HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL



Welcome back Reverend Bob of the Church of the Blessed Beehive! Bzz bzz!

Another long (overlong possibly) exchange with poor refugee who's fortune is being held by some scallywag in Senegal.

I overplayed my hand and failed to get a photgraph out of her. Damn and blast!! She smelled a rat and possibly ran a check on the internet to see whether or not she could check out the Reverend Bob. Shame as I'd worked out such a nice plan for them to traipse round various Western Union offices in search of the money.

Photos attached. Herman Weiner is Dennis Franz (US film and TV star). Reverend Bob is Nicholas Parsons (ageing UK TV / Radio game show host, theatre etc) ...

Hug-a-bee is of course a pure work of fiction and a similarity to any person living or dead is purely coincidental.

Go with God and watch out for sticky fingers.

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas


Featuring:

Hope Nosa - scammer
Garry Young - Operational Director, Uyiedo Security and Finance Company - either Hope's alter ego or boss

Is "Garry" an Edo-speaker named Uyi? Joe Wein gives a more specific and interesting example:
http://www.joewein.de/sw/419representative.htm
referring to one Uyi Aruloye at the Vic Biz internet cafe in Benin City, Edo State Nigeria.
Visit Joe Wein's site to see the hate mail he gets.

Edo is a language of Nigeria, used by about a million people.
The UN High Commissioner for Human Rights page shows the Universal Declaration of Human Rights in Edo:
http://www.unhchr.ch/udhr/lang/edo.htm

And on the side of truth, justice and the Beehive way:
Reverend Bob - helpful cleric
Herman Weiner - CEO of Herman's Honies


HOPE NOSA

From: hope nosa <hope_nosa@yahoo.co.uk>
To:
Subject: hello
Date: Sat, 2 Apr 2005

Dear,
Top of the day to you and hope you are doing fine, stay cool if that is true. I don't want you to be taken aback by this email, but I just want to let you know that you can be of help to me with just a little gesture.

I don't need your money, substance or finance, all I need is just your moral support and to also stand as a front for me, but before then, we need to get acquainted first then we can now come down to a compromise.

I would be very glad if you'd show interest in this matter, then I will tell you about every thing what I'm talking about, maybe it will also be beneficial to you. So if you are interested, just indicate by responding to this email and then I will follow up.

Thanks for reading my email and I wait to hear from you auspiciously



Reverend Bob

02-Apr-05

Dear Miss Hope,

I was surprised to receive you e-mail and I hope that I have addressed you correctly.

As person of faith I would be happy to place my faith in you. As you will see from my signature I am the Primary Prolapsed Archbishop of the Church of the Blessed Beehive here in Little Pecker, Texas. We are a recently founded church that is attracting a small but generous congregation.

We believe that the glorious bee is a living symbol and live our lives simply but in the belief that God helps those who help themselves.

Perhaps you would like us to pray for you in your hour of need? By the way although we do not actively solicit donations you are welcome to support our activities. Please also note that any financial support will qualify for USAID Dollar Matching Fiscal Support as detailed in paragraph 247(3)(d)(ii) of your IRS return and sanctioned as a 501(c)(3) tax deductible entity.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas


Sponsored by Herman's Honies
They're finger lickin' good



Hope Nosa

Monday, April 4, 2005

Hi,

I know and agree that there are so many things happening today, but I also believe the in the midst of mediocre you can still find a genius, so I will be glad if you don't take my story with a pitch of salt or like every other cock and bull story, but if you do, then maybe it's my fate and I will still thank you for taking the time to read my mail.

As a matter of fact, I am Evangelist Hope Anna Nosa , the eldest daughter of late Dr. Moussa Lokoh Nosa . I am a citizen of Sierra-Leone. My late father was the managing director of Aluminium Company and the chairman of the Diamond Cooperation of Sierra-Leone, but unfortunately he died in the year 2002 after a protracted illness. Due to poor management of the company, and coupled with the war that just ended in my country and for the fact that I am so dedicated to church activities, I realized that I am too young to manage a large company of that type and most of the director have already began to divert the net profit being generated from the company.

I therefore arrange with my father's lawyer and sold the entire company to Mr. Alan Foster from Poland at the price of US $5, 600, 000, (Five Million Six Hundred Thousand Dollars). Due to constant pressure from some of my relatives and also fear of likely attack on my family to hijack the fund, I arrange with my mother to transfer the fund to one of the security and finance company in Senegal together with the money left in my father's account before he died, where my mother and two other sisters are currently staying. After my late father's family discovered what I did, they got annoyed and decided to deal with me, but however, I managed to escape to Spain with the help of a red-cross man through Morocco. I am into pastoral activities here in Malaga and most of my time is been dedicated to church activities. At the moment, we want to transfer the fund to overseas account for investment because there is no good investment atmosphere Senegal and even Africa as a whole especially when we don't know people. I therefore need your assistance to enable me transfer the whole fund of $9,800,000 (Nine Million, eight hundred thousand including the money left in his account ) into your account if possible so that we can relocate to plan for the investment of the fund through your personal assistance.

I need your assistance in investing the fund because I have little experience of investment / management of the fund. It is also my plan that after the successful transfer of the fund into your account, I will first relocate my mother and other 2 sisters to stay with you, while I will complete my theological school that I am about to start. What I need from you is honest and sincerity because this fund is my life and the life of my family. If can assist us in this transaction, I and my family will forever grateful and indebted to you, I won't promise you anything, but we shall express our gratitude to you in cash or kind. While the money remains in your account for (for sometime) to enable me complete my school and join my family to plan for the investments. Please, be assured that this transaction is 100% risk free.
I await your soonest response.

Regards and God bless.

Hope Anna Nosa



Reverend Bob

4-Apr-05

Subject : Praise the workers for they bring forth nectar

Dear Miss Hope,

I was somewhat surprised but nonetheless gratified to receive your e-mail . I was so sorry to to read that your father died but at least he provided for you. You mention other family members, and your desire to get them relocated, does this mean that you are all alone my child?

Here at the hive we seek to create a family atmosphere and I can only imagine what life must be like for you. You mention that you were now living in Malaga, Spain and to be honest I had no idea where that was. Are you living in a refugee camp? Do you have access to food and clean water? To have undergone such a harrowing journey and then to devote your time to pastoral activities is simply unbelievable.

I have considerable experience with young girls and take great pleasure in being able to instruct them in many of life's experiences. You do make mention that you are young, may I enquire as to your age?

As to your investment requirements I should point out that I am not an investment manager but a man of faith. You mention that your fathers business was sold for $5.6M in 2002 and now the fund is worth $9.8M, that seems a pretty good increase in a short space of time. Perhaps I should be asking you for advice? As I mentioned before our church is not considered wealthy and at present we have only some $400,000 in our banking accounts. We had planned later this year to start raising funds for our anniversary Baptismal Font and Spa and if you'd like to contribute then you would be most welcome.

Alternatively our sponsor, Herman's Honies, is looking for suitable young ladies for a fundraising brochure and our Grand Gala Dinner at the Bunny Ranch in Waco come Fall, perhaps we could persuade you to fly over and take part?

You also mention that you could make payment for my services in cash or in kind. What exactly do you mean by 'in kind', could you perhaps be more explicit? If we can agree on something suitable then I'm sure that we can give each other a helping hand.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas


Sponsored by Herman's Honies
They're finger lickin' good



Hope Nosa

Tuesday, April 5, 2005

Hi Rev Bob,

Thank you very much for your quick response, and your intention to help me, I also thank you for taking the time to care about my well being and for also really being touched by my predicament.

My mother and the rest of my sisters are in Dakar and I am here in Spain all alone, I am in a kind of refugee camp, it is a house own by one christian and he gave it out to the UN to house people like us, so we are about 23 girls in this house and our clothes and food is given by the UN. I beleive that what my family and I went through is a test of faith for us, but it only pains me that my father had to die, but then, we still thank God for keeping the rest of us alive. I am 22 and will be 23 this year, I know nothing about investment and business, and I do not trust any body outside the convenant, but for the fact that you are a man of God, that's enough reason for me to trust you, because you can't use the name of the lord in vain. After I sold my father's company, it is not that i increased it by doing business with it, we sold every other thing we had, and that was how it amounted to that amount. All I want you to do is to help me receive the fund in your account and we promise to pay back, when i say in kind, it means that I could come over to your church after my bible scholl to be a part of your ministry with all my heart and susbstance. So it will also be good if the fund can be transfered to your already existing account whethear church or personal account, both are good.

Lest I forget, How are you and your family? and the church? I hope you are doing great, thank God if that is true. I once again appreciate your effort in helping us in this transaction, all we want is for you to stand as my front in receiving this fund. So I would like you to contact the security and finance Company and tell them that you want to transfer the fund into your account in your country. And secondly, the person to contact is the operational Director of the SECURITY AND FINANCE COMPANY, I called them today and told them that my foreign partner would be transferring my fund very soon and that they should comply with you as long as the transfer lasts. So I would like to give you their contact now in order for you to be able to contact them.

Name : UYIEDO SECURITY & FINANCE COMPANY
Address: 147 AV. CHEIK ANTA DIOP DAKAR SENEGAL
Tel : + 221 596 54 94
Fax : + 221 892 49 56
Email : uyi_secom@sunumail.sn , uyi_secom@yahoo.fr
Contact: Mr.Garry (Operational Director)

And please don't forget to tell them that you are have settle everything with me, although they might contact me to be sure if you are really my partner, my mother sends her greetings to you and pray for our success. I hope to hear from you later, I will send any document they may require from you to you so that there won't be any impedement.

Have a nice day
Hope



Reverend Bob

8-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young,

I have been in contact with Ms Hope Nosa this young lady who is in need of assistance. I have agreed to help if at all possible.

I hope you don't mind me asking, but are you acquainted with Ms Nosa? It does seem that she is very young and very inexperienced in such matters and I am concerned that she will be taken advantage of.

It is up to men of substance such as you and me to do all that we can to protect the vulnerable.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

8-Apr-05

My dear Hope,

I intend to base my sermon this Sunday on the above and use you as an example of how a poor innocent can be truly inspirational.

I was deeply moved by your promise that when you completed your training you would be offer your services to the Church of the Blessed Beehive and devote your life to our community.

This Sunday marks a very special day in the calendar of the Church in that it is the Feast of St Ambrose, our patron saint. We will be lifting our voices together in praise of the Holy Queen and Sister Hoolihan will be performing her honey dance where she annoints the Secret Chamber with the amber nectar. Sister Hoolihan was like you, a refugee from a former life. 'Hot Lips' as she was known was rescued from the Abilene Rabbit Ranch where she has spent three long years providing personal services to dusty cowpokes.

I wonder whether or not you would be prepared to consider starting the preparatory work to join our church? It is no more than reading a document and completing a questionnaire. I do hope that you will be able to say 'Yes. Buzz Buzz!"

I have written today to Mr Young. I do hope that he is a trustworthy gentleman, do you know him at all? One can never be too careful these days when there are so many charlatans and mountebanks wherever one looks.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

From : Uyiedo Security Company <uyi_secom@yahoo.fr>
Friday, April 8, 2005

Attn: Reverend Bob

Dear Sir,

We got your email and the content was very well understood by me.

You mentioned in your email that you are Hope Nosa's partner and that you want to transfer her fund which is under our custody to your account is that what you said you want?

Despite the fact that you introduced yourself as the foreign partner of Hope Nosa, we are not allowed to give out information or transact with strangers even for the fact that you introduced yourself as her foreign partner, this is a security and finance company and our duty here is to protect the properties/interests of our clients and we have thousands of clients all over the world that we attend to daily and we have experienced diver things, so to help you and to help us also, you are requested to send the following documents to us, by fax or email attachment.

1. A copy of the Certificate of Ownership

2. A letter of Nomination from your Partner(Hope Nosa) prepared by a lawyer here

And once we would be sure that you are known to the depositor and authurised to deal with us. We are looking forward to hearing from you and seeing the requested documents. We highly regret any inconvenience which this may cause you.

Sincerely yours,

Mr.Garry Young.
Operational Director
Uyiedo Security and Finance Company



Reverend Bob

9-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young,

Thank you for your prompt response which arrived just as I was greasing the nipples for one of the Sisters. Hair shirts are uncomfortable at the best of times.

I am more than a little surprised that you are unable to help at this time and I have therefore contacted Ms Nosa for further instructions.

Do you like honey? We are having a open baptism session at the end of this month and we would be happy to include you in our numbers if you wish.

Go with God buzz buzz

. Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Reverend Bob

9-Apr-05

Dearest Hope

I'm afraid that we may have a problem.

Your banker has written back to say that he can't help and he can't be certain who I am. I thought you had been in touch with him? Please tell me what is going on.

I can understand that the bank are concerned about security and perhaps we should agree on some code words or phrases?

Brother Sergei, who was former member of the Spetsnaz until he was discharged following an unfortunate misunderstanding with two sheep, says that security is vital and has suggested that we include special phrases in each message to make sure we are all OK.

From now on I will include 'The fly high when spurlocks are shalloppy'.

Please let me know what your phrase or codeword is to be.

Go with God buzz buzz

. Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

Saturday, April 9, 2005
Attn: Reverend Bod

Sir,

Thanks for your email which was received and very well understood by me. But I wonder what would make you to tell me what I think is not my business, so I would advise you to keep personal issues to yourself next time and let's concentrate on the issue that concerns us.

I didn't tell you that we are not going to help, I only asked you to send us some documentations (1.A copy of the Certificate of Ownership 2. A letter of Nomination from your Partner(Hope Nosa) prepared by a lawyer here) to assure me of your connaissance and partnership to Ms Hope Nosa.

And once we are able to get those documents fromn you, we would be sure that you are known to the depositor and authurised to deal with us. We are looking forward to hearing from you and seeing the requested documents. We highly regret any inconvenience which this may cause you.

Sincerely yours,
Mr.Garry Young.
Operational Director
Uyiedo Security and Finance Company



Reverend Bob

10-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young,

I apologise if I have caused you offence perhaps you are not used to our ways. It is normal to exchange pleasantries with one's business partners and I am sorry that you have perhaps misunderstood my previous letter. I am aware that not everyone outside of the great State of Texas understand English that well and for some it is a struggle.

Let me start again.

1. Ms Nosa told me nothing about your requirement for documentation
2. I have asked Ms Nosa for instructions as to my next step
3. Ms Nosa has not responded to my letter and until she does I am unable to take further action

I hope that the above is now understood. As before I am eager to help this young lady in any way possible and am looking forward to welcoming her into the arms of the Church of the Blessed Beehive.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

10-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young,

You appear have sent me this e-mail twice. There is no need to duplicity, I understood the first e-mail perfectly well.

I have responded to the points raised and will communicate with you further once I have received instructions from Ms Nosa.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Reverend Bob

10-Apr-05

Dearest Hope,

I have had a somewhat strange e-mail from your banker Mr Young. Is he alright? He doesn't seem to understand English very well and I am concerned that he may not be right person to look after your money. Do you know him at all? I think he may be either taking drugs or has a drink problem.

The sooner we can transfer the funds from his company the better because at this time of year the grunions fly high when spurlocks are shalloppy. I'm sure you know what I mean.

Have you considered my offer for you to appear in our fundraising brochure? You'd have a chance of winning the Texas May Queen first prize which is worth $25,000. Last year's winner caused huge controversy when it turned out she used to be an All American Tight End and played three seasons for the Mobil Marshmallows. She still is a tight end if you get my meaning but I'm not sure that she'll be joining the boys in the bath after the Super Bowl any more.

I do hope you'll be able to start the admission process for our church, it would be wonderful to initiate you personally into the raptures of the Blessed Beehive

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

Monday, April 11, 2005
Subject : Why we need documents, sir

Attn: Reverend Bob

Dear Sir,

I got your email and I want to let you know that I was not offended in any way, and I understand the English language very well, with due respect sir, I don't strungle to understand english.

Now to answer your questions, Nosa should know that this is a security company and we are only trying to protect her property and fund, it is true that she told us that you are her foreign partner, but it is verbal and not documented, and if something goes wrong tomorrow we'd have no evidence to show that you were officially introduced as her foreign partner and so she can deny you,sue us and win. The documents we asked you is to help her and she has them, so it is not a big task unless you are not related to her

We are here to serve you sir, so we can wait until you hear from her in order to carry out the next step, but if you don't get those documents, no transaction of whatsoever sir. We highly regret any inconvenience which this may cause you sir.

Regards,
Garry Young



Hope Nosa

Monday, April 11, 2005
Hi REv,
What did Mr. Garry Young say? did he say he's not going to transfer the fund? what is his problem? what did he say he wants? What is a 'strungle'?
Nosa



Reverend Bob

13-Apr-05
Dear Mr Young,
Thank you for your prompt response and I think I now understand what your doing. I had not appreciated the security requirements that a professional organisation needs to have in place to protect its customers from those that would seek to create mischief.
I have also had an e-mail from Ms Hope to confirm that as far as she is concerned everything is OK.
I've had some problems with my computer here at the Hive and have lost your previous messages. Can you please remind me about what needs to be done next. I seem to recall that I had to get a lawyer to prepare some papers for you.....is that right?
That won't be a problem of course because one my congregation is Barney McGrew, a partner in the firm of Cuthbert, Dibble and Grubb. I'm sure I could approach and see if he can help. He'll be at the service this Sunday and I can ask him then.
Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

13-Apr-05
Dearest Hope,
I have received an e-mail from someone who claims to be you. I can't be certain but I do know that there was no inclusion of the secret security phrase and as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy you just can't be too careful.
As soon as I know it's really you then I can respond and we can get going. Next week we start harvesting the cotton lint from our bees and we're all going to extremely busy.
Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Dear Sir,

We got your email and we clearly understood the content. As a matter of fact, we are not trying to complicate issues for you, we are only trying to protect your interest and property.

We asked you for some documents whic we know is under the custody of Miss Hope Nosa, I asked you to send us a copy of the Certificate of ownership, which was given to her on the day she deposited her fund with us, and we also asked you to send us a Letter of nomination, prepared by Hope Nosa's Lawyer here in Dakar, to show that you have been officially nominated by Miss Hope Nosa to receive the fund in your account.

So, I would advice you get in touch with Miss Hope Nosa for these documents as soon as possible. Send them to us as soon as you get them and we shall gladly effect the transfer into your account without any hinderance.

We look forward to receiving the documents from you.

Regards,
Garry Young,



Reverend Bob

16-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young,

I have taken your advice and written today to Miss Hope asking that she send me the necessary documents. Of course I understand that you have systems and procedures in place and I respect that.

As soon as I have the documents I will contact you further.

In the meantime, and I hope you do not mind me asking, are you a man of religion? My Church is always looking for new members of the congregation and I am sure you would be a strong candidate if you wished to embrace the faith.

Our Church is relatively new and we have been persecuted heavily by the authorities here in the USA due to the fact that some of our beliefs are claimed to infringe tax and consumer law but that is because the judiciary are not true believers and they will be smitten by the Blessed Queen for their lack of faith.

Meanwhile my son, Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

15-Apr-05

Dearest Hope,

I'm afraid that I need your help on this matter. Mr Young has asked me to supply him with the Certficate of Ownership and a letter of nomination. I have neither document and I assume that you can send them to me so that we can get this matter resolved as soon as possible.

Our lint harvesting starts next week and we're all going to be working from dawn to dusk with the bees. It is both arduous and dangerous work and we need to keep our wits about us, last year we lost one of our congregation, Gervaise Brook-Gibbon, when he fell into a vat and was drowned before anyone could help.

In anticipation of you embracing our faith I am attaching a file with one of our lapel badges, you might like to cut it out and stick it somewhere appropriate.

I look forward to hearing from you as long as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Hi Rev,

Thank you for your email, I have one of the documents they asked you, I have the Certificate of Ownership, it was among the documents my father gave to me before he died, it is with my mother in Dakar, but I don't have the other one, I have got in touch with a lawyer in Dakar today after I read your mail and I ask him to prepare the letter of Nomination, he asked for some money, but I have told my mother to pay him today so that he can get the paper done, so please send me your fax number, so that I can send the documents to you by fax through my mother or one of my sisters in Dakar, or if you don't have a fax, then we can send it by attachment, but I think fax is better.

I hope to hear from you now, please send your fax number so that you can get it later today and send it to them by monday morning.

Hope Nosa



Reverend Bob

17 Apr-05

Dearest Hope,

I trust that you won't mind me taking issue with you on a couple of points.

I am not happy to open your e-mails and see 'Hi Rev'. It makes me sound like a motorbike in fourth gear. I should be addressed as either 'Reverend Bob' or 'Bob'. I am quite happy to be referred to as the latter as I feel that in a few short weeks we have been corresponding we can treat each other as friends.

Secondly, security. Mr Gary Young has emphasized how important this is and I have asked you to make use of the security phrase 'the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy' in your e-mails so that I know it is indeed you. I have spoken to Brother Sergei again and he was insistent that if you don't use the phrase then I should not respond. I hope Hope that you understand the requirements.

Finally you have not responded to my questions regarding joining our church and taking part in the Grand Gala Dinner at the Bunny Ranch. I appreciate you must be very busy with your studies but you must give me your answer?

With regard to the documentation we no longer have a fax machine. (It got broke back in January when our office was trashed by Old Bertie, our 300 pound boar, who broke loose and ran amok in the 'Stick the tail on the Pig' fundraiser after Big Bubba Wilkins misunderstood and stuck the tail in the pig. Even now the mere thought makes my eyes water.) Anyhow we never got round to buying a new one.

I know that the Western Union office in our local town has a fax and I suppose I could ask whether they'd be happy to take a fax for me. Perhaps it might be as easy to send the document as an attachment. I'll let you chose.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Monday, April 18, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

I kindly apologise for calling you "Rev" and I also apologise if it got you upset, please try and find a way to forgive me. I will yeild to your advice.

I will use the security code you want, I will gladly like to participate in the Grand Gala, if the date and time matches my program here in my bible school, but as for joining the church, that I have already agreed to do.

Here is the Certificate of ownership, please do download it and send it back to them, my sister will go to their office tomorrow morning to give them the other document (Letter of Nomination) personally since they said it has to come from me by a lawyer in Dakar, so my sister is doing that for me, the lawyer said that he hasn't finish with it but he will finish it this evening, so my sister will get it this evening and send it to them tomorrow morning, so here's the other one, try and send it to them as soon as possible.

Hope Nosa.

Reverend Bob

21-Apr-05

Dear Hope,

I am writing to confirm that I have just forwarded the Certificate of Ownership to Mr Young as requested. Please do include the security phrase in all your e-mails.

Of course you haven't upset me and I and my fellow members of the the Church of the Blessed Beehive are delighted that you will be joining our congregation. I have asked our Membership Secretary, Sister Morticia, to prepare the membership papers and they will be sent on to you as soon as possible.

With regard to our Grand Gala I completely understand that your bible studies must come first. If you can join us then we would be delighted, if you cannot then all we can ask for is a sign of your support and that will be more than enough.

In previous years we have had our foreign friends send us their photos with a message of support and then we've elected the Gala Queen from the photo parade. Top prize last year was $5,000 and a week's free treatments at the Mother of Mercy Colonic Irrigation Spa in Small Winkle, New Mexico. It was an exciting competition despite there being only three entrants and was won by Gerhard Katzenjammer a 350lb bar owner from Bad Neuecock in Germany. The other contestants were a car salesman from Tulsa who had undergone major and unsuccessful facial reconstruction after an aggrieved customer ran him down and a bearded cross dresser from New Orleans. I was amazed and had a lady entered then she would have won with ease.

This year I'm afraid it's just the cash. The FBI's raid on the Mother of Mercy offices resulted in their immediate closure and they're all now facing charges which are too dreadful to discuss even on an e-mail especially as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shallopy. Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

I just called the security company and they told me that they have not received any email from you, please can you find out if this is true and resend?

as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shallopy.

Hope

Reverend Bob

23-Apr-05

Dearest Hope

I really don't know what happened to the file that I sent Mr Young. Do you think there my be a breach of security? One can never be too careful these days.

I have sent the file again and will ask Mr Young to confirm that he has received it. Sometimes in these large companies they do lose letters and such like so please don't worry I'm sure we will get this sorted out for you.

If we don't then we can always get Brother Anthony to visit Mr Young. Before he discovered the Church of the Blessed Beehive he was perhaps better known as Tony 'Icepick' Fusilli who worked for the Lumache family in New York. Never forget that the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

23-Apr-05

Dear Mr Young

I am sending you the required Certificate of Ownership for the box that you are holding for Ms Hope Nosa.

This is the second time that I have sent the file and I would be grateful if you would please confirm safe receipt.

Please remember that the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy. Do be careful that you're not standing underneath when they fly overhead. A hard hat and washable outer garments is advisable.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Sunday, April 24, 2005
Subject : Re: Attached file

Hi Reverend Bob,

I got your email and i pray he receives it this time, I will try and call him now (if it's not too late) to see if he has gotten it.

I will get back to you later "as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shallopy"

Hope


At long last the request for some money. And there I was beginning to think that perhaps this was a real genuine hardship case - NOT!


Garry Young

Monday, April 25, 2005

Attn: Reverend Bob,

Dear Sir,

We got your email and the attached documents that we requested from you(1.CERTIFICATE OF OWNERSHIP with Security Code: PMK/523/XEC/S&D/2003. 2.LETTER OF NOMINATION which was brought in by one Ms. Juliet Nosa who happens to be related to Ms. Hope Nosa this morning).

Now we would be able to transact with you and you are now therefore officially recognised as a partner or associate to Ms. Hope Nosa,according to the agreement we entered with her in the LETTER OF AUTHORISATION.

Now that you have submitted the required documents, we stop the accumulation of demurrage today(24th April 2005)if only the fund is intended to be transferred before one week, but if the transfer proccess ecceeds one week, then the demurrage takes effect again until proper arrangement for transfer is concluded. But due to the fact that you are not the original depositor of the fund, and although you have been presented and nominated by Ms. Anna Lokoh's personal attorney (Barr. Lamine Diouf)here in Dakar(SENEGAL) as her foreign partner, we are still very sorry to inform you that we can not transfer the fund into your account with reference to the security company's constitution Degree ní2 Section 8(2)Article 56, Paragraph 12-14 of the national finance ministry 1996.

So we would advise you make a change of ownership, if your partner(Ms. Hope Nosa would agree)this would automatically change the names on the files into your names and make you the secondary owner and it is better for both of you (becasue your name did not appear as the beneficiary in the CERTIFICATE OF OWNERSHIP)so that we can then directly transfer the fund into your account without any delay and hinderance, but before a change of ownership is made , both parties (Ms. Hope Nosa and Mr/Reverend Bob) has to come into agreement,and once you have agreed then you can now send the following to us for us to carry on with the change of ownership by the company's attorney or an attorney of your choice here in Dakar. We therefore reqiure the following from you;

1.YOUR FULL DATAS/PARTICULARS(NAME, DATE OF BIRTH)
2.TWO PASSPORT PHOTOGRAHPS(FRONT AND SIDE VIEW)
3.ONE THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED Euro (€2.500 Eur)
4.THE PHOTOCOPY OF THE PICTURE PAGE OF YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVING LICENCE

Please send these as soon as possible so that we could start the change of ownership as soon as possible.

All payment should be made to our accountant (Mr. Joseph Nicolas Osas)through bank wire transfer or through western union money transfer or money gram transfer. We are looking forward to hearing from you soonest.

Sincerely yours,
Mr.GARRY YOUNG
OPERATIONAL DIRECTOR
UYIEDO SECURITY AND FINANCE COMPANY



Reverend Bob

3-May-05

Dear Mr Young,

Thank you for your e-mail and please accept my apologies for the delay in responding. I am delighted that we are at last making some real progress. As you quite correctly point out I will need to obtain the consent of Miss Hope to the change of ownership and will write to her today to advise her of the requirement.

I am concerned about these 'demurrage' charges that you say have been stopped for a week. What exactly is 'demurrage'? It is not a word that I have come across in the my work. Does Miss Hope know about this.

As soon as I hear from Miss Hope I will write you further./

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

3-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I have only just had the time to open my e-mails from the last week - the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I have been so busy inducting some new young novices into the secret ways of the Church of the Blessed Beehive that I am quite worn out and not feeling myself. Fortunately I now have these young novices to do that for me and Sister Innocence is proving to be remarakably adept.

Mr Young has written me an extremely long and complicated letter and to be honest I'm not entirely sure I understand all of it. He needs to have you consent to a change in the ownership or something like that. Could you perhaps call him and see what you can do?

I'm going to be working on our brochure and booklet for the Gala Fundraising Dinner and am confident that it will be the best ever. We have several stars from the Las Vegas film industry donating some fascinating photos to support our Auction of Promises and some of the Brothers are getting very excited.

Please do let me know what should be happening next and how you get on with Mr Young.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

Tuesday, May 3, 2005

Dear Sir,
Your email was received and understood. We understand that you have to agree with your partner before any change could be done to or in the original deposit papers.

Demurrage is not different from it's meaning, as long as the property/item is in our costudy, the depositor has to pay us for being the costudian and if anything happens to the property/item, we shall be liable to pay, the demurrage fee is US$50 per day, and she paid for a period of time, and when her demurrage expires and she fails to clear and retreive her property/item from us, then she will pay for the amount of days depassed before she gets back her property/item and I am quite sure that she is aware of it.

Regards,

Mr.GARRY YOUNG


Hope Nosa

Wednesday, May 4, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy, I tried to call Mr. Young, but he was not on seat, so I left a message for him, can you please forward his mail to me?

Hope

Reverend Bob

4-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I'm sorry that you have not been able to contact Mr Young by telephone as I am sure a quick conversation would resolve all of this. It is at times like this that I do regret that the Church of the Blessed Beehive is a silent order!! The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I assume that Juliet Nosa is indeed your sister, Mr Young seems to be saying that she was only related to you for the morning. Seems a very strange thing to say, I trust Mr Young is not unwell. You mention that he was not on his seat and perhaps he has had some digestive problems which required him to visit the smallest room in the house? Should I ask?

I've getting more and more involved with our Grand Gala Dinner and the fundraising events that are scheduled for late this year so you must excuse me if my responses to your e-mails are sometimes slow. We've invited a very prominent person to be the Guest Speaker and understand he has accepted, no names no pack drill but if I was to say 'Dubya' you may be able to work it out for yourself.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

6-May-05

Dear Mr Young,

I have received an e-mail from Miss Hope who said that she had tried to contact you by telephone but unfortunately you were not on your seat.

I do hope that you are not unwell. I find that when I'm not on my seat it's usually due to having eaten shellfish and a few hours in the smallest room in the house speaking to God on the great white telephone usually resolves the problem.

Can I suggest a remedy that my Grandpappy used as a cure all for everything from the common cold to cancer by way of chillblains, genital warts and women's problems (if you get my drift!).

Take one part gentian violet, one part shark oil, two parts Scott's Emulsion. Shake until emulsified. Add half a cup of lemon juice, quarter cup of vinegar, quarter cup of sugar and two raw eggs. Mix well and drink down in one. Believe me you'll feel the change immediately.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Saturday, May 7, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

I have called and given him my consent, so please go ahead and do the change of ownership.

Hope

Garry Young

From : Uyi-Edo Security & Finance Company <info@uyi-edo-security.com>

Saturday, May 7, 2005

Please sir,
if you have nothing better to say, please just keep your dirty advice to yourself, who are you and which part of the bush did you come from?

You are too ill mannered and unrespectful, I think that I have to stop all communications with you and please don't contact me again.

Mr. Garry Young.



Reverend Bob

7-May-05
Subject : Mr Gary Young - fearful for his health

Dearest Hope,

I've just received the most remarkable e-mail from Mr Young. You wrote in your last e-mail that he was 'not on his seat' - in my part of the world that means someone is ill. I had therefore written him with details of a wonderful cure that my Grandpappy used on all of us kids when we were small. No matter what ailed us we were soon cured.

Mr Young seems to feel that I have insulted him although I fail to see how offering him some assistance can be seen in such a way.

I am greatly concerned that someone who appears to be mentally unbalanced is not suited to be managing a security company with responsibility for looking after the property and valuables of people such as yourself. He asks me what kind of bush I come from - not something that a sane person would ask.

When you spoke to him did he sound OK? Should I write back to him or not? I fear that he will no longer respond to my messages. I do hope I haven't ruined everything for you.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Hope Nosa

Monday, May 9, 2005

Reverend Bob,

Good day to you, if I should start by saying that I really don't know what is going on, but all I know if that Mr Young is a very nice person, and he is very ok, but I wonder what always makes you have frictions, I will try to find out, ok? I will write to him to find out what is wrong, he might misunderstood your email.

Don't be paniced about it, he hs no right to stop my transaction, as long as we are all clear and we have no criminal intentions, it is my money and I have the right to choose whoever I want to transfer the money to, so don't worry too much about it, but one thing is that Mr. Young is very sensetive, I didn't tell you he was sick, I only told you that he was not on seat, it means that he was not in his office when I called, so you should have enquired further before you sent him a medical advice mail, it is enough to get someone upset. But I can have the situation under control especially The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Hope



Reverend Bob

09-May-2005

Dearest Hope,

Thank you for your concern and reassuring words. I am delighted to hear that Mr Young is in a good state of health and not suffering from any illness or delusions although it is a concern that he is in your own words 'sensitive'. He does seem to have a bit of a temper on him and his attitude to customers does require some moderation. I am used to be given respect and his language at times has shocked me.

As you suggested it must all be down to a misunderstanding. I'm glad that you have now made it clear that not being on his seat simply meant he was not at his desk. Please remember when you come to Texas that if you say that about someone it does mean they're spending a lot of time in the smallest room in the house especially as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I will write Mr Young and just confirm that he is prepared to continue with this transaction, he had implied that he would not communicate with me further. As we say in Texas, there's many a fletch that churns in the crummock but you're a smart young woman and I'm sure you know that anyway.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

9-May-2005

Dear Mr Young,

Miss Hope has written to me and explained all the circumstances and I am so glad that you are in hale and hearty health and that the confusion existed simply because of my misunderstanding what I was told by Miss Hope. She is such a wonderful young woman but at times her written English leaves some room for improvement.

I hope that you will now be prepared to continue with this transaction, after all Miss Hope and I are your customers and she assures me that are a very nice man and represent a really professional organisation.

In anticipation of your continued valued cooperation I am attaching my photograph as requested. It was taken as a publicity shot when I appeared on the Jay Leno show which I'm sure you will have heard of. It doesn't show me at my best but if you'd like an autographed copy please do let me know.

If you're in agreement that we continue with the transaction please let me know and I will forward the other details as needed.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas





Garry Young

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Attn: Reverend Bob,

Dear Sir,
I want to use this medium to acknowledge the receipt of your email. I have heard all your explainations and I want to inform you that your explaination has been whole-heartedly accepted.

I have nothing personal with you, but sometimes we get misunderstood maybe due to language barrier, but that notwithstanding, I am here to serve you and every other client of ours, but when personal matters comes in I do all I can to avoid it because this is a company's email and personal issues are not to be discussed here. I am not a bad person neither do I have any interest in your funds, but I think that I am trying to do what I am supposed to do as an operational director. But I hope that all is well now and that you have understood my plight.

The photo you sent could be accepted by me, just because of the misunderstanding we have had recently, so I wouldn't want to stress you any further, but you still have to provide the remaining requirement as soon as possible.

1.YOUR FULL DATAS/PARTICULARS (NAME, DATE OF BIRTH)
2.TWO THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED Euro (€2.500 Eur)
3.THE PHOTOCOPY OF THE PICTURE PAGE OF YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR DRIVING LICENCE

We shall procceed with the transfer upon the receipt of the requirement. Have a wonderful day and sorry for the misunderstanding so far.

Regards,
Mr. Garry Young

Hope Nosa

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

Sorry for the late response, it is due to my busy scheldule especially as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I have spoken with my Garry and he has accepted my apology, have you sent him any mail? any news from him?

Hope

Reverend Bob

15-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I trust that this message finds you well. I know that the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy and that can lead to hectic times so there is no need to apologise for your busy schedule.

I too have been extremely busy this last week or so. You'll remember that I hinted that we were having a VIP to give the keynote speech. Well ever since we've been pestered, tormented and bothered by his security people - not to mention the press and media. I had no idea that the upheaval in our lives would be so traumatic. The first problem is that I've been told that the Waco Bunny Ranch has some security weaknesses and can we move the Gala Dinner to somewhere else. At this late stage you'll appreciate it's a tad difficult to find another classy joint but one of neighbors, Syrus Mooseblaster, is going to see whether his his brother-in -law can accommodate us at the Tumbleweed Trailer Park just outside Beaver Munch. My next job is to get the photos together for our fundraising brochure. Now that we've got 'you know who' as the guest speaker I'm confident that we can raise well over $500,000 and the first prize is now going to be $50,000.

By the way I had a very nice message from Mr Young, it seems that he has calmed down and is prepared to work with us again. I'll write him later today and send him what information I have.

Must dash now and administer to the needs of my flock. Artificial insemination does take it out of one.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

15-May-05

Dear Garry,

I do hope that you don't mind if I call you by your first name now that we seem to have ironed out those little difficulties. As you say quite rightly suggest it was all a misunderstanding and I the thought that you were a bad person had never entered my mind.

Now you wanted some further details to enable the business to be completed and I hope that the following will be of assistance.

Name: Reverend Bob. When I created the Church of the Blessed Beehive and became the Primary Prolapsed Archbishop I cast aside my previous name and gender to become 'Reverend Bob'. Details and confirmation can be obtained from the Transgender Registration Unit in the state capital Austin.

Date of birth 10-10-43

Address Church of the Blessed Beehive, Little Pecker, Texas

Passport etc I haven't been out of the country for over 30 years and to be honest I have no idea where my passport is. As for a driving licence I haven't had one since the incident in Amarillo back in '97 when I was arrested by the State Troopers. Of course these days I'm a reformed character and wouldn't dream of doing what I did to those two poor boys with those zucchini and a jar of chili mayonnaise.

I might have my old Military ID card somewhere if you think that may help and of course I'll keep looking for my passport.

The only thing I was a little surprised at was your request for a fee of 2,500 euros. What exactly are 'euros'? Can't say I've ever heard of them before now. Do they equal any kind of proper money like US dollars?

Can you also please explain why your fee has increased from 1,500 euros (your e-mail of 25th April) to 2,500 euros in your last e-mail. All this financial stuff just confuses me and I have to admit I didn't really understand your previous explanation about demurrage. I apologise in advance but when you get to my age all this high finance becomes very tiresome.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Garry Young

Monday, May 16, 2005

Attn: Reverend Bob,

Dear Sir,
Thanks for your email and I am very glad that our personal differences have been settled, now let's get don to business.

I got your email and the contents was very well understood. Now I would like to send you our response.

We don't care about your change of name, if you can justify the act with documents of Change of Name, but if you do't have such documents, then your name has not been changed officially to us, then you must have to use the names that appear on your ID.Unless you have any ID with your new name, we have been transacting with Reverend Bob, and we would like to see any ID of the above name, for personal reasons, I can accept any ID from you because of our new relationship.

I can also do without your passport if you can provide me an ID card bearing your name. But I guess your military ID will do the work.

About the fee (€2500), it was never €1500, it was €2500, I have gone back to my mail of 25th April and I discovered that it was €2500 I wrote (in figures), but one thousand five hundred (in words)which was a typographical error, So the correct amount is €2500.

Regards,
Garry Young



Hope Nosa

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

How are you? I hope you are fine, I have not heard from you, why are you silent? I hate not hearing from you especially when the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Hope



Reverend Bob

20-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I can't believe how the time is flying at the moment. I think some of Sister Dimitri's special mushroom flan is having a serious effect on my time management. I've also noticed that the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy. They're pink and spotty. Nice.

I simply haven't had a moment to myself lately and to be honest we had a bit of a disaster last week when two of the applicants for our Miss Beautiful Beehive contest dropped out of the running. They were picked up by the police and charged with solicitation. All a terrible misunderstanding of course but we can't possibly have them in the contest, the scandal would be ruinous.

Is there any chance that you'd like to enter the contest? First prize is $25,000 and as I'm one of the judges I think I can say that you'd be in with a very good chance if you know what I mean. If you're interested let me know and I can send you an application form.

I e-mailed Garry with some further information so hopefully he's getting on with the release of the funds to your care.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Reverend Bob

26-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I have heard nothing from Garry since I sent him the rest of the information at the beginning of last week. Is he away on business at the moment? Perhaps he has decided that he doesn't want to work with me after all.

I am very worried for you and with all my time being taken up in arranging our Gala Dinner I'm concerned that you have no-one to look after your interests.

What do you think I should do? The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Garry Young

Thursday, May 26, 2005

We are resending this email that was sent on the 16 May 2005 due to complaint from Ms. Hope that we are negleting our job. Please do read.

Attn: Reverend Bob,

Dear Sir,
Thanks for your email and I am very glad that our personal differences have been settled, now let's get don to business. I got your email and the contents was very well understood. Now I would like to send you our response. We don't care about your change of name,


... repeats all that from the 16th...

Regards,
Garry Young
Uyiedo Security & Finance Company


Reverend Bob

27-May-05

Thank you for your message. I'm going to beat the Rumpo Conference Centre in Great Moose until early next week at the 8th Annual Navel Lint Collectors Busy Bee Convention.

I will reply to your message on my return.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

31-May-05

Dear Gary,

I am sorry that you have been put to all the extra trouble but it seems as though my last e-mail has gone astray. I've checked as much as I can over here and I'm sure that it was sent to your correct address although you do seem to have more than one address but then I suppose a busy executive like yourself needs all the latest communication tools. Maybe you should check your secretary as well, I know how difficult it is to get good help these days.

So as I said in my previous e-mail - Good news!! I found my passport in my old Marine footlocker. That brought back some memories I can tell you. Have you ever served in the military? It's a great life for a real man. If you have any children and they need some backbone then get them to enlist in the US Marines as soon as they are able. You get an education, learn new skills, visit some wonderful countries and get to meet some interesting people. Of course you have to do some killing occasionally but that's pretty much par for the course these days and we musn't be squeamish about defending our flag and this great country of ours from the forces of evil.

Anyhow I'm attaching my passport as requested. Hope the stains don't come through too strong on the copy. That was our last night in Juicy Lucy's Girlie Bar in Quang Tri. What an night that was!! Of course I've now seen the error my ways and follow the path of the Supreme Queen.

I'll also be speaking with Miss Hope regarding the money and should have that sorted in a week or so. You sure you want euro currency? Still seems like US$ would be better not to mention a whole lot easier.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas





Reverend Bob

31-May-05

Dearest Hope,

I did get a message from Gary Young and it seems as though he never received my last message. He also says that you complained to him and to be honest I'm not surprised. I keep sending him e-mails as requested and a lot of the time he ignores everything I've said.

You might want to check on something before you send him the payment he needs. In his last e-mail he says the fee outstanding is Euro 2,500 but in his first e-mail he wrote that it was Euro 1,500 - he's claiming it was a typing error. That might be true but how do you know that it wasn't 1,500 all along and he's just looking to increase the charge. I'm sure he thinks that you're just a poor silly young woman without anyone to look after her but he doesn't realise that I'll be by your side all the way.

I've sent him a copy of my passport again so he should be able to release your funds as soon as you send him the fee.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Hope Nosa

Wednesday, June 1, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

I tried to see if I could send the money to them, but I found out that I don't have all the money, at present, I have €2000 Euro, but I can send €1000 Euro only so that I can hold €1000 for my personal needs before I get more money, so you have to help me to send the balance €1500 Euro to them and I will reimbourse you as soon as I get more money.

As for the letter of nomination, I called my sister and she told me that she has already sent it to the security company and that she did not make any copy of it, it got me angry but there's nothing I can do, but I can send you the letter of acceptance as soon as i am through with it, but I have to be sure of the payment first, I can even send it to you in word format so that you can modify it and send it bck to me, or if you can help me to compose it, please do and send it to me in word format so that I can print it out and sign and send it to them

Please let me know what you think?

Hope

Reverend Bob

05-Jun-05
Subject : Remain calm at all times

Dearest Hope,

I can sure see why you're angry with that sister of yours. How foolish of her not to keep a copy but then I suppose we should always try to forgive and turn the other cheek.

I have to admit to being a mite confused about all this paperwork that needs to be completed and returned and so forth. Can you please tell me exactly what I need to do and if you have any forms or letters to complete then please do send them on to me. The sooner we get this done the sooner you can get your money released and the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

As regards the payment of the fee I should have guessed that being as how you're a refugee and all that you wouldn't have that much money. To be honest I'm surprised that you have as much as you say, I hope you haven't been doing anything nasty. Anyhow I realised there's an easy solution. Why don't you/we simply authorise Garry to withdraw his companies fees from your account? Sometimes the simplest answers are the most difficult to see!!

I have to go now and officiate at the Laying on of Hands Ceremony for one of our new converts, Sister Sledge. It involves annointing the young woman with the amber nectar until she becomes receptive to the Holy Stinger. At that point it becomes a truly moving and emotional experience for both of us as we enter a state of reverend rapture and become co-pollenated.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Wednesday, June 8, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

How are you? I have called the security and finance company and they told m that they are not going to withdraw the fe fro the fund because of insurance, please can you help me withany amount of moneyto complete the fee?

Hope

Reverend Bob

08-Jun-05
Subject : Salvation is at hand

Dearest Hope.

I am sorry to hear that the security company can't help and I suppose they're quite correct. Isn't it encouraging to know that they are acting in such a professional manner. I had my doubts about Gary but it does seem as though he runs a tight ship (do you know what that means?)

I hope you haven't forgotten about our own security measures because the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy. You can never be too careful.

Now I don't want you to worry about anything at all. I'm going to speak to a good friend of mine, Herman Weiner, the CEO of Herman's Honies, about this and I hope that we'll have the money sorted out by the end of the week. Herman's a hard nosed businessman but behind his rough, tough exterior he has a heart of gold, especially when the fairer sex is concerned.

I know for a fact that he's taken a personal interest in many a young lady who's down on her luck and he can often be seen driving around late at night in his pickup looking for yet another fallen angel that he can personally take under his wing. Such a wonderful and generous man.

So please be patient, I'm sure I will have good news for you by the end of the week.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Thursday, June 9, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

How are you today? I hope you are doing fine? I guess you do, because the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I am very glad that we are almost done with this transaction and I am also glad that you are assiting me to pay the balance of the fee. I pray that God lays it in your friend's heart to assist us. I wait your next email.

Hope

Reverend Bob

11-Jun-05
Subject : Grunions grunions everywhere

Dearest Hope,

The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy which means that Herman Weiner is in a generous mood.

After I received your last message I called him to see whether he had made a decision. As you know he's extremely busy running his business empire and when I spoke to him he was just in the middle of ministering to a couple of young ladies and teaching them how to behave.

Herman was in a wonderfully good mood despite his exertions and has agreed to pay the full amount of Euro 2,500. Is that not the best news you've ever heard. Apparently he was really touched when I told him your story and it stirred something within him. He's keen to meet you and see whether you would be suitable for his private office.

Now of course Herman's no fool and he's one smart businessman I can tell you so he's sending me a letter of confirmation which should be here on Monday, I can call you then. He also mentioned something about his conditions but to be honest I'm not sure what that means. I hope he's not ill or come down with some nasty disease.

I hope this news will fill your heart with happiness and I hope you will join me in lifting your voice in thanks to the Supreme Bee. BUZZ BUZZ

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Monday, June 13, 2005

HI REVEREND BOB,

There alsways seems to be Hope just because The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I am very glad to hear of the latest development, I am very proud of you, thanks Reverend, you have all my love and prayers, waiting to hear from you soon.

Hope

Reverend Bob

14-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

I received Herman's letter this morning. I mentioned to you that old Herman was no fool when it comes to business and I can see why he's built up his business so successfully over the years.

As I told you last week he's prepared to pay all the fee that is required by the security company but he wants to make the payment using his company funds. He wants to write off the expense as a tax deductible for advertising and promotion.

I called him at his office and what he needs is a photo of you holding one of their company posters advertising Herman's Honies or wearing one of their promotional T-shirts. I've told him that it will take far too long too long to get a poster or a T-shirt sent out to you and that he should be more reasonable.

He finally agreed that if you can send me a photo of yourself holding a sign with his advertising slogan in front of you then his accountants will be happy. I must admit to being slightly disappointed at Herman but it's his money after all and the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

Herman wants to make sure the wording on the poster is visible and has suggested that each of the letters is written in black and at least 8 inches high. I've told him that you are not a fool and don't need to be instructed in this way but he was insistent.

One last bit of good news, I persuaded Herman to also pay for any expenses you make in getting the photo and the sign made up. When you send the photo just let me have a note of what it cost and he'll send the cash direct to you. Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Subject : why doing this to me?

Hi Reverend Bob,
I saw your mail and i cant really belive myself see what you wrote to me, first who do you think i am and why did you say i should snap a pictures by holding names. i am really disappointed in you, i which you know you could have tell me that, at the begining that you dont want to help me is better than all this bullshit that you want me to do. i am sorry i can do anything that you say here, if you guys cant help me forget about it ok. i pray the lord should show you the understanding, how do you think that i beliver will do what you say when i am not a unbeliver.

i will still contuine praying till the lord show me the rightful person that can me and my family out of this problem.

bye for now,

Anna.

Reverend Bob

15-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

I am shocked and saddened by your use of profanity and foul language. After all I have done to help you I am quite frankly disappointed at your attitude. I am also concerned that you have not used our agreed security control.

I certainly won't speak further with Herman Weiner as I know he will be so shocked that he's most likely to withdraw his offer to pay your fees and expenses and all because the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I understand that you are in desperate need of your dear departed father's money to help you and your family. Perhaps I can just explain to you how business works and then maybe you'll see that this is the path to your future. I'm sure you have friends that are in business so by all means speak with them if you don't believe me.

Herman Weiner runs a very successfull and highly profitable company. When he makes payments from his company he can only do so for a legitimate business reason. In this case he's happy to pay €2,500 plus your expenses but he needs evidence that the money was spent as a business expense. Now obviously you can't provide an invoice for goods or services so Herman suggested that you advertise his product.

A simple request to provide a photograph of yourself with his company's name and slogan. It seems to me that considering he'll be sending you a lot of money you're being very selfish and dare I say rather foolish to throw away a golden opportunity to have released to your custody an amount of $9.8M.

Now I know that you're only a young girl and not experienced in the ways of life but take it from me, this is an opportunity that you cannot afford to miss.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

15-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I think you ought to know that I think there has been a security breach.

I received earlier today a message supposedly from your e-mail address but it was signed by someone called 'Anna'. There was no security control in the e-mail and I am fearful that someone may be after your money. Please take extra security precautions.

I replied to the e-mail so that this person didn't get suspicious but do take extra care. I spoke to Herman this morning and he's got the money all ready for you and as soon as you send the photgraph he'll send the money to the security company.

You must be so pleased that this whole affair is now so close to completion. Another week or so and you're going to be a very rich young lady.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Thursday, June 16, 2005
Subject : Peace of the lord be with you.

Hi Reverend Bob,

I saw your mail today and i really appreciate your enfort in helping me in this transaction. first, i will like to tell you that, if this is only way that you want to help me, simply tell mr Herman that i cant do what he want because i am a christain besides i am not a star or adverister of a company. as you know that i am in pastoral school i dont have that time ok. if this is the only way that you have to help me and i think we better forget about everything, Again thanks for your all your assistancce right from the begining and pls kindly understand me too.

I am really sorry for the mail that i wrote to you yesterday, it was not my fault, it was how i feel bad in my heart that is why i wrote that, pls i beg for your forgiveness about that. may the lord be with you and your family.

Hope.



Reverend Bob

17-Jun-05

Never give up

Dearest Hope,

Is that you? I've had one e-mail from someone called Anne that came from your e-mail address and today one mail signed in your name but it did not contain the security wording.

I am very worried about your safety, a young lady who is about to become a very rich young lady could easily become a victim.

Please respond to this e-mail using our agreed security wording. I won't use the same words just in case your account is being monitored by criminal elements.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

17-Jun-05

I need your help

Dear Garry,

I'm really worried about Miss Hope. In the last few days I've received some communications from her e-mail account but I believe that her security has been compromised. Firstly I had an e-mail signed by someone called 'Anna' and then two more signed in the name of 'Hope'.

What is important is that none of these e-mails contained the agreed security phrase. We had agreed that the absence of this phrase from an e-mail would indicate a major problem.

I had warned Miss Hope of the dangers she could face if it became known that she was going to be a very rich young lady and I am now so worried that she may have been kidnapped and her life is at risk.

Have you been in touch with her at all recently? Do you know if she is safe?

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas

Sponsored by Herman's Honies - They're finger lickin' good


Hope Nosa

Friday, June 17, 2005

Hi Reverend,

Thank you for very much for your email, I know very well that the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy, but the fact is that I am begining to get fed up of the whole thing, and your friend is not helping matters, is he really a christian? why should he want me to do such thing before he helps? if that is the only way he is going to help me, then I think I don't need his kind of help, I need an uncoditional assistance, not a conditioned one. I got a call from the security & finance company today and they told me that you wanted me to write them, so hence my email, if you are sure my email address has been bugged, then I can open another one and forfait this one.

Thanks reverend, you have been good to me.

Hope

Reverend Bob

19-Jun-05

Try, try and try again

Dearest Hope,

When the grunions fly high and the spurlocks are shalloppy my heart sings to receive your kind words.

You must remain strong and keep your faith. How can you contemplate giving up your rightful inheritance when you are so close to victory.

After today's Sunday service I had the opportunity to meet Herman Weiner and discuss your case. It took some considerable time and to be perfectly honest I was exhausted by the time we'd finished. I think I may have mentioned to you before that our's is a silent order and to negotiate on your behalf by using sign language means that a simple half hour conversation turns into a marathon five hour signing session.

Anyhow I hope I managed to persuade Herman that you were not just another girl on the make and after his fortune as you were wealthy in your own right and just needed some help in securing the money. Herman had his accountant with him which was a shame because he is the one who has told Herman that unless he can get evidence that the payment is a business expense then it will be disallowed as a tax expense and possibly reported to the IRS under Section 47(ix)(ii) of the Business Tax Statute 1998 as being 'a payment made purely misanthropic purposes with the intention of denying the people a benefit'. Let me tell you that my answer to this involved a lot of signing of a vigorous nature.

Please let me reassure you on this point, there is no question of your photo and the slogan ever being used for advertising or marketing, it is simply a way to keep the accountant happy. To use the photograph without your permission would be a breach of the law here in the USA and you would be entitled to payment of millions of dollars for invasion of privacy.

I'm not sure what else I can do on this but I'm certainly happy to work with any suggestion you may have. If it's any consolation Herman showed me an envelope that contains around €5,000 which he says is to cover your banking fees and any expenses you incur in having the photo of you and the wording.

I hope you don't mind but I'm also going to write to Garry Young to see if he can help at all.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

19-Jun-05

Hope springs eternal

Dear Garry,

I hope that you don't mind me writing to you on this matter but I am concerned that Miss Hope's innocence in the ways of the world is going to prevent her from obtaining the funds that you hold at your company.

I have been able to arrange for payment of your fees by a generous benefactor and successfull businessman whom I will refer to as Mr W. You and he share much in common not least your knowledge of how business matters are conducted.

We all know that any well run business must have the proper paperwork before payments can be made or funds released, you are an excellent example of this. Mr W wants the same thing for his money and although I have explained Miss Hope's circumstances both Mr W and his accoutants are insistent that there is 'proper' evidence for the payment.

After much discussion Mr W has agreed that a photo of Miss Hope holding a sign that displays his company's name and slogan will be sufficient for him to release the money. I'm afraid that Miss Hope feels that Mr W is going to use the photo to promote his product and nothing I can say will convince her otherwise. If he ever wanted to use the photo Miss Hope would then need to be paid many thousands of dollars in advertising fees and royalties, here in the USA the law is extremely strict and after the OJ Act was introduced the unauthorised use of photographs is punishable by death in all but four States.

If you have the opportunity e-mail Miss Hope and confirm there is absolutely nothing to worry about in sending the photograph that would be a great help.

Thank you and may God pour bounteous blessings on your bonce. Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Hope Nosa

Monday, June 20, 2005

Hi Reverend Bob,

I thank you again for your concern and assistance, but it is very hard to do what your friend wants especially When the grunions fly high and the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I have tried to figure out why he really needs this advert of a thing, I have said that I am not interested, so let him find someone else to do his advert, I am not greedy nor after his money, I know his intention, I am not after his or any body's else's money, so let him go with his money, I don't care if he showed you an envelop of €1000000, let him go away with his money for all I care.

Money, doesn't entice me, so your telling me that he showed you an envelop with money is like an insult to me, I don't need it, so he can go to where he belongs, together with his accountant, y'all making me to laugh, well we Africans are not as stupid as y'all think, we are not wise, but we can know good from bad, thank him very much for his offer, tell him to forget about it. If it is the will of God that I get this done, good, but if it is not his will, then nothing any body can do about it.

I have told one or two persons here about the whole situation and they are so supprised by your email, you always take side with your friend, and this make the two of you complice, and they have warned me to even be careful with you, Are you really a Man of God Reverend Bob or whatever?

Hope.

Reverend Bob

22-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

My dear child I am afraid that you have completely misunderstood what has been written. I can only apologise for your feelings of concern and upset because I cannot have explained properly what is needed. I need to keep in mind that you are a good Christian girl who is studying hard to make a better life fore herself and her family. You are not used to the ways of the business world.

Let me see if I can explain it more clearly for you. Please also speak with Garry Young, he is a businessman and will also confirm what is needed to run a professional business. I think Garry also mentione his own accountant in one his e-mails, please do speak with him as well.

Herman Weiner is more than happy to pay the fees charged by the security company but he is going to make the payment from his business Weiner Honey Inc which sells it's products as 'Herman's Honies'. All businesses in the USA have to be audited by the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) and all payments made must have paperwork to be allowed as a tax deductible.

Perhaps it was my fault but I told Mr Weiner that you wouldn't be able to submit a proper invoice for the fees and his accountant suggested the idea of your photo holding something that identified 'Herman's Honies' would be accepted by the IRS.

It will never be used for advertising in any way shape or form. As to your comments about 'Africans' I should point out that Herman Weiner is an African American and extremely proud of his heritage, he believes that his family originated from Senegal.

I hope you don't mind but I have asked Mr Weiner to contact you directly to see if a direct conversation between the two of you would make things easier especially as the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

One last point, down here in Texas the display of lots of money is not seen as insulting indeed it's a pretty normal part of everyday life. Mr Weiner is a multi-millionaire several times over and carrying large amounts of cash on his person is perfectly normal.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Herman Weiner

23-Jun-05
to hope_nosa

I have been asked by Reverend Bob to write you as it seems he's just gone and confused everything. He's a genial old buffer and means well but to tell you the truth he's not that clever and more often than not ends up making a mess of things.

What he's explained to me is that you need some assistance to help you look after your family.

I'm sure you know by now that I control The Weiner Foundation which is a grant making trust founded (by me) in 1994 to provide financial assistance for refugees looking for a new start in life. I'm particularly interested in helping refugees from Africa as that is where my ancestors originated before they were taken as slaves to America some time in the early 1800's.

I believe that Bob's told you I'm happy to authorise the Foundation to make a grant available. There's a bit of paperwork to get sorted out but nothing that is either complicated or difficult. So far this year we have made grants totally $117,650 to over 70 applicants and we are currently considering a further six or so.

Hope this makes the position clear for you and I'll look forward to meeting you at the grant award ceremony.

Yours sincerely
Herman Weiner





Hope Nosa

Thursday, June 23, 2005

I just sent a mail to Herman when the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shallopy.

I told him that if that is the only way he wants to help me, he should forget it, but what baffles me now is that I really don't know why he wants that picture so dearly, I have said that I don't need his assistance any more, but he won't let me be, but what I told him is that, maybe we would do it this way, let me have the money and once I do, I will send him the picture, just as he wants it, because I am not even sure that once he has the picture, he will send me the money. So let me have the money first, or if he needs advert, then let us sign a contract and then he pays me for that, then I will advertize his company, but for that, please tell him to forget about it. I know what he needs it to do one of our pastors here gave me a site to visit and I saw exactly just what he is asking me to do, I saw Africans with pictures and logos, some were even naked, I know that's what he wants to do with it and there are no two ways about it.

Hope



Reverend Bob

26-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

What can I say other than I am shocked. I had no idea that Herman Weiner had made such improper suggestions to you. To think that he used pictures of naked people to advertise his products is simply appalling. I had no idea but it does seem to be a very odd way to try and sell honey. Under no circumstances must you take your clothes off.

I will be writing to him immediately and demand an explanation. I know that he is on a business trip to Europe at the moment but I'm sure that there will be a simple explanation to all of this. He really is such a nice, decent family man.

You must have patience when the grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Reverend Bob

29-Jun-05

Dearest Hope,

If you have faith all will be rewarded. I've just had an e-mail from Herman Weiner that I think will make you very happy He's spending a few days at his villa in Spain which is in somewhere called 'Marbella'. I don't have a map but he insists this is not far from where you are studying. The grunions fly high when the spurlocks are shalloppy.

I've persuaded him that he can then meet with you and hand over the money and get his receipt at the same time. He's still very keen to get a photo with you for the Weiner Foundation newsletter. I'vbe told him that you won't mind this and you'll understand that a registered not-for-profit grant making foundation needs to demonstrate the good works they carry out.

He's going to be involved in meetings over the next day or so but has promised to send you the details.

Isn't this the best news? I'm sure at times you must have been very despondent but all your patience has been justified.

Go with God buzz buzz

Reverend Bob
Church of the Blessed Beehive
Little Pecker, Texas



Herman Weiner

1-Jul-05

Dear Ms Nosa,

I have now completed my business in Amsterdam, Hamburg and Frankfurt and will spend a few days at my villa in Marbella. I'm having extensive refurbishment works carried out at the moment but the East Wing is quite habitable.

Reverend Bob tells me that you are in Malaga which is just up the road.

Can I suggest that we meet and we can complete the formalities for payment of the grant to you from the Weiner Foundation. Let me know when you are available.

Kind regards
Herman Weiner



Herman Weiner

3-Jul-05

Bob,

At your insistence I wrote to the lady in question. No reply. What's the deal here?

I'm now in Marbella but will be flying on later this week. If she wants the funds from the Weiner Foundation then she's going to have to get a move on. I might be back in Spain before after next week but no promises.

I've copied the message to Nosa and the other addresses you gave me. Who is this Gary Young character? You haven't mentioned him before?

Herman



more to come?

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