all that glitters is not gold


Hooray! Lewd Noogie is back! In this adventure, he and his alter ego Weiner Crumbley fall for the same imaginary beautiful girl, and Lewd persuades her to come clean.


I've made friends with a scammer.

The Bad Guys:
Melissa Kojo - Ghanian Widow Sitting On a Fortune in Gold
Barrister Pelican Ali - Melissa's Lawyer [we do not make these names up]
Barrister Percy Williams - Pelican's Boss

The Good Guys:
Lewis D. (Lewd) Noogie - International Hotel Consultant
Weiner Crumbley - Chicago-based Bartender

Can Lewd stand by and watch a friend get scammed? Yes, he can.

Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Saturday, 09 January 2010

hello
how are u doing?
BUZZ!!!
are u there?
hello
Lewd Noogie
You still there?
Melissa Kojo
yes
how are u doing?
Lewd Noogie
Do I know you?
Melissa Kojo
yes from person .com
Lewd Noogie
Have we talked before?
Melissa Kojo
no
Lewd Noogie
Oh. Nice meeting you.
Melissa Kojo
thank u
so what is your name
am melissa
Lewd Noogie
Lewis, but my friends call me Lewd
Melissa Kojo
ok
from where?
Lewd Noogie
I'm in Russia.
Melissa Kojo
ok
Lewd Noogie
Where are you?
Melissa Kojo
from ghana
Lewd Noogie
Cool. That's someplace in Asia, right?
Melissa Kojo
no in west africa lol
Lewd Noogie
Oh. My geology is terrible.
Melissa Kojo
yes i can see that
lool
Melissa Kojo:
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Whats up?
Melissa Kojo
cool do u work
Lewd Noogie
Yes. I'm an international hotel consultant.
Melissa Kojo
ok
are u married?
Lewd Noogie
No. I was a few times but they didn't work out.
Melissa Kojo
yes me to i was but now am not
cz mt husband died
Lewd Noogie
Sorry to hear that.
Melissa Kojo
ooo dont worry is life
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I guess.
Melissa Kojo
but i hard no kids with me
Lewd Noogie
You're lucky.
Kids are terrible little creatures and you can catch diseases from them.
Melissa Kojo
how
u where ones a kid
lol I suppose I was but I'm sure I was different.
Melissa Kojo
is that so
u sure?
lol
Lewd Noogie
Pretty sure.
Melissa Kojo
but my husband worked with texaco gold mines in ghana
Lewd Noogie
What was his job?
Melissa Kojo
before he died
he works with ghana gold mines
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, but what did he do there? Was he a miner or driver or a manager?
Melissa Kojo
miner of cz
Lewd Noogie
I see.
Melissa Kojo
he deposited some gold for me at the bank before he died
but the family memebers are insisting i should not be giving the gold cz i had no kids with him so is in their culture
so told my lawer about that
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Well, at least he left you well taken care of. Tell his family to go away and not bother you.
Melissa Kojo
yes he loved me so mach
but the family member
are not giving the chanse BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Hey, it's your money, you can do whatever you want with it. If they bother you, call the police.
Melissa Kojo
in africa is very bad even if u call police they wont du thing about
africa is diffrent
bad leathers as u know
Lewd Noogie
Then buy a large-caliber revolver and the next time one of them comes around, blow his kneecap off. They'll leave you alone after that.
Melissa Kojo
lol
u that cant happed
in africa
is very bad here
Lewd Noogie
So what are you going to do about it?
Melissa Kojo
i told my lawer that i have a forign parthner who worked with him he will help me collect the gold so my lawer was asking for details from the person so am now looking for some one to help collect so i will help him to
Lewd Noogie
But if you already have a partner why are you looking for someone else?
Melissa Kojo
i dont have
just a lawer
Lewd Noogie
So how will you find a partner?
Melissa Kojo
i just want GODto help find a GOD fearing person to help me collect
are u there?
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
I'm back. We have an East German massage therapist working here at the hotel who just had a dispute with one of our American guests and she dislocated his shoulder. It's always something with this woman.
So anyhow, I wouldn't count on god to find you a partner. You need to go on the internet and find a reputable company or bank to transfer your money to.
Melissa Kojo
can u help in that?
i dont know how to that one
for now
Lewd Noogie
Sure. Where do you want to transfer your money to?
Melissa Kojo
no i have gold with the bank not money
Lewd Noogie
Ok, so sell the gold, put the money in your bank account, open another bank account where you want to transfer the money to, and wire it to your new account. Simple.
Melissa Kojo
for now the gold is with bank i need to go to court with my husband family to prove to the court before i can take the gold and for now i have all the document with now to show them so need some bodt to help me in this but it should be forgine parthner so after i can inverse the gold to any forgine country cz africans are bad and gready
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, dear lady, let me explain. He was your husband so that means that everything he owned when he was alive is now yours. It's the same in every country, so there's no need to go to court. Tell your relatives to piss off.
Melissa Kojo
they have sacked
from the house
no but africa is diffrent
u can ask if know some body in africa
that how it os here
so i need to find some now before the week end
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Is this what your lawyer is telling you?
Melissa Kojo
yes please
Lewd Noogie
Then fire your lawyer and find one who knows what he's doing.
Melissa Kojo
if i dont get some one they will give it to them
and i have nothing with me now is last hope in this life
so need to collect
so i setle me life in forgine country
for peace
am now living in a hotel
and now i have less than 50$ with me now
and i dont know what to do so really need for me also help the person
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
You're going to have a hard time finding someone this weekend.
Melissa Kojo
yes this week days
so i really need some ones help
Lewd Noogie
Tell your lawyer to delay the court hearing.
Melissa Kojo
i have been in a hotel for the past 4 month now
Lewd Noogie
Is it a nice hotel?
Melissa Kojo
i having been telling him since but he siad 15th of this month and that this week rite?
no is not
cz i have no mach money
they collect 25$ a day
Lewd Noogie
Bummer!
So where will you go when you have to leave the hotel?
Melissa Kojo
i ave no place to go
cz i need to collect the gold
that my life
and i have been trying to borrow money but i dont get
cz africans are wicked and bad
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, dear, can you hold on for about 10 minutes, please. There's a terrible commotion in the hotel lobby and I have to go see what's going on. I'll be back...
Melissa Kojo
ok
Lewd Noogie
I'm back again, sorry about that. Olga, the East German massage therapist had the American guest on the floor in the lobby and was using a croquet mallet to try and make his skull suitable for use as a flowerpot. I'd fire her if I didn't think she'd come looking for me later.
So, again, what are you going to do?
Melissa Kojo
i dont even no am hopeless now
but the person willing to have send detials about him or her self
and send a copy of passport
with some identificatoin need from him
can u help me or have any ideal about that
Lewd Noogie
The hotel that I'm consulting to is in a very small village in a remote part of the Russian Far East. I don't know anyone here who would be able to help you this weekend. I would, but I never send copies of my id or passport to anyone. It's just not a smart thing to do these days.
Melissa Kojo
ok
Lewd Noogie
So let's talk about more pleasant things - how old are you? What do you look like?
Melissa Kojo
why
Lewd Noogie
why what?
Melissa Kojo
ok am 29 years of age
Lewd Noogie
Nice looking?
Melissa Kojo
and u
so PLEASE BEGGING WITH CAN U HELP ME COLLECT THIS GOLD IN THE NAME OF GOD PLEASE
GOD
IS MY LIFE
Lewd Noogie
I don't know how to help you.
Melissa Kojo
OK CAN U GIVE A GOOD IDEAL
TO NOW
Lewd Noogie
I have no idea how.
Melissa Kojo
am surffering here in africa
i dont even kow how live life in the next days
i will have nothing with me
i have been seeing my pastor about this but says nothing
Lewd Noogie
Hey, I'm surffering here in Gadyukina. Do you have any idea how freakin' cold it gets here? And the only woman I've seen in the past six months is Olga. I'm dying here.
Melissa Kojo
oo please help me
Lewd Noogie
How?
Melissa Kojo
get some one for me
Lewd Noogie
Melissa my love, I told you, I don't know anyone here who could help you.
Melissa Kojo
i will also help if i collect my gold
ooo please try for me
in the name of GOD
HELP ME
MY SISTER
Lewd Noogie
Your sister? You have a sister? Why don't you go live with her?
Melissa Kojo
OK
Lewd Noogie
Does she live far from you?
Melissa Kojo
SHE LIVES WITH HERE HUSBAND AND I CAN GO THERE
Lewd
Lewis Noogie: There! Problem solved.
Melissa Kojo
HOW
Lewd Noogie
How what?
Melissa Kojo
U SIAD PROBLEM SOLVED I SIAD HOW
Lewd Noogie
Now you have a place to live.
Melissa Kojo
no
i dont
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, you're confusing me. You just said your sister lives with her husband and you can go there.
Melissa Kojo
i can go there but cant stay there with her that not possible in ghana here
Lewd Noogie
Why not?
Melissa Kojo
they sleep in only on room on one bed
Lewd Noogie
I'm sure her husband won't mind!!
Melissa Kojo
3 people on one bed
Lewd Noogie
I've done that before and I thought it was great!
Melissa Kojo
with one baby
Lewd Noogie
Oh. That's different. That kinda throws cold water on the whole thing.
Melissa Kojo
how
BUZZ!!!
are u there?
BUZZ!!!
Lewd
I'm back. Olga's busting the place up again
Never mind. Listen, I might know one person who would be willing to help you. His name is Weiner Crumbly and he lives in Chicago in the US. Send him an email (weiner_crumbley@xxxxxxx) and tell him I sent you. If you're attractive, send him a picture, he's a pushover for an attractive woman. He's always ready to help a damsel in distress.
You still there?
I guess you're gone. Well, good luck with getting your gold.
Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa
Sunday, 10 January 2010

hello
how are u doing?
BUZZ!!!
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Good evening. How are you today?
Melissa Kojo
AM FINE BY THE GRACE GOD
how is work today
Lewd Noogie
Busy tonight, but that's typical of this place.
Melissa Kojo
ok
so what u doing now
Lewd Noogie
Finishing up some things I didn't have time to do earlier.
Melissa Kojo
ooo
why u should that is your work u need to do that ealier ok
wont your maneger be mad at u
if u that
Lewd Noogie
No time today, I had to deal with that East German massage therapist I told you about yesterday. My manager won't be mad at me cause I'm the manager.
Melissa Kojo
ok
sorry
Lewd Noogie
No problem.
Melissa Kojo
so howis work today
Lewd Noogie
Like I said, I spent most of the day trying to calm Olga down. Don't get me wrong, she's a beautiful lady, looks a lot like Anna Kournikova, only six inches shorter and 140 pounds heavier. It's just that she's got a very violent temper and I'm trying to work with her on controlling it better.
Melissa Kojo
ok i see
that nice of u
u are a loving sister
Lewd Noogie
Listen, babe, I ain't a sister, I'm a guy. 5' - 3" and 127 pounds of two-fisted, rompin', stompin' hotel consultant.
All male.
Melissa Kojo
ok
sorry
Lewd Noogie
Again, no problem.
Melissa Kojo
are not the one i talk to yesterday?
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I'm the same one.
We talked yesterday.
Melissa Kojo
about my my problem
but u said u are lady or?
Lewd Noogie
No, I never said I was a lady. No way would I ever say that.
Melissa Kojo
ok then sorry ok
Lewd Noogie
Don't worry about it. By the way, did you take my advice and write to Weiner?
Melissa Kojo
who is weiner?
Lewd Noogie
I told you yesterday that he might be able to help you with your situation. I gave you his email address.
Melissa Kojo
oo sorry i did not can i have it agian
Lewd Noogie
Sure. It's weiner_crumbley@xxxxxx.xxx. He's a good friend of mine, likes attractive women, and I suggested that you tell him I sent you. If you are attractive you should send him a picture. That'll get his attention.
Melissa Kojo
ok
thanks u sarch a good friend
GOD will bless u
i love people like u if i get my gold i will try to visit u one day what du say about that
by that time there will money
Lewd Noogie
How much gold do you have and how much is it worth?
You there?
Melissa Kojo
yes
is about 50 pmc of gold
Lewd Noogie
I don't know how much a 'pmc' is.
Approximately how much in US dollars?
Melissa Kojo
and that can cz about 900 hundrend thousand dollars are u there?
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I'm here. $900,000?!? Forget Weiner! Maybe I can help you.
Melissa Kojo
u sure
Lewd
Listen, it's very late here now and I'm exhausted, need to go to bed. Send me an email (L_Noogie@xxxxxxx.com) and tell me what you need me to do.
Melissa Kojo
ok
so whatz the time here
there
Lewd Noogie
It's about 4:00am. I'm only gonna get about 3 hours sleep tonight.
Melissa Kojo
ooo sorry for that
then u need to go to bed now
u will going to work tommorow rite
Lewd Noogie
Of course. Send me the email and I'd like to see a picture, too. Are you nice looking?
Hello?
Melissa Kojo
+233272836965
sorry that amistake writing
ok
Lewd Noogie
You didn't answer my question - are you nice looking?
Melissa Kojo
yes i am i will send u pics tommorow ok
of cz am a nice looking lady
and u?
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I'm great-looking. Ok, maybe not great but small children don't run away screaming when they see me.
Melissa Kojo
lol
but are u sure weiner can offer me that
i really need some one my sister
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, my love, forget Weiner and I'm not your sister.
Melissa Kojo
sorry i always forget ok
please for give for saying that to u ok
Lewd Noogie
You gotta watch that.
Melissa Kojo
is cz of yesterday that why
why should i forget weiner is there a problem
BUZZ!!!
Lewd Noogie
I told you that I'll help you. You're attractive and you're wealthy, just the way I like 'em. It's you & me babe, from now on. Send me that email.
Melissa Kojo
can u be on line for the next one hour so i send u my pics so u see them ok
but for now who will help me
Lewd Noogie
I gotta go to bed. Send me the email and we'll work everything out. Bye for now.
Melissa Kojo
ok
which time tommorow
Lewd Noogie
I don't know. Send me the email.
Melissa Kojo
ok
i will ok
byee sweet dreams
dream about me ok
Lewd Noogie
I certainly will! Good night.
Melissa Kojo
love u
Lewd Noogie
And I'm sure I'm gonna love you.
Melissa Kojo
go to bed now is late ok... i will love u too ok
Melissa Kojo

[Melissa, in true scammer entrepeneurial spirit, goes ahead and contacts Weiner...]

Date: Mon, 11 Jan 2010
Subject: hello weiner is melissa

My Dearly Beloved,

It is by the grace of God that I received Christ,having known the truth, I had no choice than to do what is lawful and right in the sight of God for eternal life and in the sight of man for witness of GodÕs mercy and glory upon my life.

I am Mrs. Melissa Kojo the wife of Mrs. Harry Kojo, my husband worked with the Texaco oil in Ghana for four years before he died in a motor accident early last year.We had no child in this marriage. My Husband died . Before his death we were both born again Christians.

Since his death I have not considered the decition of getting married yet since these are earlytime after his death. When my late husband was alive he deposited trunk boxes of gold with a Bank here in Ghana.Presently, this Gold is still with the Bank and the management just wrote me as the beneficiary to come forward to sign for the release of these trunk boxes of gold or rather issue a letter of authorization to somebodywho will be the foreign beneficiary to receive it on my behalf so the person can help me invest this in his country.I need you to stand as my husbands business associate,because my husbands family claims i have no child for my husband so i have no claim to this treasure.

It is my last wish to see this this trunk boxes of gold live the said bank to any where in the World. Because relatives and friends have plundered so much of my wealth based on the mere allegation that i have no child with their brother(my husband).

Please, I beg you in the name of God to help me Stand and collect the the gold from the Bank. I want a person that is God fearing that will buy the gold through the bank where the gold are deposited or assist me make the sales outside Ghana to avoid problem from my husband family

Exodus {14 VS 14} says that the lord will fight my case and I shall hold my peace.
With God all things are possible.

As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of my barrister who is ready to help us, who is in Accra as he will be the one to assist you in all the process with the bank obtaining the change of ownership document.

Yours Truly,
Mrs. Melissa Kojo

Weiner Crumbley

Ms. Kojo,

I'm terribly sorry to hear of your distress but I don't know if I can help you or not. I guess first of all, how did you come to get my email address? Have we met? Maybe we dated before? If we did I apologize for anything I might have done to you. I'm sorry but I don't recall your name.

Are you located here in Chicago?

Weiner
Melissa Kojo

Dear Weiner,

I must thank you for your swift response to my email and your sincere concerned about my predicament all the same i have to let you know that we have not met before sending you an email.

It was after frustration as a result of my illness i went into America chamber of commerce and industry to search for whom to assist me out of this problem and i promise you will not regret doing so for the sake of God..

I have face alot of depress from my husband family since i lost my dear husband but with the grace of God i was able to secure the document to the deposited gold at the bank i wrote about, please dont see this email as a way of lure you into an illegal deal or business but only to assist me being a man.

Furthermore i know you are capable of handly this issues without problem,coming back to your question where i got your email contact as i mention above that is where one can have access to information for business purpose.

it was during my search i found your email contact please for Christ sake i will want you to deal with this matter within your reach and set me out of this problem kindly indicate your readiness to help me in other for me to notify my lawyer.

Awaiting your urgent email.

Kojo. [This chick must think that Lewd and Weiner never never talk to each other...]
Weiner Crumbley

Melissa,

Very nice to hear from you again.

I went back over your first email and I see that you are in Ghana. I've never been there but it sounds like an exotic place.

I don't have any objection to helping you but I'd like to know you a little better first. Can you write and tell me a bit more about yourself, like how old you are, what kind of things you like to do in your free time, stuff like that. It would also be nice if you can send a picture so I can put a face with a name. By the way, Melissa is my favorite name for a woman.

I hope to hear back from you soon.
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

am very happy to hear from you agian thank for mail .am very young lady who will like to get a man after my late husband death he hard no child with me and i will want man who can take care of me like my husband did.but for now am looking for a GOD fearing person who can help me collect the gold deposited at the bank.and if u can do this for me i promise you will never lack in this life and can you help look for a man who can love take good care of me . dont want live in africa agian because they are wicked and very greedy.and if i collect the gold can you help me invest this in any forign country but not in africa.please i will send my you my picture for you to see.hop to hear from you

melissa .k
Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa
Saturday, 16 January 2010

hello
how are u doing?
Lewd Noogie
I'm ok. I was expecting an email from you this week but you didn't send it.
Melissa Kojo
i send am email
Lewd Noogie
I didn't receive it.
Melissa Kojo
ok
sorry
but send them
Lewd Noogie
No problem. How is everything with you?
Melissa Kojo
very thing is cool.but for now u need to call me lawer so u have a chat
Lewd Noogie
Why do I need to call your lawyer?
Melissa Kojo
to know every detials about the court
cz now i need colllect that gold from the bank cz is my life
Lewd Noogie
Send me an email with the details and include your lawyer's email address.
Do you still have my email address?
Melissa Kojo
please send it agian
Lewd Noogie
L_Noogie@xxxxxxx.com
You must not need my help very badly if you didn't even keep my email address
Melissa Kojo
ok
thank u
will be on line
Lewd Noogie
What do you mean? Will be on line when?
Melissa Kojo
plz someone hacked my id so i lost most of my contacts plz
sorry for the inconvinience
so i will send u the mail of the lawer
Lewd Noogie
Ok
I also asked you to send me a picture so I can see what you look like.
Melissa Kojo
ok
plz i will
Lewd Noogie
Ok, I have to get back to work now. I'll check for your email.
Melissa Kojo
ok
thank u for willnes to help may GOD bless
i will send all detials for
u
Lewd Noogie
Right. Talk to you later
Melissa Kojo
ok

[Melissa sends two .lnk files to Weiner. I'm not sure I want to know that badly what she looks like to try and open those...]

Weiner Crumbley

Dear Melissa,

Sorry it took me so long to get back to you.

I was happy to get your last email.but I was unable to open the picture files you sent me. I would still like to know what you look like, can you send them in .jpg format please.

To answer your question, once you get your gold I would be happpy to help you find a suitable investment if you're interested in something here in the US. Give me an idea as to the type of investment you're looking for and I'll see what I can find.

Hope to hear from you again.
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

Thank you for your kind email you will not regret helping in this matter this i can assured you the pichure i sent you i dont know why you cannot open it all the same i will try as much as possible to resend it.

However i will need your co-oparation to make this a reality by liasing with my lawyer to get this done within the shortest period of time and i know if you agree to work with him this consignment will live africa in your name and address but if only you will follow his instruction from time to time to avoid problem.

as soon as you indicate your capability to go ahead with this i will forward your details to him in other for him to commence the documentation in your name before shiping.

please am sending the pichure again.

Till i hear from you.
M.Kojo

Melissa Kojo

(to Weiner Crumbley)

January 30, 2010

sorry it took me so long to write to you i was transferred to another hospital that why....please try as mach as possible and help me and i promise you will never forget this.... am in pains now here in Ghana so please i berg in the of GOD help me. and there will be a percentage for you if you like.........i will send picture to you to....thanks for your reply GOD will bless you of what u are doing. hope you will get back to me as soon as possible

Melissa .K
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)
January 30, 2010

[Melissa sends two pictures; trust me, she's a real cutie...]

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)
January 30, 2010

[She sends another picture; my first assessment stands...]

Weiner Crumbley

Dear Melissa,

Thank you very much for the pictures, you are a very attractive woman!! We have to figure out a way to meet front-to-front someday.

You didn't say anything about being in the hospital. What's the matter, why were you in the hospital? Are you ok now?

Look, I would like to help you in any way that I can to recover your gold. Once it is in your possession, do you think you could come to Chicago for a visit? I could show you the city, introduce you to my friends and we could get to know each other better. Much better, indeed!

Tell me what I can do to help.

Potentially yours,
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa
Saturday, 30 January 2010

So what is your time over there??
Lewd Noogie
1:30am. Are you still living in the hotel?
Melissa Kojo
Yes am still in the hotel. I have deposited my cell phone to the hotel manager and promis to pay back in three days time.
Lewd Noogie
So where will you get the money to pay him? Will you just let him keep the cell phone?
Melissa Kojo
As you know I also need cell phone for communication so please if you can help me with some few amount to pay them..i promise i will pay you back after the transaction as you know now i really need an help....
Lewd Noogie
How much would you need?
Melissa Kojo
due to all my calculation spend over one week 3 days and that would be over 300
Lewd Noogie
300? 300 what?
Melissa Kojo
$300
Lewd Noogie
That's not so much.
Melissa Kojo
Ok...so when can you help me with that??
Lewd Noogie
I don't know how I would get it to you.
Melissa Kojo
Ok But do you know western union money transfer???
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, my love, I'm working in a small hotel in a very remote part of Russia. There's no Western Union here.
Melissa Kojo
Ohh so what about moneygram??
Lewd Noogie
Nyet, same thing, none here.
Melissa Kojo
Ash how can you help me??? if you can go to a near by bank and try to see ask of it because it's all over the world.
Lewd Noogie
You've never been to Russia, have you?
Melissa Kojo
No i haven't
Lewd Noogie
Figures. Usually when I send money to someone I go online and wire it to their bank account. You have a bank account, right?
Melissa Kojo
But can you send it online trough western union??
Lewd Noogie
Don't know, never tried.
Melissa Kojo
Ok..
Lewd Noogie
What's your bank account information?
Melissa Kojo
brb
am just about my information for you so please just be online. Just a few mins
Lewd Noogie
I'll be here for awhile.
Melissa Kojo
ok thanks
sorry my link went off thats why for now i will like you to send it straigh the the hotel menegers account
ok so will you like me to send it to you??
Lewd Noogie
Sure.
Melissa Kojo
Salifu Malik Jamal
Ghana commercial Bank
Account num 6251010022299...
That is the maneger account
Lewd Noogie
Why don't I send it to your account?
Melissa Kojo
I don't have bank account that's why i wontted you to send it straight to the maneger account
Lewd Noogie
What city is the bank in?
Melissa Kojo
Accra
Cuntry Ghana City, Accra
Lewd Noogie
Ok, I'll try to send it off first thing in the morning. Just $300?
Melissa Kojo
Yes i think that would be nice
Lewd Noogie
Ok
Melissa Kojo
I promis i will pass uf information to the lawyer so that he will call you in the morning...But if actualy you can tell me that time he should call you in the morning
Lewd Noogie
I'll probably get up late tomorrow so maybe around 11:00am
Melissa Kojo
Ok i will let him know that..
Lewd Noogie
Ok, I have to finish some work now. I'll talk to you later.
Melissa Kojo
Ok Then let talk later then and stay bless...Hope everything will go on fast and good for you..
Lewd Noogie
Thanks. Bye
Melissa Kojo
ok.. bye bye.. hop to hear from you tomorrow..You can send me an email after you send the money?? melissakojo56@yahoo.com
Lewd Noogie
Ok
Melissa Kojo
Thanks bye bye now..
Lewd

[Ok, I got this completely dicked up! Not paying attention to details, I sent this one from Weiner's email address ! Will they notice?]

[to Pelican Ali]

Mr. Ali,

In way of introduction, I am Lewis D. Noogie, an aquaintance of Ms. Melissa Kojo. She requested that I write to you to see if I can be of assistance in helping her recover a quantity of gold that belonged to her late father.

Please let me know how I can help her in this time of her plight.

Sincerely,
Lewis D. Noogie

Lewd Noogie

[And this one to Melissa bounces! This bait is coming apart like a cheap suit...]

Melissa,

Good news. I found the email address for your attorney that Ms. Bushburn, my admin assistant, had misplaced. I'll get a note off to him before I turn in tonight.

Lewd
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

DEAR Weiner

thanks very mach for for your willing to help me and concern for me..yes you can help me in collecting of the gold.don't worry i have all document with me. so for you will contact my lawyer so he tells you what you will do....as you said in your mail yes we need to see and no each other better i think that a good ideal and i will like to come to Chicago for a visit BUT HOW ?yes i said am in a hospital some few days now just some malaria attack.and no now we need to do something fast because my late husband family are working hard to get it but they cant as i said i have all document so far they have collected his house from me and am now in a hotel now..but will you help for investment of my gold? after i don't want to be in Africa after getting it..they are all greedy. ...but for now i don't know you better so i will need this information from you.

scan your passport for me...and your full name....address

hope to hear from you soon

Melissa .K
Weiner Crumbley

Hello Melissa,

I'm very glad to hear you're feeling better. Having malaria must be a real pain i the tuchus; I hope it's not contagious.

I'm also glad to hear that you would like to come to Chicago to visit. Why don't you sell some of your gold, buy a plane ticket, and come on over. Just let me know what your flight schedule is and I'll meet you at the airport.

I don't understand how I can help your lawyer. I don't know anything about the law in THIS country, let alone your country. Have him contact me and I'll see what I can do.

Looking forward to seeing you.
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

Thank you very much weiner what you must understand is that i dont have direct access to the said gold because it was deposited by my late husband which i have explained to you in my first email.

in this case i want you to help me stand as a family friend there in america to work things out with the lawyer as the beneficiary to the gold,however i have asked the lawyer to email you today on the details letting you know how to finish this transaction with you.

please as soon as you hear from him let me know in other to give you guard from time to time.
Thank you and remain bless.

Melissa.
Barrister Percy Williams

Attn: MR Weiner
Inheritance claim

First and formost i must sincerely apologize for the late response it was due to some fact circumstancis beyound my control over the sympathentic case of Melissa Kojo I'am please to inform you that base on your aggrement with Melissa Kojo i swing into actions since three days ago.

I did all legal findings to get the acurate solution and the best possible way to get this whole matter resolve without problem,my friend i will start by letting you know that transaction of this nature do not need to handle with levity otherwise we are going to lose the rase.am very sure you are awear of the battle between Melissa Kojo and her husband family over this deposited Gold??. However i have file formal application to the high court of justic accra ghana waiting to hear from them within three working days which will elaps tomorrow,they shall tell us all that is needed to perfect this claims after they verify the Gold actually exist as claim on the application,in between time i will not fail to update you when i get every details on the way forward.

while we patiently wait to hear from the probate office i want to bring to your notice that my processing fees is very important you should be aware that it is a normal practice for lawyers to be paid their legal fees before the completion of their services,in consideration of this i urge you to willingly indicate your capability and willingness to pay my legal fees and take this transaction to it logical end without relenting,as a well know lawyer i will do my possible best to make sure this consignment is approve in your legal name as provided within the shortest possible time.

once again i want you to indicate your readiness as i said above because this is going to involve alot of people at the high places to make sure we do not pass through back door meaning we must make sure every process is legel to avoid any eyebrow or problem.

Thank you and God bless.
I wait to hear from you asap
Bar.Percy Williams

Pelican Ali

Dear. Lewis D. Noogie

I have long forwarded your email to my chief attorney to this honorable chambers who promised to deal with your request ASAP till today i have to remind him and he promised to get back to you today to intimate you how far he has gone.

However i'm his personal secretary and my chief attorney Full Name is Bar.Percy Williams please follow his instructions for better conclusion.

Thank you and we promised you a better legal service as we move on.

Sincerely Ali........
Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

Melissa told me a little about some of the problems she's having with her family over this gold deposit. I'm just trying to help her get what she deserves. I suppose she will settle the issue of your processing fees with you.

I think her idea is that she wants to send the gold here to Chicago and have me receive and hold it for her. I think I'm supposed to inform you that I will be the receiver. I guess that the only thing I'll need from you is some kind of schedule as to when I should expect it to arrive.

I look forward to hearing from you again.
Weiner Crumbley

Barrister Percy Williams

Attn weine

I must thank you for your swift response to my email of today however i want you to know very well that Melissa i know has a serious problem with her late husband family who is left with the deposited gold here in Ghana, and i have to state it clearly that she need someone who will help her see this gold live the bank through the help of a good lawyer like me and your position should be helping her to pay for the money needed to secure the documentations to make sure the gold live the bank to you in Chicago my area is to make sure all the legal documents are available to the bank for approval if you distance your self from securing the document i think is still the same problem here.

And again Melissa is doing this alone things all lone except me and you who know about this because if the husband family come to know about this they will stop her and take over the whole process so i will really asked for your help to assist her get this document and receive the gold for whatever purpose you both agreed upon.

Thank you.
Awaiting your email.
Bar.Williams

Lewd Noogie
Mr. Ali,

I have been out of town all week and I have heard from neither Ms. Kojo or your Chief Attorney Williams. If you are in touch with Ms. Kojo could you please ask her to contact me at L_Noogie@xxxxx.

Thank you,
Lewis B. Noogie
Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Saturday, 06 February 2010

hello
Lewd Noogie
hello
Melissa Kojo
how are u doing. my lawyer siad he called but u did not talk.and the hotel maneger said he waited but nothing came
Lewd Noogie
I asked my admin assistant to send $300 to the account number you gave me. I'm sure she would have said something if she didn't send it.
Melissa Kojo
ok biy u dont know western unoin money transfer since that time i have been trying to get u but did not i men trying to see you online that week
Lewd Noogie
I haven't been on my computer all week. I was on a a business trip to Magnitogorsk.
Melissa Kojo
oooh okk....how ur bussines trip?? did the lawyer call u
Lewd Noogie
I didn't receive any phone calls while I was gone, at least none that I know of.
Melissa Kojo
ooh he siad he called and some pik but did not talk.
Lewd Noogie
Not me. It must have been whoever was working the reception desk. Did he speak Russian?
Melissa Kojo
I dont know for that
Lewd Noogie
When I see my admin assistant Ms. Bushburn I'll make sure she sent the $300.
Melissa Kojo
ok when please so i tell the maneger
Lewd Noogie
ok
Melissa Kojo
but when can the lawyer call that he get you so i tell hhim.
Lewd Noogie
I've already started corresponding with your lawyer by email.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok since when
Lewd Noogie
I don't remember what day, I think last week.
Melissa Kojo
ok...thanks very much...ok any time u give him a mail then forward to me too ok
Lewd Noogie
ok, I'll try to remember. Don't you talk with your lawyer?
Melissa Kojo
yes i doo thanks...but when i get the money or day so can ur assistance send it today
Lewd Noogie
I'm sure she sent it early in the week, like Monday or Tuesday.
Melissa Kojo
ok...after sending she can call the maneger....0546698647 that is his number ok
Lewd Noogie
I mean she already sent it last week after I talked with you.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok let me ask the maneger cz he told me nothing about that but when i talk to my lawyer he did say anything about u emailing him
Lewd Noogie
He even responded to me.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok but he siad nothing like that to me...to which email
can u remember the email address
Lewd Noogie

[Lewd invents a rival scammer.]

Yes. It was iamindada@yahoo.com. He just said he had a client that wanted to move funds to my account and for me to send him my details.
I asked Ms. Bushburn to work with him while I was gone.
Melissa Kojo
Huh...that wasn't the lawyer address...i think it was a mistake...
But be very careful and never send your account information to any body..Don't even try that...
I dont want you to get yourself involve to anything that wont make you happy
Lewd Noogie
Not to worry, the only lawyer I was expecting to hear from was your lawyer.
Melissa Kojo
Ok but be very careful please..
I think i have to give you the correct email adddress of the lawyer
Lewd Noogie
I have work to do at the reception desk. I'll talk to Ms. Bushburn this afternoon and let you know.
Melissa Kojo

IM Left For Lewd
Sunday, February 7

good day mt brother....how was work? i did tell my lawyer he siad that he will give you a call or an email and tld me many thing you need to do but he explain all in his mail for you...but the hotel maneger siad the was not sent to him so i should tell you that you should give him the information of money so that one you can send it to me in my mail...please my dear brother help me so i get my gold and help pay my bills...i will be waiting for mail....
Pelican Ali
(to Lewd Noogie)

Thank you i have forwarded your email to my Chief Attorney Williams.he will get back to you as soon as possible.

Thank you.
Ali
Barrister Percy Williams
Attn Lewis.

Am very surprised receiving your email from my secretary (Ali)that you did not hear from me neither Melissa kojo you have stated in your last mail to me that you are not going to be responsible with any expensis incure as a result of this transaction but i responded immediatly since then you did not get back to me on the way forward.

Please let me know your stand.

Thank you.
Bar.Percy Williams
Melissa Kojo

Dear Weiner,

I hope you are very fine over there this morning Bar Ali forwarded your email to me asking me to contact you on one email i made him to understand that i talk to you yesterday here please try and help me out of this pending problem.

The lawyer are not happy with me because i did not tell them how the charges are going to be taking care of till this end time,you will not regrect helping me in this transaction all is set as far the lawyer are ready to work with us and get this deposited gold out of the bank i think we should not let this charges be a stumbly block i really beg of you to assist me.

God will bless you as you do this for me.
Thank you.
Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dear Melissa,

So good to hear from you again. Have you given any more thought to coming to Chicago to visit me?

I'm not sure I understand what you meant when you said you talked to me yesterday. Maybe you are confusing me with a different boyfriend? I hope not!

I've been in correspondence with your lawyer but he hasn't been very helpful. I still have no idea what he wants me to do. If you talk to him in the near future, tell him he needs to get a plan together and let me know what I should do.

I look at your pictures and I think about you a lot. I can't wait to finally meet you in person.

Weiner
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

Sorry i said so to make him feel am in full communication with you,dear you should know how lawyers think....what he is asking for is charges to commence full action on this project please you can negotiate with him he may understand.

He know my condition if you can talk to him he will work with you, dear do this for me God will bless you.i will come to Chicago when all is set i mean when the gold finally get to Chicago.

Till i hear from you.
Melissa..

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

The lawyer is asking for charges to get started? Do you know how much these charges are? Somehow I just knew that things would get difficult with a lawyer involved. The last time I used a lawyer was to help me fight a speeding ticket, and I was only going 5 mph over the speed limit. The lawyer was so inept I ended up doing 6 years in state prison for it. I hope we don't have another one of those.

Find out how much he's gonna charge and see if we can pay him after we get the gold. You're a beautiful woman, use some of those feminine wiles on him. I'm sure he'll come around.

Write soon.
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

My Dear Weiner this lawyer is a well know lawyer here in Ghana with is credibility he will not dent his long build image and Good name. so feel free and deal with him.

As per the charges i will want you to rob mind with him and i will also try to take the pic as you said,contact him to tell you the cost of the charges then i can come in from there please.
Just do this for me and God will bless you.

Thank you.
Melissa.

Weiner Crumbley
Mr. Williams,

I have been waiting to hear from you to tell me what I have to do to settle the issue of Melissa's inheritance. Please let me know as oosn as possible what my responsibilities are.

Thank you,
W. Crumbley
Barrister Percy Williams

Attn Mr.Weiner

Thank you for your email,and i must sincerely commend your effort to assist Melissa out of this present situation she found herself today as a result of her late husband,you did not need much to do here because i have file an application in your names to the high court and am expected to come over and clear my normal affidavit charges at the probate office with the sum of $1,350USD (One Thousand Three Hundred And Fifty Dollars) here in Accra,as soon as i paid this said charges i will obtain a clearance receipt from the same office and put in another application to the bank where the gold are deposited.

With my legal connections i can bit my chest that within five working days an approval latter will be issue in your name to release the said gold and as soon as is release i will work with the bank to make sure they use their bank courier to shipped the gold to you if on the ground that you don't want it that way you can come over to Ghana i will lead you to the bank and assist you in the area you want me to assist there at the bank.

Most importantly we have to get the clearance receipt from probate office declaring you as the legal beneficiary when this is done the bank side will not be a problem.please kindly direct the payment to my secretary Pelican Ali for immediate action and i promised to discharge my legal duty effectively for a better completion for this assignment.

Please respond bank as soon as possible.

Sincerely Bar. Percy Williams
Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

I have to say that $1,350 sounds like a lot of money for this. Please explain in detail exactly what you have to do. I mean, for the very small amount of time that you will devote to this, your price seems exorbitant.

While I trust Ms. Kojo completely, it occurs to me that I have seen no evidence that this gold actually is in her name. Is this something that you can provide.

W. Crumbley
Barrister Percy Williams

Attn:MR Weiner

You are very right for saying this amount is on the high side i want you to understand the fact that a lot need to be done in respect to this pending matter firstly i have to put an application in your name to the probate office which i have officially done on your behalf hence Melissa said i should go ahead,standing as the first case in this matter if we must make a head way....secondly when we received the clearance certificate from the said office i will proceed to high court and swear affidavit stating that you are the beneficiary to the deposited gold at the bank here in Ghana and the said affidavit must be sign my the commissioner for oath.

This will enable me to take the documents along with the certificate of deposit bearing Melissa late husband name which shall be change to your name to the bank and pursue your claims,however i will not fail to send you the whole documents as soon as they are ready.the good thing about this business is that certificate of deposit is in our hand which is the only document needed for this procedure.

Consequently this gold was deposited in Melissa late husband name this is the reason all this documents are needed in other to back up your claims i can assured you and Melissa that with my legal influence am not going to take this matter through any back door for a better completion my result must be as i promised.

I don't want to demand from you what will stop Melissa achieving this her only source of hope since her husband died what i demanded for is going to be used for charges at the probate office and high court considering the work and sacrifice here i think am very considerate?? i never ask for 10% legal fees as normal thing every lawyer will demand for in a case like this.

We are both doing this innocent woman a favour and God will pay us back this is the reason i do not want to take it as every other business is very crucial to me,more over she is a widow so please dont wast time as time is of essence to this matter.

Thank you.
I remain yours sincerely.
Bar.Pery Williams.

Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Sunday, 14 February 2010

hello
Lewd Noogie
Hello back.
Melissa Kojo
ok it along time...how was work
Lewd Noogie
It's been very busy here at the hotel. How are you doing?
Melissa Kojo
am fine and?
Lewd Noogie
And what?
Melissa Kojo
and u...how are u doing
Lewd Noogie
Tired but everything is good.
Melissa Kojo
ok...i keep praying for u
Lewd Noogie
Thank you.
Melissa Kojo
cz u have been so good to me...but last time i did not get the money u sent.
Lewd Noogie
I'm still trying to find out if Ms. Bushburn, my admin assistant, sent it or not.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok...but cant u send it through western union money transfer
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, dear, I already explained that to you. There's no Western Union of Moneygram here in Gadyukina.
Melissa Kojo
ook ok sorry
Lewd Noogie
By the way, I thought you said your lawyer was going to contact me about helping to get your gold.
Melissa Kojo
yes he said he sent u a mail but no reply yet from u
Lewd Noogie
I don't remember getting anything from him
Melissa Kojo
but did you send him a mail??
Lewd Noogie
I don't know. There's been so much going on here I don't remember.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok...them let me give his email then...pelican.ali@yahoo.com
Lewd Noogie
Oh yeah, Pelican. I think I did send him something but never heard back. Something occurred to to me and it might be important - what was your husband's first name?
Melissa Kojo
harry kojo
Lewd Noogie
Harry, right. I was afraid of that.
Melissa Kojo
WHY?
Lewd Noogie
Actually, I did talk with Ms. Bushburn about whether or not she sent the money to you. She said she didn't and she wouldn't. When I asked her why she told me to google 'Melissa Kojo'. I did and your name popped up, you and Harry. You're all over the internet as a scammer. 419, I believe it's called.
Melissa Kojo
OOH WHY...DO U THINK I CAN DO THAT TO U...I PROMISE TO THE GOD I WORSHIP I CAN NOT DO THAT
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, don't worry, it's cool. Actually it's kind of cool talking to a scammer.
Melissa Kojo
OOH WHY CAN I DO THAT TO
Lewd Noogie
Nice try, though.
Melissa Kojo
u have made me feel very bad...i belive alot...i believe u alot...ooh what have i done wrong plz tell me
Lewd Noogie
Well, for one thing, you lied to me about having all this gold. And then you wanted me to send you money. And according to Ms. Bushburn, pretty soon your 'lawyer' would have started asking me for money. But there's no gold, right?
Hey, we can still be friends.
Melissa Kojo
i told my problem with late husband family
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, you did. All lies, I'm afraid.
Melissa Kojo
i promise i can not lie to
Lewd Noogie
Just tell me this much - are you a guy?
Melissa Kojo
What saying
Lewd Noogie
I suspect you're a guy and you spend all day (or night) sitting in some internet cafe trying to scam people by email or IM.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok is that what u think
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Maya spent a whole day teaching me about 419 scams.
Pretty interesting stuff.
Melissa Kojo
i promise am noot one
Lewd Noogie
Like I said, don't worry about it. So how did you get into scamming?
Melissa Kojo
but it ok if u dont believe me
Lewd Noogie
Good. So now we're being honest with each other. A good start.
Melissa Kojo
so u dont believ me...it ok i know my GOD will help me find some one
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, my love, it's NOT IMPORTANT that I don't believe you. You're the first scammer I've ever corresponded with; you have my heart (Jeez, I HOPE you're not a guy).
Melissa Kojo
i siad am not...what do u want me to do to prove to...i think some one is decieving u that am a scammer
oooh dont worry if u like dont help my GOD is there for me
Lewd Noogie
I don't think so. Maya showed me the number of google hits for Melissa and Harry Kojo. It's you alright.
Melissa, God doesn't like thieves.
Melissa Kojo
am not ok...plz dont insult me that am a thieve ok...is ok thx for friend ship...at the end this is what you think about me
Lewd Noogie
Nice try, Melissa. Look, this could be an opportunity for both of us. This whole 419 thing is really cool! You could teach me about it. I'm a reasonably intelligent mugu, I could learn it.
Melissa Kojo
it ok...off now...byeee
Lewd Noogie
Hey, don't go! Whatsa matter, ain't we pals no more?
Don't gooooooo!
Melissa Kojo
no u dont believe so i have nothing to say to
Lewd Noogie
Jeez, woman, have you got rocks in your ears? I said it doesn't matter if you're a scammer. I still want to be friends!
Melissa Kojo
why u call me scammer and u want to be my friend
why do u want to be my friend tell me
Lewd Noogie
Look, it's a great cultural opportunity for both of us. I'm here in Russia and you're there in Asia or Antarctica or wherever you are. We can learn things from each other.
Melissa Kojo
ooh that good but no trust
Lewd Noogie
You're WRONG! Now that everything is out in the open, there's nothing BUT trust!!
C'mon, it'll be good for both of us!
Melissa Kojo
why?
Lewd Noogie
Why?? I just explained that to you.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok
Lewd Noogie
Yay!! So we're pals again?
Melissa Kojo
i know there is some decieving u there
Lewd Noogie
What do you mean?
Melissa Kojo
yes that am scammer u know
Lewd Noogie
Doesn't matter, I still like you. As a matter of fact, I like you even MORE now.
Melissa Kojo
why/ do you like me
Lewd Noogie
Because even after I told you I was on to you, you still kept trying to convince me otherwise. I like a strong woman like that (please, please be a woman. I don't want to think I'm talking like this to a guy)
By the way, you never sent me a picture. I wanna see what you look like.
Melissa Kojo
i have i can let you see me on cam for trust if u want to
Lewd Noogie
Just send me a picture of yourself.
Melissa Kojo
know want u see me on cam so believe ok
Lewd Noogie
Ok, how do we do it?
Melissa Kojo
what are u using to browse
a computer or phone
Lewd Noogie
I use IE to browse, on my computer
Melissa Kojo
ok do u have msn?
Lewd Noogie
I'll tell you what - Ms. Bushburn is my computer expert. I'll see if she can set me up to view you on webcam. Will you come back next week?
Melissa Kojo
ooh yes...u can call me to come online on my phone
Lewd Noogie
It's very difficult for me to call out of here, the phone system is terrible. Just look for me to come online next weekend.
Listen, it's been a long day and we've made real progress here but I have to get some sleep. Look for me next weekend.
Melissa Kojo
thx for chat
Lewd Noogie
No, thank YOU!
Melissa Kojo
bad chat
Lewd Noogie
Good chat!
Melissa Kojo
hahahahah so who is winnie? to u
Lewd Noogie
Winnie? Do you mean Maya? Maya Bushburn, she's my admin assistant.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok...so u would not send thhe money again to me.
Lewd Noogie
Certainly not because you say you have gold. We can talk more about the money later.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok so u will not help me as a good friend??? ok let me get ur personal phone number
Lewd Noogie
The number here at the hotel is 7.495.964.xxxx. This is the number for the front desk here at the hotel. Just ask for Lewd and they'll find me. Don't call tonight cause I gotta get some sleep ok call u tommorow...sound sleep
Lewd Noogie
Good night, mi vida.

[This is great!! Melissa and I are, like,............dating! But will she stand me up next week?]

Weiner Crumbley

Meanwhile...

Mr. Williams.

I am ready to do whatever it takes to help Melissa in her time of need but I would very much like to see the deposit slip for the gold. If you would, please scan and send it to me.

Thanks.
W. Crumbley

Barrister Percy Williams

Attn:weiner

Attached is the certificate of deposit.

Please kindly study and get back to me as soon as possible.this documents are for you alone dont give out to third party is very confidential.

Sincerely.

Bar.Percy Williams
Melissa Kojo

IM Left For Lewd
Monday, February 15

hello u realy spolt my day yesterday dont worry some is decieving u to lose one the great thing in ur life...plz think about that ok...dont let ur asistace deccieved u...u are not on the right truck ok...
Weiner Crumbley

Dear Melissa,

How have you been? I hope this email finds you well and happy. Have you thought any more about coming to visit me here in Chicago? I'm not going to stop asking until you say yes.

Melissa, I no longer have the first email you sent me but didn't you say your husband's first name was something like Herman or Horace or something like that? The reason I ask is because Mr. Williams sent me a copy of the deposit certificate for your husband's gold and the name on it is Joseph Kojo. I'm pretty sure the name you gave me before wasn't Joseph. Can you check this with Mr. Williams and let me know if this is a problem.

It's very cold here in Chicago now, lots of snow over the weekend. I don't know if you get snow where you are but if you don't I think you'll really enjoy the winters here. Chicago is really a nice city after a snowfall.

Write back soon.
Weiner

Melissa Kojo

My dear Weiner,

I must sincerely thank you for your email and effort which you are making to see that i did not lose this my last hope in Ghana however my Husband really name is Joseph Kojo and that is the name he used to deposit the said Gold.

In the area of my coming to Chicago is not negotiable i must come there to join you the only thing holding me back here is this gold because as soon as this gold is out of Africa the next line of action is to join you up and i cannot wait to be with you.

My only fear is that you should not abandon me after this gold get to you in America moreover no one can touch this consignment except you as far you are now the beneficiary to the deposited gold.

In west Africa where i hail from nothing like snow is either raining season or dry season,now we are in dry season from April we should start experiencing full raining season.

Honey i put all my trust in you don't live me out of this mess i found myself life has taking me where i did not belong please do your best and God will surely reward you in all your endeavor Amen.

The lawyer has really set to help us and take this gold to you as soon as possible.

Please honey always update me with the next line of actions from the lawyer for further advice.

God Bless you.

Melissa..
Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

I thank you for the deposit certificate and I'm now convinced that the gold is there. Please instruct me on what we should do next.

Sincerely,
s W. Crumbley

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

My Dear Weiner,

How are you today i hope all is well with you over there since your last email to me i did not hear from you again please you know life has placed me where i did not belong and since i ment you i have this hope of delivered from every agony i have been passing throuhg please work with the lawyer to make this a thing of the past.

The lawyer said he did not hear from you neither me please i beg you in the name of God help me and you will not regrect doing so in your life.

Thank you and God bless you.

Till i hear from you......i love you. Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

So good to hear from you, it always makes my day. I had just sent an email to Mr. Williams when I saw your email. I'll let you know when I hear back from him.

I have to open the bar by myself this morning so I have to keep this short. Write to me again soon.

Your Weiner
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley) Thank you weiner for your email i will wait to hear from you as soon as you hear from Mr.Williams. May God be with you in all your endeavour Amen. Melissa
Barrister Percy Williams

Attn:Weiner

I long expected your response to my last email but proved abortive i hope you are Ok?actually we dont need to wast time as far i have file a formal application to the probate office, in this case i expected you to make the payment i requested from you in other to expandate action on your behalf as i have expalin in my provious email to you.

Please let me know when you are ready to send the money.

Thank you.
Bar.Williams.

Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

As money is somewhat tight these days, Melissa and I would like to delay payment until such time as her gold has been transferred. I know that you care about her well-being and I'm confident that this will be acceptable to you.

We hope that this solution meets with your approval.

Thank you,
W. Crumbley

Barrister Percy Williams

Attn:weiner

Thank you for your swift response to my email please you should understand that Melissa has told me she don't have enough money that is why she is hoping on you in this matter please tell me how you can share the money with her so that i can proceed the documentation in your name as soon as possible to avoid delay.

Thank you.
Bar.Williams

Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Saturday Morning, 20 February

hello
Lewd Noogie
Hello there
Melissa Kojo
how are you doing
Lewd Noogie
Doing ok. You?
Melissa Kojo
am fine how is work??
and ur asistace
Lewd Noogie
Busy as always here at the hotel and my assistant is out of town at the moment.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok i hand wanted u to see me on cam...u siad this week
Lewd Noogie
I know but Maya hasn't been around to set it up for me.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok
so u stil dont believe rite
Lewd Noogie
Believe what?
Melissa Kojo
me u siad am scammer
Lewd Noogie
Yeah i still think you're a scammer but like I said it doesn't matter to me.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok
is very difficult to trust all people all time but u must trust some one at some time ok
am just a poor woman soliciting ur help
u have ben so good to me and never did i have any bad intention of doing that to u ok
trust me
what prove do u need to believe in me??
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, my love, just go to google and put in Melissa and Harry Kojo - see what you get.
Melissa Kojo
yes i saw what u mean
u see in Ghana people normally bears almost same name
melissa kojo is my name and i will not change it because somebody who is a scammer is bearing the same name ok
is just left for me to prove my self innocent with any body am dealing with
Lewd Noogie
So how would you prove your innocence?
Melissa Kojo
i just want to show u my webcam and every document about my self so in the case of any illegal dealing u can trace me out
or any identity u want me to show just to prove my innocent dear
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, silly girl, if I let you scam me there's no way I could find you. What am I gonna do - send the CIA to raid your internet cafe?
Melissa Kojo
ohhhhh ok but now i need ur trust
so now what do u neeed to trust me???
or prove to u that am not a scammer as u presume
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, there is no way you can prove that you're not a scammer because I know you are. If we're gonna make anything out of this relationship you have to start telling the truth.
What happens if we get married someday - do you want to start out our marriage with a lie? It would never work out.
Melissa Kojo
awwwww u make me feel very bad
cos ihave never lied to any one left alone somebody i call my husband or would be husband
what do u i need to show now to clean my self from this mess
what i need now is ur trust ok
if i get that without u helping me am ok
i will send u my pictures and scan my passport for u anmd send to u
and showing my self on webcam too ok
Lewd Noogie
By all means send a picture so I can see what you look like.
Melissa Kojo
ok i will and what do need to agian to believe me
Lewd Noogie
You are much more attractive to me as a scammer than you are as a wealthy woman. This scammer stuff is very sexy. At this moment you're the sexiest woman I know.
Melissa Kojo
no i dont believe...ok am not and will not be a scammer God forbid i can never be that is not part of me
am very sexy uas u say but not on the basis of scammering
why should i scam my own people...my dad is a white man i just happen to live in ghana cos my mum is frome hear
but lost my dad several years ago very young
the Kojo is my late husbandss name and it is a name given to any body born on monday...just it happen to be my late husbands last name
my dads name is WOODMAN
Lewd
Sorry to hear about your dad but that has nothing to do with it. When you said you had all this gold I was only mildly interested. But when I found out that you were trying to scam me, the lights came on in the house of love!
I really want to see your picture. If you're hot AND a scammer, I'M HOOKED!!
Melissa Kojo
i don't know if am attractive or not but i will send u...cos beauty lies in the eye of beholder
will be online in next 1 hour? just want to buy some food outside and get back to u
Lewd Noogie
Send me a picture. It's pretty late here and I've still got work to finish but I can check back in an hour or so.
Melissa Kojo
please check back for me ok...i will be back later
Lewd Noogie
Ok, later...

[This just gets better!! Melissa and I are, like,............engaged!!]

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I tried to convince Mr. Williams to let us pay him after we move your gold but I don't think he's going to let us. He wants almost $1,400 dollars to take care of this for us. How much money do you have saved? Do you have enough to pay this?

Weiner
Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Saturday Evening, 20 February

hello
Lewd Noogie
how are you?
Melissa Kojo
i sent my pic to ur box
Lewd Noogie
Hang on a minute, let me check.
THAT'S YOU?? WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO ON THE HONEYMOON?? ANYPLACE YOU WANT!!
Melissa Kojo
yes is me
i will like too ur pic too
Lewd Noogie
I think I've got one on my other computer. I'll try to send it to you tomorrow.
Melissa Kojo
ok am wiating to see u but i dont mach about u
Lewd Noogie
What do you mean? u never told me about ur self so i dont know mach about u.
Lewd Noogie
I told you about me - I'm an international hotel consultant and I'm working at a hotel here in Gadyukina, Russia
Melissa Kojo
are u from russia or just workking there
Lewd Noogie
I'm just working here, I'm originally from Georgia.
But never mind me, you're the interesting one here. Do you speak any languages besides English?
Melissa Kojo
french
Lewd Noogie
French?? French?? I LOVE it when a woman speaks French, it drives me up the wall! Write something in French!
Melissa Kojo
Mon nom est Melissa et vous
u there??
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I'm here, just breathless! I was too excited to write there for a minute! You're the perfect woman!
Melissa Kojo
really...u siad am a scammer
Lewd Noogie
Yes, but that's part of what makes you perfect.
Melissa Kojo
what part
Lewd Noogie
I mean, you're definitely beautiful, you speak French, and the scamming part is very sexy.
Melissa Kojo
what...i siad i dont scam why dont u believe me...i cannot lie to u ok am a honest person
Lewd Noogie
And you've got all this gold that you want to send me, someone who was a total stranger. Yeah, right.
C'mon Melissa, I thought we were past all of this.
Melissa Kojo
yesh is the plans am paasing through that i promise i have gold i took picture of that with the lawyer...if u want i can send that for seethat type of gold i have
Lewd Noogie
Are you in the picture?
Melissa Kojo
yes i am
Lewd Noogie
Ok, send the picture. I'd like to see it.
Melissa Kojo
ok i will send them to ur box...some just trying to destroy our friendship and bussines
Lewd Noogie
Don't worry about that, won't happen.
Melissa Kojo
ok is that i need the rust back thats why
Lewd Noogie
Listen, I have to get back to the reception desk. Send the picture and if you're still online we can talk some more.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok i will be online ok. byee

[I would mention that the pictures Melissa sent were pretty spectacular! This chick is a knockout! Unfortunately, they're not quite the same as the ones she sent Weiner; different woman, different race, different everything. Maybe this can be chalked up to different lighting conditions when the pictures were taken??]

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

Sweetheart,

I must thank you for your email and effort in this matter sincerely speaking i dont have money with me but i can only manage to sell my gold necklace and ring but i dont know how much i can raise from this sales and if i have to do this please honey tell me how much you can assist me with before i can go ahead and sell it tomorrow i know as soon as this gold is release in your names i can get my sold items back please honey am begging you in the name of God help me i will be with you when this is over i cannot live here if i dont lay claims to this gold.

You are my last resort please help me i'm here on my kneel begging you to do this for me we are going to spent the rest of our life together this is my promised to you and i know you are not going to let me down with our formal arrangement.

please honey get back in other for me to know what to do.

I love you honey God will bless you.

YOUR lovely baby Melissa...
Weiner Crumbley

[Ok, let's see if Melissa has any kind of a conscience...]

Dearest Melissa,

I had an idea how I might be able to raise the money for the lawyer. I have to take medication for a heart condition and the medication is very expensive, over $2,000 a month. I was thinking if I cut the dosage back to 50% I could send the other half of the money to your lawyer. I spoke with my doctor about this and he told me it's very dangerous, that the dosage is very carefully calculated, and by not taking the full amount I would be running the risk of a massive heart attack at any time.

Maybe the doctor is just being overly cautious, because I feel pretty good most of the time. I'm willing to try going on half dosage if you want me to. How long do you think it will take to get the gold sent here once I pay the lawyer?

Tell me what you want me to do. Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Sunday, 21 February

hello dear how are u doing??
Lewd Noogie
Hey there.
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok what ud doing now
Lewd Noogie
Finishing up some work before going to bed. Hey, you were going to send me another picture, right?
Melissa Kojo
ooh ok what type of picture do u want
Lewd Noogie
You said you had a picture of you and your gold.
Melissa Kojo
yes
Lewd Noogie
So send it.
Melissa Kojo
am trying to scan it now and send it to
Lewd Noogie
They have scanners in the internet cafe?
Melissa Kojo
no in the hotel
Lewd Noogie
I see. That's very convenient.
Melissa Kojo
ok am trying to send it
Lewd Noogie
Where'd you go?
Melissa Kojo
the connection went off
Lewd Noogie
I see. You gonna send the picture?
Melissa Kojo
yes i will ok...just wiat tryingto scan it now
Lewd Noogie
Ok, take your time. [Half an hour later...]
Lewd Noogie
What's taking so long?
Melissa Kojo
the scanner is very bad...plz wiat ok...am trying it...it will work
Lewd Noogie
Melissa, dear, I have to go to bed now. Send the picture when you get it scanned and I'll look to see if you're online in the morning.
Melissa Kojo
ok i will this night...take care.

[The picture never arrives...]

Melissa Kojo

(to Weiner Crumbley)

Thank you My sweetheart and very sorry for your heart condition i will not want to push you to do what can cause your life because life is more precious than gold and diamond,immediately i received your email i contacted the lawyer and asked him what are the time stipulated for this whole process who said if we can pay the money tomorrow Monday he will get the documents from the probate office and proceed to the bank and seek for the release of the gold on your behalf.

Furthermore is going to take a day to secure the documents from the probate office while the bank process will take him 5 working days after there he is expected to ship the gold to your nominated address and if the gold live Ghana after the 5 working days it means is going to take almost 10 days to be delivered.

In this case i will really advice, if you know your health will not disturb you within this time please kindly send the money to him but if you know you cannot please i will sincerely advice you to go and treat yourself and send the money at your convenient time to him.the deposited gold has been there all these years nothing happen life can be lost if care is not taken i love you so much that i will not want anything to happen to you.

Honey let me know if is convenient for you to send him the money so i can let him know about the payment.

I love you Honey May God bless you in all your endeavor.
Melissa

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

Sweetheart,since my last email i did not hear from you i hope all is OK?please email me even of the negative ,the lawyer is really putting pressure on me please can you tell him when you are willing to send him the money because he call me this morning.

Thank you till i hear from you.
Melissa your love.

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I've been struggling with myself these past couple of days over what to do. If this was all happening 2 months from now there would be no problem because I have a large income tax refund coming. I guess I'd be willing to go without my heart medication for a month but I need your encouragement. I wish you were here, it would make the decision so much easier. Should I try to get by without the medication for a month or should we wait? Help me decide.

Your Weiner
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

My Love you have spoken well but what i want us to do is to beg the lawyer to take half of the money then we will pay the balance when the gold is release you can make the half payment to him.i said this in other for the documents to be secured otherwise we cannot do anything with the bank on the release.

love I'm really sorry for your health don't worry God will see you through.

Till i hear from you.

your Baby love.

Melissa
Melissa Kojo

IM Left For Lewd
Friday, 25 February

hello dear i have been trying to get the pics for u but the scanner is very bad so dont worry am still trying ok
any is done i will send it to u ok
hope to chat with u on week end...stay blessed
Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

Ms. Kojo and I would like to ask again if we might be allowed to pay for your services either after her gold is delivered here to Chicago or around the 1st of May, whichever comes first. You see, cash flow at the moment has been a bit tenuous for both Ms. Kojo and myself. However, I am expecting a large income tax refund early in May and will have no problem paying you at that time.

If this is acceptable to you, go ahead and begin the process to have the gold moved.

W. Crumbley
Barrister Percy Williams

Thank you Weiner,

I will wait pending when you are ready to secure the full documents what i will advice you to do is to send 200us Dollars to clear the letter of administration from probate office when we can secure this letter of administration heading for high court when you are ready will not be a problem.

Please respond quickly
Barr Williams

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

Dearest Winner

how are you doing? hope everything it OK. any time i dont hear from you i dont feel ok sweetheart you should i always want hear from CZ i having thinking all day in my life. but don't worry GOD is in control there is nothing the devil can do to you i alway pray for everyday you should also keep praying for self too CZ i believe there will no any operation for all will be well with you and i know i will come and meet healthy in chicago after collecting my gold OK dear my GOD don't fail me and i know he will not too so sweetheart don't think OK you are fine that what i believe ok...can you send me some picture too.....i wanted as try as mach as possible to get the gold before may be third week of next month and we are through with everything thing so i can there meet you sweetheart.

take care of self for me EVERYTHING IS WELL OK....

Melissa
Weiner Crumbley

My dearest Melissa,

I have decided to sell my car to get enough money to pay off Mr. Williams. I don't want to wait two months to get you here. I've never felt like this about anyone and I can't believe I can feel this way obout someone that I haven't even met. I guess it's a combination of your beautiful pictures and your impeccible writing that won me over. Lets get this done so we can be together.

I don't know how long it will take me to sell it; tell your lawyer that I'm working as fast as I can to get his money for him.

Please write soon.
Your Weiner

At this point Melissa starts avoiding me on IM; I come on, she goes off. I'm guessing she figures she's ready to reel Weiner in and the chances of getting anything out of Lewd don't look too good. Maybe it's time for Lewd and Weiner to put their pointy heads together...

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)
sweetheart Weinner how are you doing hope you are doing good. have never meet some like this in my life like you. that why i pray for good things to come on way i dont even know how to express my love and care to till we meet for you to see real soul mate but it dont matter how far you are for now CZ i know we are going to meet within some few month. I am thinking of you, In my sleepless solitude tonight. If it's wrong to love you, then my heart just won't let me be right. 'Cause I'm drowned in you my love.. every thing will be will in the name of GOD..I WILL NEVER STOP PRAYING FOR MY LOVE what you siad love i have told the lawyer about it...please do some thing fast my love cz my life is know in Ur hands OK.. i can not wait to see you.. I love so mach please be absent from girl and wait for me Melissa
Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

You can't believe how excited I am this afternoon. I sold my car!! And I got $4,200 for it!! I really feel like it's all starting to come together!

I've been putting off telling my my friends about us until it looked pretty definite that we were going to be able to get everything done. Now I want to tell everybody!!

Please ask Mr. Williams to send me instructions on how to get the money to him. Or should I just send it to you and you can pay him. That might be better.

Let me know, dear Melissa.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

Love i'am more excited than you ever think about this development God will strenghten you,all you need to do now is to contact the lawyer Mr.Williams and let him know you have raised the money he will give you instructions on how to send him the money.

love let me know as soon as you hear from him.

God bless you as you do this for me.
Love you...... i cant wait to meet you.......

your baby.
Melissa

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

hello sweetheart

how are you doing..?hope you are doing good cz that what am always expecting...hey babe i miss you so mach as u i can wait for that lovely day and alway praying for you too as i expect that from you too...my love i have never heaed from the lawyer yesterday so i dont know what happening now weather the money has been sent to him or not so i was expecting to hear from...sweet heart i always need Ur mail everyday to keep me happy always CZ i want to know happening to you OK....take care of ur self for me and be absent from women..love you so mach

your love
Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Mr. Williams,

I expect to receive money shortly for the sale of my car and I would like to know how to get the $1,350 to you. I would also like to know if you anticipate any further charges after this.

W. Crumbley
Barrister Percy Williams

Attn Weiner,

You have no other charges to pay in securing this document from both the high court and probate office i have asked this question before now.

Please send the money to my name PERCY WILLIAMS by western union i will pick it up once i received the payment details from you.

Thank you.
Bar.Percy Williams...

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear sweetheart

how are you doing hope you are doing good...i miss so mach babe and how has been work this week??sweetheart i don't know what happening now please write to me ok my love. i called the lawyer this morning he you have not sent any thing to him yet my love am confused now, i don't know what to do??? am just preparing to go visit my parent this morning and i miss you so mach so have live this short note for

love you so mach
Melissa

Lewd Noogie

Melissa, my love, you've been a bad girl, Again.

So you did go after Weiner too! I have to hand it to you, you do have that 419 scammer spirit! I'm so disappointed in you.

These are very nice pictures of you, but I gotta say, they could almost be a different person from the Melissa Kojo that I know. Gosh, the difference is amazing!

I haven't said anything to Weiner yet about what I know about you. I'll be online this weekend, maybe we should talk, don't you think?

Remain blessed,
Lewd

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

Sorry it took me so long to write back but I wanted to wait until I could tell you that the deal I made to sell my car was final. I talked with the guy who bought it today and he's coming over Sunday evening to pay for it and pick it up. That means I can send the money to Mr. Williams on Monday. We're getting very close!!

I sent your picture to all my friends and a few of them have written back and said how beautiful you are. I can't wait until you get here so they can meet you in person.

I have a lot of things to do today so I have to keep this short. I'll write again soon.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo
(to Lewd)

dear ,lewis.

how are u doinh hope u doing good it been among time thanks for the mail but i dont get you why did i send different picture to you so i dont really get what you saying in the mail pleas can explain to me ok this is my last chance i have now and that is weinne he is willing to help me now recover my gold..noogie u hae been my good friend and i have been tellling you that i dont di nothing like scam i dont even how to that nor star it am a honest person and you also need to help please ok noogie.. ok dont worrywe will talk this week end and i will be online wiating for u ok so waiting for u...please is what u thinking ok the picture u sent to me are not my real picture of my me and this os very serous we need talk

melissa
Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

Why have you stopped writing to me? Did I say something wrong?

The guy who bought my car came by this morning and paid me for it so tomorrow afternoon I can send the money to Mr. Williams. It looks like you'll have your gold very shortly.

Do you have a passport? If you don't, you should get one and start planning your trip.
Write to me soon,

Your Weiner
Melissa Kojo
(to Lewd)

dear noogie

how are you doing hope you are doing good. i know what am doing is not right but you need to get me that am not lieing to i mean all what i say and i no is not right for me to do this with out you knowing am very sorry but i need help for get my gold that why i was thinking may be he can help me,but please those picture to winner i did not send any picture like that to him and that what am thinking of maybe some using my box with ...is out of frustration that i did that so please mind it in you heat to for give me am really sorry for what happen is that i just need help.and this week i waited but never see online for more chat CZ we need to chat more and we need to find solution..cz am really in hot problem and now everything is now in ur hand is weather he should help me or not...but you se the way am suffering here today and if GOD permit and everything move on well you will see and it will be like a movie to you if only you can come to Chicago for visit or Ur friend wienner will tell you about the good news see i promise to trust and believe and see what happen at the end it will bring joy to you..please get back to me as soon as possible so i know what to do please

please do somthing fast for me if only you care for me as good friend my life on your hand now.

your lovely friend
Melissa

Lewd Noogie

Melissa, dear, I waited several hours for you to come online but you never showed up. I'm sorry you didn't because we really did need to talk.

I told you that as far as you and I are concerned I don't care if you are a scammer. I also told you it makes you more attractive to me. The problem is that I'm not sure that I like the idea of you scamming my friends. However, I want to know more about this scamming stuff and you are the only one I know who can teach me - I'm ready to offer you one of two choices:

1. You admit to me that you are a scammer and you answer my questions about how it works. If you do, I won't say anything to Weiner and I'll just sit back and watch what happens. What you get from him is between you and him.

2. If you keep on denying that you're a scammer or refuse to answer my questions, I'm going to tell Weiner exactly what you're doing. I'll shut down your scam and you'll get nothing from him.

I don't know what you have arranged with him so far but I'm going to send him an email and tell him to hold off sending you any money to you for a couple of days. If you do as I ask, I'll tell him everything is ok. If you don't, your scam comes to an end.

Your choice.
Lewd

Melissa Kojo

[Damage Control...]

(to Weiner Crumbley)

hello sweet heart

how are you doing sorry it took me so long to write to you i was thinking this week has been a very bad week end for me but never mind how is the weather now in chicago ?? please if you send the money to the lawyer tomorrow please let me know so we can do something very fast my love you will not believe what is about to happen when this done to i think it will be the happiest day in your life and it will be like a movie to please try your best to send the money tomorrow as you said i believe you..and pleaseam very sorry to tell you this the person who introduced me to was noogie from Russia he has been a very good friend of mine he has been so helpful and caring to me please you can let him know all what happening bet ween as if only you want to..take care of ur self for me love so mach.. hoping to hear from tommorow as soon as you send the money to the lawyer.. love so mach

ur love
melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dear Melissa,

I don't understand what you are saying - my friend Lewd in Russia sent you to me? But you told me that you found my name in some business or industrial directory. Why would you tell me that if it weren't true? What else have you told me that isn't true?

I'm confused now - I'm going to call Lewd in the morning before I send the money to Mr. Williams to find out what is really going on here.

Weiner
Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I'm sad that I haven't heard from you in so long. I liked it much better when you were writing to me frequently.

I wish I knew what was going on. I talked to my friend Lewd Noogie in Russia and he said that you wanted me to hold off sending the money to your lawyer, at least for a few days. He didn't explain the reason for the delay, just that your lawyer wasn't ready to receive it. How long should I wait before sending it?

I'm still very anxious to get you here to Chicago. Please let me know what the problem is.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear weinner

sorry it took me so long to write to back and reason is that network in Ghana here has be very bad that why.how are you doing i hope you are doing good thanks very mach for the care for me and the way you care for me that the way i care for you.but for now am so disappointed in you for keeping everything so slow and i don't know what going on now you promised to pay the lawyer that was last week Monday for now i don't even know what happening and since we even never meet i believed and trusted all what you told me and now you are disappointing me why..and some of my document are all document are all with you now and i don't know what is delaying or why do want to come to me in Ghana and see for your self CZ i can see now you are losing something in me and that is trust.please i want a final answer please let me know now OK..take care of Ur self

your love
Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I don't understand why you are dissapointed with me. Lewd said you told him that your lawyer wasn't ready to receive the money yet and that I should hold off sending it for a few days. I'm only trying to do what you want. I certainly haven't lost any trust in you.

As much as I would love to come to yor country I just don't see anyway to do that right now. I'm saving the money I got from my car to send to Mr. Williams when he's ready. I also want to buy a few things for you when you get here.

I'll try to contact Lewd and find out what's going on.

Your Weiner
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear wienner

i dont know what to say now everything is in your hands for now if u want to send the please let me and if u dont too let me know...as you we have done evrthing ready and is now left with you for to send the so everthing will be over now so i can come to you....and please do have equity account?please get to my lawyer and send the money to him so everthing will be over now cz am now finding thing difficult and i have no internet my bills has been cut off and some money to pay too.

get back to me

melissa
Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I tried to get ahold of Lewd but with no success. He travels quite a bit so he may be moving around Russia now. I'll keep trying to reach him.

I'm curious as to why you ask if I have an equity account, but there's nothing I want to keep from you. Yes, as a matter of fact I do have a home equity account. Why do you ask?

Just write a few words if that's all ou have time for.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo

dear Noogie

how are you doing hope you are doing good . i just wrote to wienner and he told me that you said he should not send any money but my lawyer is not yet ready for the collecting of the money.noogie you have been my good friend since i dont know dont believe any thing i say you tell me that am scammer for i dont know what to do for you to believe me now and i have done all my best and for now i dont know what to do now and me been here facing many difficulties in my life and i have now got some to help me ..please for get about you seeing melissa on google many people use the name in many thing now.. please tell what to do now for you to let me know that am saying the truth..dont worry i will open msn chat for you by the end of this week so you can see me on cam for you to know my real picture..and kindly send picture of you so i will also the person what you look like.now my life is in your hand .... hope to hear from you soon

Melissa
Melissa Kojo

["Melissa" now invents another imaginary friend with her own pathetic story of wealth just beyond reach.]

(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear wienne

how are u doing hope you are doing good.how has been work thought out this week?now thing are difficult for this transaction CZ is now like noogie is out of town and you are saying with out him the money can not sent.so now what do you think i should do now?and i want to know why you don't want to send the money for the lawyer with out hearing from noogie..and the reason i asked you for the equity is i have one of the best friend whom father was from Florida and the mother from Ghana so the father died some few year ago and she is now living with her mother in Ghana here and thing has been difficult fir then now and within some few month ago they got some information that their had this equity account and there is money in it so she said they called the bank and they said the only help they can offer them is to get another equity so they can transfer the money in it.she asked that do i have some in USA i said yes that my feature husband to be come is there and she said i should ask you and weather help their family out that why i was asking you CZ you are the only one i trust for now in my life that why i want to share everything i have with you but sadly you are disappointing me. take care have nice week end

hope to hear from u soon my love

YOUR LOVE
Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

So good to hear back from you. Of course I will help your friend, just find out what she needs to do to transfer her account and let me know. If she's a friend of yours she's a friend of mine.
I only have a minute so I have to keep this short. Write soon.

Your Weiner
Lewd Noogie

Melissa, my love,

I don't understand you, girlfriend. You keep asking me what you can do to get me to trust you and I keep telling you - stop lying to me. That's the only way I'll ever trust you. If you're honest with me I won't tell Weiner what's really going on, as long as you don't try and scam him for too much. I mean, keep it reasonable, a couple hundred here, a couple hundred there. That won't kill him. But as long as you keep lying to me I'll stop him from sending any money to you. I helped him out of a couple of financial crises and he listens to me when it comes to money.

So it's your choice, mi vida. Tell me the truth and I'll let you make some money off him. Keep lying to me and you'll get nothing.

Remain blessed,
Lewd

Oh, and I STRONGLY recommend that you be online this weekend. We really do need to talk.
Melissa Kojo

dear noogie

i speak nothing but the truth how can lie to you i have told you that i have be honest to you since we meetbut for you dont trut me in anything i tell you.i wrote to wienne he said he need to get intach with before he can send the money he told me that you are out of town for some few weeks now.we really need to talk so if you can meet in ghana time today 4;30pm and if you find some difficulties in time changing you can check that in Google for ghana time.have a nice week end...take care

Melissa
Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

thanks very mach for you helping my friend i have told her about it she was very happy and the family.but she said i should ask you that what is the money limit if ur equity? and she said i should tell you to send the thing need before the money can be sent to you.why tell something now CZ i dont get for now is it that you want to send the money or what? for i need the truth and i have sent the document and i have told you that the gold is my last chance in this life for me..and i have been with for so long and you said many things eg you did not have money so you have sell Ur car first and you told me that it has been done so what should still keeping you waiting??please be honest to me and tell me the truth weather you will or u will not so i know what to do now cz you have confused me since and i need the final truth now?????

reply soon

ur love
Melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I nw you're struggling there but we really should listen to Lewd. He's pretty sharp when it comes to financial matters and I always follow his advice, even if I don't see why he wants me to do something. He's helped me out of some tight spots in the past and he's always been right. Just hang on a little longer - I'm sure everything will work out for the best.

As far as my equity credit line is concerned, it's a bout $250,000. How soon does your friend want to make the transfer? What exactly does she need to make the transfer and how does she want to get her money once I have it?

I still spend hours loking at your pictures and wishing you were here. Don't worry, we'll make it happen quickly.

Your Weiner
Melissa Kojo

dear noogie

i tryed to chat with on sunday but i think you where not arround the computer and i waited and never heared from you so to meet on wenesday nite...am just about going out so i have to lieave this short messege for you.....take care.... have a happy week days hope to see online byeee

melissa
Melissa Kojo

dear weinne

if you say then i will be waiting for you but pleease try as mach as possible to intach with him so everthing can move faster.how has been work this week end? and i hope you are doing good too. for now i have my passport ready so am just waiting for you.i now find it difficult to write to cz of my internet connection...can you help me out to pay my bills c now in ghana public cyber they now hack people box and what ever they want and take other inportant thing in it so i can help me out with just about 200$ ..i have also give noogie an mail but he not yet got back to m yet so am just waiting to her from him..i have told my friendabout the equity she was very happy to hear that from from she send me something to send to you and i think those are the things the bank need from you before the money can transferd to your account. hope to hear from you soon dear take care love so mach

your love
Melissa

Full Name: .....................................
Private Home: ÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉ
Office Telephone number
Email Address: É ÉÉÉÉ
9 Digit Social Security ........
Property AddressÉ
Date of Birth:
Name of Bank ..................
Bank Address:
Bank Toll Free No N/A.:ÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉ
Equity Line of Credit Account No. : N/A ÉÉ
RT NUMBER ÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉÉ
Limit of Line of Equity: N/AÉÉÉÉÉÉ

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

I have a great idea! If you have your passport ready, why don't you just come here now? I would rather spend the money on your airplane ticket than a lawyer. What do you think?

Below is the information that your friend asked for. By the way, what is her name?

Full Name: Weiner Crumbley
Private Home: 5401 S. Cicero Ave., Chicago, IL, 60638
Office Telephone number N/A
Email Address: xxxxxx-xxxxxx@xxxx.com
9 Digit Social Security: 251-29-2286
Property Addres 5400 S. Cicero Ave., Chicago, IL, 60638
Date of Birth: 19 April 1981
Name of Bank: CitiBank
Bank Address: 222 West Adams Street, Chicago, IL, 60527
Bank Toll Free No: 1.800.685.0935
Equity Line of Credit Account No. : 237007701341
RT NUMBER 053000196
Limit of Line of Equity: $250,000

Your Weiner

[The address and phone number are for Midway airport.]

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear wienne

hope u are doing good... i dont think is the right way if you just buy ticket for me to come and what about my gold i think let come together and collect it so if i leave Africa now and come to you i know i dont have anything again so think that the best way.if had sent the money everything by now finished but i dont know what keeping u delaying.i think we need to do something fast now to get everything over now.i have talk to y friend she said by the end of next week the money will sent to your account and she said i should thank you very mach...love you so mach

your love
Melissa

Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear wienner

what is happening to you.are you sure you are OK???i have not heard from since why??? my friend to me that bank requires your personal phone number to contact you. hope everything is OK with you my love

your love
melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

Everything's fine here, I've just been busy at the bar lately. We have Karaoke night 3 times a week now instead of just once like before and Mo Bingo, the owner, is out of town so I have to open mornings. Getting up at 5:00am so the morning regulars can get their eye-opener at 6:00am is a real drag.

I still don't see a real reason why you can't come here now. Your lawyer can handle everything for you there. If there are any papers for you to sign he can Fedex them here and you can sign them and Fedex them back. C'mon, whaddya say? It's still cold here but your Weiner would keep you warm!

C'mon, I need you here,

Your Weiner

ps - the phone number that I sent you is my personal phone.
Melissa Kojo
(to Weiner Crumbley)

dear weinner my love

thanx the mail i will love to there with you my love.. i think i will talk to my lawyer about that.for now i think everthing is coming to an end now..and i can not wait to see in personal. i talk to my friend this night she told me that the form you sent for her you never sent ur personal phone number.

i think they need that before the money can be transferd to you there and the bank will like to talk to as well.kindly send the phone number to me in the next mail.hope to hear from you soon my love alway thinking of you.. love you so much and i will love to be with you for the rest of my life....take care

your love
melissa

Melissa Kojo

dear noogie

the problem now is that you are thinking i dont want to talk to but is what you think also need to talk to as the way you also want it.. and the reason why i don't see you now online is that the place am living now there is no any internet connection there that why ao the little time i get and come onlin to check but i don't see you online please noogie is what you think i told you before that all what tell is not lie is the truth am saying to you and i also think if i can have your personal phone number so i can be calling you for as to talk even if we dont meet online so our disscution can reduce a bit..and that account of his that i got access to was his equity account and that one if for a friend of my that the father a business man and he travels all over the would for many businesses and he now dead for some few year ago and family has been in Ghana for the past 5year now with no will and due to some information they got to know that their father had an account called equity and there is money in it so they called the bank and asked them how they can get the money cz they have all prove to show and now the bank told them that the only way they can help is that they need another equity account to transfer the money in to it and my told me all this and asked me weather if i can help her out with any trusted friend in USA so i told her that i have some there but i will ask and see weather if the person is willing to help her out..and i told wienne about this and he told me that if is my friend then he is will to help her out..and the bank demanded for some in formation from him before the money can be transferred ti his account and he give it out to me ..and i think the transfer will be done by the end of this week.. hope you had a happy week end .. hope to hear from you soon

Melissa
Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

Why haven't you been writing me? Did I say something wrong?

I got a call from Lewd and he told me to lock down my equity account. What is going on? He wouldn't say why but I have a suspicion that something is going on between the two of you. What is this all about?

I contacted the bank and told them that nothing goes in or out of the account until I say so. Tell you're friend she'll have to wait a few days to transfer her money.

Please get back to me about this.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo

Subject: what i have i done wrong to you??

dear noogie

what have i done wrong to i told u that u should stop thinkng bad about me am not in for that ... is just a friend of my whom is asking for help from weiner that all....please talk to him am not wht u think and you are on of my close pal now i have ever had that why i need your trust ok please believe hope to hear from you soon so know what i can do next.....stay blessed

Melissa
Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

i dont know what happenning at the moment why is there something going on or what i have done wrong to...or what are u thinking of ??? is just a help u are just trying to help my friend out.. please if u can get back to noogie and tell him what i have done wrong to him..and i dont know what to tell my frined now ...cz i told him my friend is ready to help her out and now u are saying another think all together please can u also tell me what is going now cz am conffused now??? get back to me soon

Melissa
Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

why does it take so long for you to get back to me??
Lewd Noogie

Melissa,

I saw you left an IM for me tonight. Sorry, but I was too busy to get back to you.
Ok, I'm getting tired of playing games with you. Either you come clean with me and let me watch while you take a little of Weiner's money or I'm gonna shut this thing down. If you come back to me one more time with this, "Oh, what have I done to make you not trust me?" or, "I could never be a scammer!", it's all over.

It's your call, babe. Believe me, I can convince Weiner that you're trying to steal his money. I'd rather watch you pull this thing off but I'm tired of screwing around.

What's it gonna be?
Melissa Kojo

dear noogie

think i will wait for you this week and explain thing to you better
Melissa Kojo

IM Left For Lewd
March 27

why are you doing this to me??? what have i done to you
Lewd

IM Left For Melissa
March 27

Melissa dear, I told you if you came back to me with this horse puckey one more time that I was gonna cut this thing off. You might as well say goodbye to Weiner, your scam is over.
Melissa Kojo

IM Left For Lewd
March 30

how can i waited and wauted for you and i over sleept.
Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

what the problem gave i done something wrong ??? if i have done something wrong tell me ok let me know don't keep that in your heart and use i on me.cz is good at all.. this is my new mail

get back me ok melissa

Weiner Crumbley

Dearest Melissa,

How can you think you've done anything wrong?? Of course you haven't. I talked to my friend Lewd and he said it sounded to him like you were having second thoughts about our relationship and that you needed time to think things over. He also said that he didn't think that you were really someone who would be good for me but I know he's wrong there! I know you would be very good for me.

I presume by now you were able to recover your gold. Do you still plan to send it here? I guess I should ask, what are your plans now? You really should let me know how you feel about us.

I really want to hear from you.
Your Weiner

Melissa Kojo

dear weiner

if there is nothing wrong or i have done thing to you then why dont u write to me and see how am doing?? and my friend still asking me the informations from you...
hope to hear from u soon take care of ur self and stay blessed

melissa
Melissa Kojo

IM Conversation Between Lewd and Melissa Kojo
Friday, 9 April

hello
Lewd Noogie
Well hello there.
Melissa Kojo
yes am here
thank GOD i meet o today
Lewd Noogie
Nice to talk to you again.
Melissa Kojo
same here to..how are you doing??
Lewd Noogie
I'm doing well. And you?
Melissa Kojo
am doing fine too..as u know we many thing to talk about
Lewd Noogie
What would you like to talk about?
Melissa Kojo
about weinner
Lewd Noogie
I spoke with Weiner not long ago. I still haven't said anything about you trying to scam him but I'm going to very soon.
Melissa Kojo
cz anything i saw to him he only tell me that he need to see u
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, he trusts me.
Melissa Kojo
ok
Lewd Noogie
So are you ready to tell me the truth?
Melissa Kojo
yes i am
Lewd Noogie
So tell me.
Melissa Kojo
as u know before i meet is throught u but for u dont believe anything i say
Lewd Noogie
And you were trying to scam me and then him, right?
Melissa Kojo
no i told u that i dont scam
Lewd Noogie
But you TRY to scam.
Melissa Kojo
how??
Lewd Noogie
Because there is no gold, never was.
Melissa Kojo
why do u say that..i can not lie to any like u trying ti help me out
Lewd Noogie
Ok, you told me that your husband's name was Harry. What did you tell Weiner your husband's name was?
Melissa Kojo
yes harry
Lewd Noogie
No. The paper you sent him said your husband's name was Joseph. So he couldn't find it on the internet.
Melissa Kojo
plz can u send that to my mail so i can have a look at that
Lewd Noogie
I don't have it, he read it to me over the phone.
Melissa Kojo
ok the i will contact him and ask him..ooh ok that why u dont believe me
Lewd Noogie
I don't believe you for many reasons.
But I'm getting tired of playing with you. I told you if you didn't tell me the truth the scam was going to end.
And since you're not going to tell me the truth the scam is over. I'm going to explain everything to Weiner tomorrow.
Melissa Kojo
which scam?
Lewd Noogie
Nice one Melissa, you know which scam.
Melissa Kojo
ok
ok the black girl picture u saw was me but the one i sent u was not me
Lewd Noogie
Now we're getting somewhere.
Melissa Kojo
that is my realy pics i sent to weiner..but i lied to you
Lewd Noogie
I'm falling in love all over again!
Melissa Kojo
hahahahahaha
no i want to be truthful to u may u can help me in many ways
Lewd Noogie
If you're truthful, yes, I can help you.
Melissa Kojo
so let me be open with u
Lewd Noogie
Talk to me, baby!
Melissa Kojo
there is nothing like gold i was lieing to u and wiener
Lewd Noogie
Oh baby, you are so hot!
Melissa Kojo
cz i have been passing throuh many bad things in africa.
Lewd Noogie
I respect you for being truthful
Melissa Kojo
yes i will to..and the friend asked me to another white pic in this
so i start that with u
bbut to wiener i sent him the right pic of me
and the reason why am doing this is that a friend told me i could make through it help me myself to the univercity
but when i tried i saw be truthful and use ur own picture may be GOD can send some to help me out but if am lieing to people that i have gold can not slove the problem cz the way u have been so caring to that why i want to open up with u
Lewd Noogie
Tell your friend big tactical mistake to send different pictures to two different people who know each other.
Melissa Kojo
yes
Lewd Noogie
Have you or your friend made any money from anyone else with this?
Melissa Kojo
yes she has one man from florida who has been sending her money
Lewd Noogie
Nice work!
Melissa Kojo
she use that to help her self in her education by book and paying her feees
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, I hear there are a lot of crazy people in Florida. I hope your friend didn't take too much.
Melissa Kojo
hmm i dont really but i dont think so
Lewd Noogie
So what was your plan with getting the information for Weiner's equity account? You're not gonna clean it out, are you? I can't let you take THAT much.
Melissa Kojo
no for that one is different
Lewd Noogie
How?
Melissa Kojo
for that is true bussines and not scam..i promise
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, right. I read up on that scam so I know how it works. You don't need all the information you got from him if it's not a scam.
All you would need is his account number.
Melissa Kojo
for that i dont know about that
Lewd Noogie
C'mon Melissa, you were doing so well there for a minute.
Melissa Kojo
i promise to GOD this the only i did.. was not in it for so long just some few month
Lewd Noogie
Well, then your friend wants to clean out his account and I can't let that happen.
If it was you and you promised just to take a couple hundred, maybe a thousand even, I'd say no problem.
But if it's not you I'm gonna tell Weiner to keep his account locked down.
Melissa Kojo
but for that i dont know..but she told me that they will transfer money in to it for to send it
Lewd Noogie
I don't think you're telling me the truth but no problem - it ain't gonna happen.
Melissa Kojo
ok if u dont believe there
Lewd Noogie
I don't.
Melissa Kojo
believe me ok i can not keep any lie agians u..i have made up my mind to be open to u
Lewd Noogie
So how long do you plan to keep doing this?
Melissa Kojo
i have stopped
Lewd Noogie
C'mon, Melissa, this is the Lewdster your talking to. You're not gonna stop, no way!
Melissa Kojo
why u saw no way
Lewd Noogie
Because you have no reason to stop and every reason to keep going.
Melissa Kojo
no i can not
Lewd Noogie
Why not?
Melissa Kojo
i want to give my life to GOD and stop stealing people
Lewd Noogie
THAT's no fun! I like you much better this way!
Melissa Kojo
why??
Lewd Noogie
I told you many times before, it's sexy. Your scamming made me fall in love with you.
Melissa Kojo
hmmmm how..but that is not good
Lewd Noogie
Sure it's good. It makes you mysterious, a little dangerous, kinda like a biker chick, and to a guy like me that's like a drug. So. If I agree not to say anything to Weiner, what's your plan?
Melissa Kojo
ok i will be open to u.. my plan is to get something small from him to help my self in school
Lewd Noogie
Ok, no problem. I won't say anything to him and I'll tell him he should start writing to you again.
Melissa Kojo
he is ue friend and i promised not to do that agian
Lewd Noogie
Yeah, he's my friend but I like to dick with him a little
Melissa Kojo
why
Lewd Noogie
We play jokes on each other all the time. He once got me drunk and convinced me to marry a hooker and now's my chance to get him back.
Melissa Kojo
hahahaha
Lewd Noogie
So you and I are in this together. We're like Bonnie and Clyde. I am LOVING this!!
Melissa Kojo
am comfused now i dont know what to say to u
Lewd Noogie
What are you confused about?
Melissa Kojo
about the deal we are doing
Lewd Noogie
Well, the deal is that you can get what you can from Weiner and I won't say anything to him about what I know. Maybe someday 5 years from now I'll tell him about it. He'll be pissed off at first but when he sees the the joke he'll laugh his ass off.
Ok, I have work to do. Maybe we can meet here tomorrow. I'll send Weiner an email tonight and tell him you're ok.
Melissa Kojo
but i stil find it difficult to do that
Lewd Noogie
Ahh, don't worry about it.
Melissa Kojo
can i have a picture of u
Lewd Noogie
Sure. I think I have one somewhere on the other computer here in the office. I'll see if I can find it tonight.
Melissa Kojo
ok i will be waiting for it can u help me with some small for my self if u dont mind
Lewd Noogie
We'll talk about that tomorrow.
Melissa Kojo
ok
Lewd
You should know that you turn me on more than any other woman I've ever known. We're gonna get married someday!
Melissa Kojo
hhahahaha
Lewd Noogie
I'm serious!
Melissa Kojo
ok
i believe it will come true ond day and i will amny thing to tell u out of experience
Lewd Noogie
As excited as you make me I hope you like kids 'cause you're gonna have about 30 of 'em after we're married!
Melissa Kojo
hahahahahahaha
u so funny but that is to much
Lewd Noogie
Ok babe, I gotta get to work. Talk to you tomorrow.
Melissa Kojo
ok

[At this point - after three months of wasted time - it seems "Melissa" decided to find someone more scammable.]


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