africa but you have done nothing to help yourself. It has been maddening trying to help first Felix and now you. You can't just sit back and expect someone else to do everything for you. You have to show some effort here.

I only want to see you succeed in life and I'm ready to help you do it. Talk to your lawyer, figure out what you want to do and then get back to me with your final decision.

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Fri, 1 Sep 2006

HAVE NO INTEREST TO TALK TO ANY ATTORNEY YOUR ADVICE AS A SENIOR BROTHER IS FINAL BESIDE HE WILL INTRODUCE AN AFRICA WHO WILL MAKE REMAIN IN AFRICA.

PLEASE BROTHER,TAKE A DECISION AND KEEP ME POSTED I WILL DEFINITELY ADOPT IT.

ASSIST ME FINANCIALLY NOW, GOD WILL BLESS YOU.

THANKS
BEST REGARD.
PETER



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 2, 2006

Peter,

I was so glad to read your response and I can't tell you how pleased I am. You've made the right decision, my friend. I am so looking forward to bringing you here to Russia.

That said, I want you to think about a few things - you realize you will be coming to Russia, yes? It's a great place and it offers so much, but it is very different from what you are used to. We have some extremes in weather, from very hot to very cold. The food is not what you are familiar with. The customs are different. We're looking at some real culture shock here.

But the people are friendly, the vodka cold, and the women beautiful. And by the way, Oxnard is beside herself at the possibility of you coming here. In all honesty, I've never seen her this excited about anything.

So I want you to think this over and be absolutely sure of what you're doing before either of us make any further commitment. If you are sure you want to come here I can promise you a great adventure but I need to know that you are willing to take this chance.

Think about it and if your final answer is positive I will contact Goffin Group and make arrangements to have your brother's estate waiting for you when you arrive.

Lewd



Peter Dunga

Mon, 4 Sep 2006

Thanks a gain brother for your understanding mail, as you are given me hope without any financial support, its working like rubber stamp because I have told you several time that I am cash strapped. Beside I confide in you and will take any advice you give because I will definitely wish to come over to Russia .

Please contact Goffin and conclude with them I am here to give you the necessary support you need. Whatever is the out come of your communication with Goffin dont fail to keep me posted.

Have a nice working week and remain blessed.

Sincerely yours
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 4, 2006

Peter,

I'm not sure I understand what you mean about financial support. I'm more than happy to help you out but I have no idea how to get money to you. I'm also going to have to pay a considerable amount to Goffin Group to enable you to recover your brother's estate. If that's not financial support, I don't know what is.

I'll get a note off to Ms. Graham either tonight or first thing tomorrow to find out what their charges are going to be. I'll let you know as soon as I hear something back from her.

Lewd



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 5, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I'm happy to say I am back in touch with peter Dunga and we have decided to move ahead with recovering his deceased brother Felix's estate. Please send me a breakdown of the current charges.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Tue, 5 Sep 2006

Attention Mr. Lewd Noogie

GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail and the content understood.

Since you have decided to visit for the collection of your consignment, it is our pleasure to inform you that our vault is in Netherlands and we will deliver to you there, this will be upon the presentation of the required identification.

Apparently we wish to inform you that you are to make the following payment into our nominated bank account co-ordinate before your depature. Then upon arrival it will be used for your release order. Your charges still remain the same.

Terminal charges 2100 euro
Demurrage fee 3997 euro
Administrative charges 2779
Vat 10% 887.6
Grand total 9763.6

Please confirm the receipt of the mail and your arrival date but before your arrival to enable us send our form A for your completion and you will return it back with dispatch.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 6, 2006

Ms. Graham,

I thank you for your prompt response to my inquiry.

You indicate that it is necessary for me to make payment into your firm's account before my arrival. I do not, however, have the information for that account. Please forward to me as soon as possible.

Dincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Anet Graham

Wed, 6 Sep 2006

Attention: Mr. Lewd Noogie
GG/LN/BE.NL/1/2006

We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, wherein you have told us to issue without delay the receiving bank account for the demurrage fee.

Find attached herein the bank details for your necessary action

LAIKI BANK NERYTHREA BRANCH
63EL.VENIZELOU STREET. 146 71 NERYTHREA ATHENS GREECE
SWIFT CODE ; EPPB GRAA.
FAVOR ;POGLEN CONTRACT SERVICES LIMITED
A/C NO ; GR2803100050000005082128150.

The company has decided to use this bank because of the unnecessary tax in Belgium banks. Confirm the payment immediately its done to enable us issue the release order and give youre a date to visit our vault of signing and collection.

Thanks
Yours truly,
Ms Graham
For Goffin Group



Peter Dunga

Wed, 6 Sep 2006

Thanks for your mail brother, I know you are in the process of making me a great person I will wait with patient until you conclude with goffin and ask me to join you in Russia .

Whatever is your discussion? With them you need to keep me posted/

God will bless you and success will be ours.

Sincerely yours
Peter



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 7, 2006

Peter,

I have heard from Ms. Graham at Goffin Group and everything is in place to get your money. I have to send them 9,800 Euros before I make the trip to the Netherlands and it looks like I'll have the time early next week. It occurred to me that I don't have their office address so I have to get that from them before I go.

I talked to a friend of mine in Russian Immigration and he has agreed to expedite your visa. There may be some paperwork for you to fill out but it will be minimal. You did not respond to my question - you do have a valid passport, yes?

Ok, it looks like it's a go. If you have any reservations about coming here be sure and let me know now before I make the final arrangements.

Looking forward to seeing you here.

Lewd



Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 7, 2006

Ms. Grahahm,

It occurrs to me that I don't have the address or phone number for your Netherlands office and I will need to contact you upon my arrival there. Please forward to me at your earliest convenience.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie



Peter Dunga

Fri, 8 Sep 2006

Thank you brother for taken care God will definitely bless you. Nothing on earth will stop me from obeying you and my joy now holds no bound because I am come to stay with loving brothers like you.

As soon as you conclude with them you need to keep me posted,
Have a nice weekend and remain blessed.
Sincerely yours
Peter



[It was one year ago today that I was first contacted by Felix Dunga. I figure the anniversary of the beginning of modalities is an appropriate time to go for the gold.....again...]

Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie

September 9, 2006

Peter, my friend,

I'm happy to say that everything to finish this transaction with Goffin Group is in place. They still have to send me their office phone number and address but I'm expecting it any time now. I'm ready to send them what we owe them in charges. I guess the only thing remaining is for you to make a decision.

When I was working with your brother it was necessary for me to invest almost $3,500 of my own money for hotel living accomodations for a diplomat who never showed up. This was before Felix moved the money to Belgium. Goffin Group has informed me that I must now pay approximately 9,800 Euros, or about $12,000 in charges. I also probably need to send you some money to live in while we're getting everything finalized. I want to be very sure before I throw any more money at this thing.

When I first discovered that your brother was a very religious person I told him it would be best if he found someone else to help him. I explained that I could not function living with someone who sat around praying and meditating all day, talking about things like Samson being swallowed by a whale. When your brother told me he had changed and no longer had any interest in religion, I asked him to send me a picture of himself with a girl sitting on his lap and holding a beer and a cigarette. He refused to do so.

I suppose deep down I knew all along that he was lying when he said he had changed but it was his refusal to send me the picture that confirmed it. He was just too religious a person to be able to do something like that.

I feel more confident with you, but only a little. While Barrister Martins told me that you had indeed tried alcohol to the point of over-consumption, I also asked you for the same picture which you have not provided.

Peter my friend, I cannot take the chance of you coming here and not being able to fit in with the way I live. I don't want to go to all the effort to get you here and then have to send you back because we can't get along. I'm know you understand that I have to be reasonably confident that you're going to be able to adjust to my wild and crazy lifestyle.

So here's the deal - send me a picture of yourself, sitting, with a girl on your lap and a bottle of beer in one hand and a cigarette or cigar in the other. Just have a friend take the picture in your home or a club, it will cost you nothing. Seeing this picture will convince me of your character.

I must warn you - if you give me some bogus excuse like you're afraid the picture will end up in a newspaper or on the internet, our deal is off. Nobody but me is interested in this picture.

If you tell me you don't know anyone with a camera, our deal is off. Everybody owns a camera.

If you tell me you can't find a girl to sit on your lap, our deal is off. You're a rich man, any girl would be happy to sit on your lap for a picture.

Bottom line, if you give me any excuse as to why you can't send me the picture I ask for, I will know you are not sincere and our deal is off.

This is a small thing I ask but it will prove so much to me. Please don't dissappoint me. Send me the picture and your whole life changes. Goffin Group will receive their money the same day I receive the picture. I will send you enough money to live on until we get your brother's estate in hand and I get your Russian visa arranged. Once we get you here with your money, you will live as a wealthy man. You'll have girlfriends, parties, and girlfriends! And parties!

I want you to have a good start in life and I am the guy to give it to you. It's all up to you.

Let me know. Lewd



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