YORKIE JERKY

A hearty scam-o-welcome back to Gene Rayburn, last seen in A STAR ISN'T BORN, in which Universal Studios Lagos cruelly toyed with Gene's hopes for movie stardom, and A PERFECT MATCH, a gripping tale of venture capital in the realm of teleportation. Here, the Lads offer a puppy for adoption. His probable fate as puppy chow doesn't seem to disturb them.

Cast, in order of appearance:

REV. BILL LONG: Lad disposing of puppy
who (through lack of Lad quality control, combined with hasty backing and filling on their part) becomes
REV. COLLIN OAKLEY: Rev. Long's 'wife' (and alter ego)

versus
GENE RAYBURN: background co-ordinator
JOHN SLUGGO: His mean boss

Featuring cute puppy pic, scammer chat transcript, and Yorkie Jerky package design by Gene Rayburn


Rev. Bill Long
From: rev bill long <sllvesterpets@yahoo.co.uk>
Date: September 26, 2007 8:32:57 PM
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Subject: adorable female yorkie for adoption
Reply-To: billlong10@gmail.com

Hello

MY NAME IS REV Bill Long i AM FROM TEXAS, I AND MY WIFE ARE ON A CHRISTIAN MISSION TO AFRICA AND I CAME ALONG WITH OUR PUPPY. AFTER A WEEK WE ARRIVE I NOTICE THAT THE AFRICAN WEATHER IS NOT GOOD FOR THE PUPPY (YORKIE) AND I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF HER THE WAY I ALWAYS DO BECAUSE OF MY JOB. I NEED A SOMEONE TO ADOPT HER AND TAKE CARE OF HER THE
WAY I ALWAYS DO. IF YOU CAN TAKE GOOD CARE OF HER DO SEND A REPLY AND I WILL EMAIL YOU HER PICTURES TO YOU IF YOU ARE INTRESTED.
I HOPE TO READ FROM YOU.
REGARDS
REV Bill Long
Gene Rayburn
Date: Thu, 27 Sep 2007
Hello,

I'm so glad you wrote to me regarding your puppy. Can you please give me some more information:

1) What is the total weight of the dog?
2) Is it a male or female?
3) What is the puppy's name?
4) What have you been feeding him/her?

I have some more questions, but please respond as soon as you can. I believe I can help you.

Sincerely,
Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Thu, 27 Sep 2007 12:10:01 +0200
From: "bill long" <billlong10@gmail.com>

Hello

Thanks for your interest in my pet. The York Shire Terrier (puppy) is still very much available adoption. she is 14 weeks old, weigh 2.5 lbs and will weight big when full grown.This little girl is adorable. She is Akc Registered And Checked and the puppy health is 100 % OK, current on all shot, My puppy is current on vaccinations and worming with A Year Health Guarantee also the puppy is potty trained and home raised and socialized for tremendous attitude,excellent temperament, super train ability and has that special people pleasing personality.she is vet checked,but right now i am in Africa on a Christian mission with my husband, we have the puppy right here with us. We are going to ship to you via express delivery on next day delivery to a shipping you at the airport, so if you are interested in having the puppy, i want you to get back to me with your Full name,Address including the Nearest airport to you. Please if you know that you are not going to take very good care of my baby, do not reply me so i will like you to get back to me with the information require in interested ,also she is not house broken not spayed and have good relationship with kids, and all papers would come from the customs as well that you need to show the customs.As well the pup is up to date on shots and will also vet check the pup before i ship the pup

Breed: Yorkshire Terrier
Sex: Female

I want you to know all the items above will be shipped with the puppy to you to i will be shipping to you all the necessary document because they have been tested by a licensed vet doctor and i want you to know that the puppy is100% good and ready for shipment and she likes to play with all the family and has a good companion with children and other pets,I want to confirm if you want the information for the puppy.

Information for the shipment.

Age:::::::::::::::::::14 Weeks she weigh 2.5 lbs

Adoption price /Shipping Fee ........$310 If you can pay her that ?

please kindly Get Back To Me With The Informations Below If You Are Interested :

Full Name:
Contact Address:
Nearest Airport:
City:
State:
Contact Phone Number:
nearest airport or would you prefer the baby to
deliver to your
door-step?
name on the Tag: katti

Let me know if you would like some puppy grooming and feeding guide magazines so that I can include them in the shipping.

Am Located now in AFRICA

Where are you located?
can you afford the price?

I really want you to promise me that you will take very good care of my baby.

Looking forward to read from you asap.
Thanks again for your love and caring for my adorable baby

Await to Read from you
Rev collin oakley



[You may pause for a brief "awwww". OK that's enough. Moving right along - ]

Gene Rayburn
Date: Thu, 27 Sep 2007

Hello!

What an adorable pooch! All of the information you provided sounds great. However, you failed to answer one of my questions, which is quite crucial to my expectations. I refer to question #4. Please answer it at once.

I want you to be assured that I will take care of your baby to the extent she deserves. I have some very specific plans, which I can go into with you later, but I can tell you that they are perfectly christian.

Also, please tell me more about your mission. Are you spreading the word? What religion are most of the people there, and how are they receiving your gospel? I really admire the work you do, and might be able to help out. I've always been a strong supporter of the cause.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

hello Gene Rayburn
she love to eat cheesy bone cookies , doggies dough nuts chicken liver cookies and veggie biscuits, i am working with Christ embassy here in Nigeria , yes we are planning to spreed world wide we have branches in United Kingdom , new Zealand , south Africa and many more .

please kindly Get Back To Me With The Informations Below If You Are Interested :

Full Name:
Contact Address:
Nearest Airport:
City:
State:
Contact Phone Number:
nearest airport or would you prefer the baby to deliver to your door-step?

await to read from you now and if there is anything you want to know kindly get back to me
Gene Rayburn
Date: Thu, 27 Sep 2007

Hello Again,

Thanks for the answer. That is very good. I was wondering if you could feed her some meat in the few days before you ship her my way. I mean real meat with some nice amount of marbling on it? She will need to be well fed for the flight.

Can you give me a bit more information about how the shipping will work? Will you be using FedEx?

Here is the contact information:

Full Name: Gene Cornelius Rayburn
Contact Address: 810 Virginia St., Seattle, WA 98101
Nearest Airport: Seattle/Tacoma International Airport
City: Seattle
State: Washington
Contact Phone Number: (206) 202-0717

I'm so sorry that you are unable to care for Katti, but your loss is my gain. I have a very large home where Katti can run free. We have been blessed by the great success of our specialty jerky business. It's amazing what a dehydrator and some packaging materials and the finest quality exotic meats can do.

Please let me know about the shipping, whether you'll be able to find some heartier food for Katti, and more about the local people there. What is their religion before you convert them?
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

hello Gene Rayburn

thanks for the reply , yes i could do that by feeding her some meat before the is been shipped , also regarding the shipping she will be shipped via delta pet air cargo or Fed ex shipping company it depend on the one you prefer

also thanks for the contact information where the puppy will be delivery <snipped>

regarding the peoples over there most of them are idol worshiper and Muslim i have converted more than 100 of them and they have been attending church services since then .

also i will want you to know that you have to pay the money for her shipping to the shipper information which will be given to you when you are ready to pay for her.

also i want to know if you pay for her today so that she can be ready for the joruney

await to read from you

REV BILL LONG
Gene Rayburn
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

Dear Rev,

Thank you for the info. I have no problem paying for the shipping. But I will need to see the paperwork you mentioned in your original e-mail before I spend any money. Can you please scan the records (medical, etc.) and e-mail them to me as soon as possible?

Great job on the conversions.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

i do not have a scanner here i would have love to proof to you that it is real not a scam nor hoax , but there is 100 percent assurances that the paper works of the puppy will be delivery to you by the shipper when you receive the puppy at Nearest Airport: Seattle/Tacoma international Airport , please kindly get back to me if you are ready to make the payment so that i can contact the shipper

await to read from me if you are willing to adopt .
REV COLLIN OAKLEY
Gene Rayburn
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

Dear Collin,

In an earlier e-mail you said that you are Bill's wife, but are you a reverend too?

I'm sure it's not a scam or anything, but I really need to know that the dog is disease free. We've had some problems in the past with animals we have "adopted" and some diseases that were passed on to our distributors (even through the shrink-wrap).

If you don't have a scanner, do you have a fax machine?

Thanks,
Gene
Rev. Bill Long/Collin Oakley
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

hello
thanks for the reply yes i m a reverend too also i want you to know that she is free from any form of diseases .no i do not have a fax machine but i will try to ask one of our member he have some one that have if so that i can fax all the informations to you .

also i want to know if you have more questions to ask about her.

await to read from you
Gene Rayburn
Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2007

Collin,

That's great news. I'm sure that one of your flock will help you out. Once I receive the paperwork, I'll be ready to go. I've already started preparing my facility, including the kitchen where she will be naturally be spending the balance of her time.

Another alternative to a fax machine would be to take a photograph of the paperwork and e-mail them to me like you e-mailed the pictures of the dog.

I hope that you've already started feeding her a meat-rich diet in anticipation of getting this going?

Thanks,
Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Sat, 29 Sep 2007

thanks for the reply . we could not see any one here with a fax machine , the one we could have used was faulty .i dont think there is any other option i can used i do promise you that you will have all the paper work be i trust in God and nothing else .

so get back to me if there something you can work out
Gene Rayburn
Date: Sat, 29 Sep 2007

Dearest Collin,

I am very sorry to hear that. It is crucial that I get that paperwork. Where exactly are you located?

Another thing you could do (as I mentioned before) would be to use the same camera you used to take the pictures of Katti to take a picture of the documents, then send me the digital picture. I assume that the papers were made by a vet there in Africa, and is handwritten?

Please get back to me soon. We are really working hard to get everything ready here, and our distributors are insisting on seeing *some* paperwork, even if it's just scribbled on a local piece of African paperwork with a seal on it.

I trust you perfectly well. It's just the distributors...I can't control them.

Thanks,
Gene
Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

Bill,

I am going to be at the bank today, so it would be the best day to get this resolved. I am worried that I have not heard from you. Is Katti alright? Also, I have an idea to use your name on our packaging ("Approved by Reverend Bill Long").

I would be able to pay you something to allow me to use your name, of course. Can you tell me what you would charge me for that?

I would really like to get this transaction done today (for the dog's sake). And the folks here really want a puppy, not a full-grown dog. They are very excited about the markup involved. Every day we wait could ruin our plans.

Please get back to me.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

hello
thanks for the reply , i have been trying to do that but it wont work , yes katti is alright, the name that will be on the package will be the shipper names not mine .as i told you that all the paper works of the puppy will be delivery by the shipper .please kindly get back to me if that is acceptable .

await to read from you so that i can contact the shipper to pick her up for the delivery .

email me now

[Note that in the next e-mail, I took the questions from a real veterinary form, but added my own few questions at the end (in green)]

Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

Hello Collin/Bill,

I think I confused you. I don't want to use your name on the shipping package. I want to use your (Bill's) name on one of our processed exotic meat packages. It just adds some credibility to it to have approval from a Reverend of your caliber. You just need to let me know how much you want me to pay you for that. I cannot go over $2000 US, but I can send it to you at the same time as the money for the shipping if you want. Please let me know soon, because I am going to the bank today.

I understand that you are unable to provide a veterinarian form. Here's what we should do. I got a template for a form from a local vet. If you just send me the answers to these questions, I can fill it in and sign on your vet's behalf. The distributors won't know the difference.

Here are the questions on the form, please fill them out as best you can.
Time is of the essence:


Owner:
Date of form:
Pet name:
Breed:
Color:
Age:
Sex:
If Male, Neutered?
If Female, Spayed?
Your dog was obtained from: (Breeder, pet store, friend, stray, Humane Society, or other)
Your dog is: (indoor, outdoor, or both)
Brand of pet food: (canned, or dry)
How is your dog's appetite: (normal or other)
How is your dog's attitude: (Happy-active-normal, depressed-lethargic, other)
Is your dog drinking (normally, more, less than usual)

Do you notice any of the following:
Limping?
Eye discharge?
Nasal discharge?
Sneezing?
Coughing?
Shaking head?
Scooting?
Scratching?
Vomiting?
Diarrhea?
Lumps?
Bad breath often?
Weight loss?
Lethargy/Weakness?
Seizures?
Hair Loss?
Pain or Straining when urinating/defecating?

Previous veterinary hospital:
Has your dog had any of the following in the last 12 months:
Physical exam?
If yes, date:
Dental examination and cleaning?
If yes, date:
Fecal sample test:
If yes, date:
Blood testing for kidney and liver function?
If yes, date:

Has your dog been vaccinated against the following in the last 12 months:
Rabies?
If yes, date:
Canine distemper?
If yes, date:
Lyme disease?
If yes, date:
Canine cough?
If yes, date:

Has your dog been dewormed in the last 12 months?
If yes, date:

Flea and tick preventatives:
Heartworm preventatives:
Please measure and provide the length (in centimeters) of the gizzard:

If male, circumference of testicles (if not neutered):
If female, are the tits currently producing milk?

Has the animal mated with another animal, as far as you know?
If yes, was it within the same breed?
If not the same breed, was it within the same species?

Current medication and allergies:



Thanks again for going through this with me. It will make my distributors happy, and I'll make a photocopy of it and pretend it was scanned.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

thanks for the responses , yes i will use my name on the shipping package , also all the question asked as been filled you can check it .also you have to send the shipper the money that will used in shipping her

I received the booking of the puppy flight and the puppy has not been shipped because we have not confirmed payment through western union.

The shipping of the puppy to your home is $550 and $50 for care/feeding in transit, which amount total of $600.

You are to pay the shipping charges via western union for immediate processing.

ORIGIN :- NG
DESTINATION :- USA

Payment should be made through western union to the information given below.

Name: Folarin Gbolahan
Address: 67, way street
City: Surulere
State: Lagos
Country: Nigeria
Zip code: 23401

The puppy will be arriving tomorrow, you shall receive her by 4PM tomorrow, You shall receive the confirmation by email, or you can give me your contact phone number so as soon as the pup gets shipped, i can let you know the shipping details.

The puppy will be arranged for the next flight we work with once payment is confirmed.

Do email me the information below for the payment can be verified and the shipping can Commence.
Below are the transfer details i will be needing.

MTCN Number:
Full Senders Name:
Security question: IN GOD
Security answer: WE TRUST
sender address:

As soon as payment is received and shipping is made, you must provide a valid ID or International Passport to claim the puppy at the airport. Do you have that?
I expect to read from you soon.

> Owner: Collin Oakley
> Date of form:06-11-2007
> Pet name:
> Breed:Yorkie
> Color:DARK TAN
> Age:15 weeks now
> Sex: Female
> If Male, Neutered?
> If Female, Spayed? NO
> Your dog was obtained from: (Breeder, pet store, friend, stray, Humane > Society, or other) Breeder
> Your dog is: (indoor, outdoor, or both) both
> Brand of pet food: (canned, or dry) dry
> How is your dog's appetite: (normal or other) normal
> How is your dog's attitude: (Happy-active-normal, depressed-lethargic, > other)
> Is your dog drinking (normally, more, less than usual) Normally
>
> Do you notice any of the following:
> Limping? NO
> Eye discharge? NO
> Nasal discharge? NO
> Sneezing? NO
> Coughing? NO
> Shaking head? YES
> Scooting? NO
> Scratching? NO
> Vomiting? NO
> Diarrhea?NO
> Lumps? NO
> Bad breath often? NO
> Weight loss? YES
> Lethargy/Weakness?
> Seizures? NO
> Hair Loss? NO
> Pain or Straining when urinating/defecating? NO
>
> Previous veterinary hospital:
> Has your dog had any of the following in the last 12 months:
> Physical exam?
> If yes, date: 07-25-2007
> Dental examination and cleaning?
> If yes, date:08-11-2007
> Fecal sample test:
> If yes, date::08-11-2007
> Blood testing for kidney and liver function?
> If yes, date: :08-17-2007
>
> Has your dog been vaccinated against the following in the last 12 months:
> Rabies?
> If yes, date:NO
> Canine distemper?
> If yes, date:NO
> Lyme disease?
> If yes, date:NO
> Canine cough?
> If yes, date:NO
>
> Has your dog been dewormed in the last 12 months?
> If yes, date: NO
>
> Flea and tick preventatives: NO
> Heartworm preventatives: NO
>
> Please measure and provide the length (in centimeters) of the gizzard:NO
>
> If male, circumference of testicles (if not neutered):
> If female, are the tits currently producing milk? NO
>
> Has the animal mated with another animal, as far as you know? NO
> If yes, was it within the same breed? YES
> If not the same breed, was it within the same species?
>
Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

Dear Collin,

Thank you. You left out some questions, which I have reiterated in the bottom of this e-mail. You must answer them, so that I know what to put down.

Also, you still seem to be confused about the use of Bill's name, and what you will charge me for that. I have no problem paying the $550 for shipping the dog, but I need to know what you are going to charge me to be able to use his name on the jerky packaging, and whether or not it is okay for me to send that money to the shipper as well. I have attached our graphic arts department's rendering of what the packaging will look like for your approval and for you to provide me with a price as soon as possible, so that I can send it all through western union today.

Let me make it easier for you -

I, Collin Oakley have viewed the attached JPG file and approve of the packaging, and the use of the canine for providing the materials required for what goes in the packaging. In return, I request $______ as a license fee in compensation for the use of Reverend Bill Long's name.

Also, here are the questions you missed:

Pet name:
How is your dog's attitude: (Happy-active-normal, depressed-lethargic, other)
Please measure and provide the length (in centimeters) of the gizzard:

Thanks very much. I'm really glad that you don't have any problems with the use of dear Katti to bring gastronomic joy to our most loyal customers. Some of the clergy here in the US have difficulty with our ways, but it's good to hear that you know what's right in the world.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

hello thanks for the reply ,i will charge you not for the name bill , all the charges will $700 but you have to pay 600 first and when you receive the puppy you send the remaining charges, ALSO THE REMAINING INFORMATIONS HAVE BEEN PROVIDE . SO KINDLY GET BACK TO ME WITH THE western union DETAILS .ALSO YOU WILL NEVER REGRET HAVE KATTI AT YOU STORE.

Pet name:KATTI
How is your dog's attitude: (Happy-active-normal, depressed-lethargic, other) Happy-active-normal
Please measure and provide the length (in centimeters) of the gizzard
Measurements(cm)20-24
Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

Collin, I'm so glad you won't be charging me too much for the use of the name. I just need your approval (as a Reverend) from the artwork I attached, and approval to kill Katti in order to use her meat in the packaging. Please confirm this is okay? Also, where do I go to do the western union?
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

where do i put Reverend Bill long , also you can send the money at any western union location .
Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

Just send me a reply to this e-mail saying that it's okay to use his name on the packaging (please see the artwork on my previous e-mail, attached as a JPG), and that it's okay (and that Bill Long thinks it is okay) to kill the dog when it gets here in order to harvest its meat for sale in Jerky packaging with his name on them. How do I find a western union near me? Can you tell me where it is from my address?
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

hello thanks for the reply, i cannot get the jpg file which i will fill , also you can help me fill it because i cannot get it here , also you can find the western union at any near by store or banks , it late here and i am going to bed so kindly get back to me with the details when the monies is sent so that she can be shipped await to read from you tomorrow
Gene Rayburn
Date: Mon, 1 Oct 2007

I can send you the file in a different format if you want (PDF, GIF, TIF, BMP, or whatever you want). Please let me know what you can read. It is critical that you tell me the photo is okay, and especially that Bill Long feels it is okay to kill the dog when it gets here. Can you assure me that he will be okay with that? I can't send the money until you confirm that it's okay to kill the dog and that the picture of the bag meets with his approval.
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

hello
you can send it on a PDF file
Gene Rayburn
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

Here you go.
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

it s been download and i do not see the place to fill you can fill it by your self ?
Gene Rayburn
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

There is nothing to fill in. I just need you to tell me that Bill says it is okay, since it has his name at the top.
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

hello

yes mr bill say it is ok, kindly get back to when the funds is sent
Gene Rayburn
Date: Tue, 2 Oct 2007

Collin,

Great news. Can you also confirm that Mr. Bill says that it is okay to kill the dog when it gets here (for the meat), and that as a christian he has no issues with that?

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Wed, 3 Oct 2007

ok i will await the payment details via western union today.Payment should be made through western union to the information given below.

Name: Folarin Gbolahan
Address: 67, way street
City: Surulere
State: Lagos
Country: Nigeria
Zip code: 23401

The puppy will be arriving tomorrow, you shall receive her by 4PM tomorrow, You shall receive the confirmation by email, or you can give me your contact phone number so as soon as the pup gets shipped, i can let you know the shipping details.

The puppy will be arranged for the next flight we work with once payment is confirmed.

Do email me the information below for the payment can be verified and the shipping can Commence.
Below are the transfer details i will be needing.

MTCN Number:
Full Senders Name:
Security question: IN GOD
Security answer: WE TRUST
sender address:

await to read from you now

Collin,
Gene Rayburn

[It seems I'm not getting through here. He's sent the western union "money script" again.
I logged in to GMail on 10/4/07 at 2:15pm and saw Bill Long on GMail chat, so I decided to confront him:

[2:15 PM]
me: Are you a scammer?

[2:17 PM]
bill: no
i sent all the informations needed
so if you will it up to you

me: No, you still haven't sent the answer to the important request. Is this Bill or Collin?

[2:18 PM]
bill: bill
me: I need confirmation that it is okay to kill the dog when it gets here in order to use the meat in our packages for exotic jerky.

[2:19 PM]
bill: why will you kill my puppy
me: Collin said it will be fine.
I run a company that makes specialty meats and dehydrates them.
Our customers pay a lot of money for puppy meat.
If this is not okay, please let me know. I have not gone to western union yet.
I can't believe that Collin hasn't told you any of this. She told me that she has been in contact with you.

bill: ok kill her

[2:22 PM] me: Okay, thank you. I just needed your approval.
Now, all I need to do is tell the distributors. They've asked to see the medical records, which I have filled in based on Collin's answers to the medical questions. Then I will go to western union with the details Collin sent me.


[2:23 PM] bill: ok
no problen
no problem

me: Thank you for your kindness. And thanks for the great work you are doing out there.

[2:24 PM]
bill: om will the payment be sent today

[2:25 PM]
me: That is my plan. I just needed to hear that you approved the killing, and now I will bring the medical documents I made up to the distributors. They will give me the okay and I will go straight to western union from the distributors. I will send an e-mail to you and Collin as soon as I return this afternoon.

[2:26 PM]
bill: ok
me: Do you miss Texas?

[2:27 PM]
bill: yes of course
i will be back by next year

me: That's good. You can get a new dog when you get back.

[2:29 PM]
bill: ok
me: I'm leaving for the distributors' office now. I'll talk to you later.

[2:30 PM]
bill: ok
email me when you are back


Gene Rayburn
Date: Wed, 3 Oct 2007

Collin,

I had a nice conversation with Mr. Bill today on Gmail chat. He approved the killing. However, there is a serious problem.

You have made me look like a fool!

I went to my distributers this afternoon, with the medical documents that I have made up based on your answers to the questions, and they were not happy.

I had told them that Katti had been vaccinated and de-wormed, as per your original reply to me:

"My puppy is current on vaccinations and worming with A Year Health Guarantee..."

However, in your responses to the medical questions:

> Has your dog been vaccinated against the following in the last 12 months:
> Rabies?
> If yes, date:NO
> Canine distemper?
> If yes, date:NO
> Lyme disease?
> If yes, date:NO
> Canine cough?
> If yes, date:NO
>
> Has your dog been dewormed in the last 12 months?
> If yes, date: NO

In addition, I filled in the question about shaking head with a "YES" answer, as you did in your responses. Apparently, this is a very bad sign of infection, and I believe Katti is sick.

> Shaking head? YES

They were so angry with me that the owner of the distributer (Mr. Sluggo) hit me over the head with a hammer.

Please ask Mr. Bill to take Katti to the vet and have those vaccinations done immediately. Also, have the vet look at the shaking head syndrome to rule out any other illness.

Once you have told me that you have had the vaccinations done and ruled out the shaking head disease, I will make up a new document and show it to Sluggo. He will then approve the sending of the money for the shipping.

Please don't make me look foolish again. We need to get this going, as I have many customers who are waiting for this to get resolved.

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007

hello thanks for
the reply , the puppy is fine there is nothing wrong with the puppy Mr Collin Must Have Made some mistake since he not the owner of the puppy .
this are the reply to the question where he made the mistake
Has your dog been vaccinated against the following in the last 12 months:
Rabies?
If yes, date:YES
Canine distemper?
If yes, date:YES
Lyme disease?
If yes, date:YES
Canine cough?
If yes, date:YES

Has your dog been dewormed in the last 12 months?
If yes, date: YES

Shaking head? NO

so kindly get back me mr bill long when you show your distributor this message .
await to read from you
Gene Rayburn
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007

Dear Mr. Bill,

You nearly got me bludgeoned again with a ball-peen hammer. When I was on my way to Sluggo this morning, I had a look at the newly faked medical certificate I made up, when I noticed that I had put in "YES" under the part that asks for the dates of the vaccinations. You did not give me those dates!

Please, it is very important that the puppy get shipped so that she still a puppy by the time she gets here! Stop playing games with me.

Give me the dates of the vaccinations as soon as possible.

Also, can you tell me when her head stopped shaking?

Gene
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007

hello

thanks for the reply the date of the vaccinations is 08-11-2007 for all,also she dont used to shake her head ,so kindly get back to me when ready to make the payment
John Sluggo
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007
To: billlong10@gmail.com
Subject: Puppy Chow

Dear Mr. Bill,

I am John Sluggo, the owner of the distribution company that handles Gene Rayburn's exotic beef jerky business.

Please do not tell Gene that I contacted you directly. I think that he may be forging certain documents that he has been showing me regarding a puppy that you are meant to be sending to him, for use in providing meat for a new line of "Yorky Jerky" he is producing.

We have several customers who are very interested in this product line. I need to know several things:

1) Did you deliver the veterinary medical certificate that Bill delivered to us? He told us that your veterinarian filled it out, but he has now delivered it to us twice, with an extraordinarily quick turnaround for a veterinarian in Africa, and the fields and dates keep changing. I just need to confirm with you that your veterinarian filled it out.

2) Are you satisfied with your dealings with Gene? We have had some problems with him in the past, and have needed to resort in corporal punishment in order to bring him in line.

3) Would you be interested in dealing with Sluggo directly? I can probably offer you a much better price than Rayburn.

Again, please do not tell Gene we corresponded. Our mutual friend Mr. Hand is dear to us both, and I wouldn't want any sort of problem.

Sincerely,

Sluggo
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello john sluggo
how are you today , yes i do deliver the certificate that was deliver to you , also it was my veterinarian filled it out, also i am satisfied dealings with Gene, i don't have any problem with him he a nice man , also i will not mind dealing with gene or you .

so kindly get back to me when you are ready to make the payment
John Sluggo
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007

Dear Mr. Bill,

I'm glad to hear that you will work with me. Let's cut Gene out of the deal this time. He told me you are charging him $2000 for the pup. I will pay $3000. Let me know, and please don't tell him.

Sluggo
Gene Rayburn
Date: Thu, 4 Oct 2007

The good news is that I went to western union. The bad news is that I was unable to send the money. The people there told me that I shouldn't send you money, because you are in Nigeria? They said that it was probably a scam. I explained to them that it is not a scam, and I explained to them that you are just sending me a puppy to take care of. I even showed them pictures of the puppy! Still, they suggested I never talk to you again.

I know this is not a scam, so I'm trying to figure out what to do. Do you have any means other than western union that we could use? I didn't like being accused by them.

After western union, I went to see Sluggo, and he asked me put the shipment on hold :-(

It was very suspicious. I do not know why he suddenly had a change of heart. Can you think of any reason? Anyway, he's asked for three days for his board of directors to decide.

I think I should use a different distributor. But the problem with going with M.A.D. as opposed to S.N.L. is that they haven't been around as long, yet they charge more for advertising. So, we can wait 3 days for Sluggo at SNL, or we can go with MAD right away. If we go with MAD, I cannot send you all $700. I can only send $250.

Please tell me what you want to do.
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

hello
thanks for the reply the , that i am in Nigeria does not mean that they will not allow you to send the monies , that for the good comment issues to them at western union outlet.yes the money can be sent via money gram .also you can wait for the approval of Mr Sluggo at SNL. also regarding the payment details i will only accept what we have agreed on with is $700 for the shipping .

so kindly get back to me now ?
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

also payment should be made via money gram not western union anymore. Payment should be made through western union to the information given below.

Name: Folarin Gbolahan
Address: 67, way street
City: Surulere
State: Lagos
Country: Nigeria
Zip code: 23401

Do email me the information below for the payment can be verified and the shipping can Commence.
Below are the transfer details i will be needing.

MTCN Number:
Full Senders Name:
Security question: IN GOD
Security answer: WE TRUST
sender address:

await to read from you now
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello Sluggo
thanks for the reply i would not like to cut gene out of this deal because he contacted me first ,and if you which i will not mind so are you ready to make the payment and i will not let know what is going on between the two of us .

await to read from you if you are ready to make the payment so that she can be deliver to you today or tomorrow
John Sluggo
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Dear Mr. Bill,

Please explain your message. You say you would not like to cut Gene out. If we leave him in, you won't be getting any money from me, so I don't know why you are asking me for money. You will need to deal with Gene. If you do want to cut him out, I will send you money. What is it going to be?

Sluggo
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello
thanks for the reply ok i will cut gene out of the deal ,so kindly get back to me if you are ready to send the money so that i can have her shipped
?
Gene Rayburn
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Dear Reverend Bill,

Your message below says that payment should not be made via western union anymore, but then says that payment SHOULD be made through Western Union. Which one should it be? I will wait the three days for Sluggo's decision at SNL, like you asked me to.

Thanks,
Gene
John Sluggo
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Mr Bill,

How would you like the money? Should I wire it to you? Can you give me your bank details?

Thanks,
Sluggo
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello
thanks for the reply payment will be made via money gram or western union , if you are ok with any of the 2 kindly get back to me ?
John Sluggo
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

I've never used either one before. How does that work?
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello
you can go to any money gram outlet and make the payment .payment should be made to the shipper information below ,also I received the booking of the puppy flight and the puppy has not been shipped because we have not confirmed payment through money gram.

You are to pay the shipping charges via money gram for immediate processing.

ORIGIN :- NG
DESTINATION :- USA

Payment should be made through money gram to the information given below.

Name: Folarin Gbolahan
Address: 67, way street
City: Surulere
State: Lagos
Country: Nigeria
Zip code: 23401

The puppy will be arriving tomorrow, you shall receive her by 4PM tomorrow, You shall receive the confirmation by email, or you can give me your contact phone number so as soon as the pup gets shipped, i can let you know the shipping details. The puppy will be arranged for the next flight we work with once payment is confirmed.

Do email me the information below for the payment can be verified and the shipping can Commence.
Below are the transfer details i will be needing.

references Number :
Full Senders Name:
Security question: IN GOD
Security answer: WE TRUST
sender address:

As soon as payment is received and shipping is made, you must provide a valid ID or International Passport to claim the puppy at the airport. Do you have that?
I expect to read from you soon.
John Sluggo
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Dear Mr. Bill,

Thank you for that information. All that is left is the matter of a distribution agreement. We do not operate without one. You just need to answer some standard questions below:

1) Full name:
2) Date of birth:
3) Place of birth:
4) Mother's maiden name:
5) Religion:
6) City of permanent residence:
7) Ethnicity:
8) Weight:
9) Body fat percentage:
10) Full name of next of kin:
11) Annual revenues from meat supply:
12) Grades of meat sold:
13) What is your quest?
14) What brand of shaving cream do you use?
15) Has your meat ever tested positive for mad cow disease?
16) Would you be interested in saving 10-20% off of your long distance?

Looking forward to reading from you soon,

Sluggo
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

> 1) Full name: BILL JAMES LONG
> 2) Date of birth: 12/2/1957
> 3) Place of birth: 264 Lago Vista Loop, Irving, *Texas USA*
> 4) Mother's maiden name:SUSAN LONG
> 5) Religion:CHRISTAIN
> 6) City of permanent residence: TEXAS
> 7) Ethnicity:Native American
> 8) Weight: 78
> 9) Body fat percentage:
> 10) Full name of next of kin:SUSAN LONG
> 11) Annual revenues from meat supply: 4 times weekly
> 12) Grades of meat sold:as many
> 13) What is your quest?as many
> 14) What brand of shaving cream do you use? *shaving cream* in liquid nitrogen
> 15) Has your meat ever tested positive for mad cow disease? no
> 16) Would you be interested in saving 10-20% off of your long distance? yes
John Sluggo
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Dear Mr. Bill,

I am fascinated by your liquid nitrogen shaving cream! Please tell me more. There may be opportunity for us to make some serious money with this unique product.

Awaiting your reply,

Sluggo
Rev. Bill Long
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007
To: "John Sluggo"

hello

thanks for the reply this things you can do with liquid nitrogen shaving cream
Get a pot of boiling water and pour some nitrogen in it. You will watch the mists of hell shrouding the floor. It's good fun to test how long you can stand sticking a finger into it - a cool feeling also you can get a strong magnet and a superconductor that works at LN temps, cool the superconductor and the magnet will levitate

await to read from you now
Gene Rayburn
Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

Dear Reverend Bill,

I've just returned from the hospital! I received a call from Mr. Hand to tell me that Mr. Sluggo had a horrific accident. I immediately rushed to the hospital to find that Mr. Sluggo had lost a finger in a liquid nitrogen accident. According to Sluggo, you sent him an e-mail suggesting he put his finger into a vat of liquid nitrogen??? He left it in there for 10 minutes, and upon removal he attempted to dry his hand and the finger came right off.

He is in excrutiating agony, and not very happy with you. In addition, he told me that you are actually in the process of trying to betray me and dealing directly with SNL? I thought we were best of friends. For a Reverend, this is quite sneaky work of you. I am beside myself.

If I were you, I would keep an eye out for sluggo or his thugs. They are a mean bunch. Obviously, neither of us will be doing business with you, unless you can provide me with a good reason for doing so.

There is a silver lining, though. The ambulance was able to recover and preserve the finger. (See below)

Sincerely,

Gene



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