This one rates its own listing because it drags in the "Ghana liquefied gas project". It uses the term "kick backs" quite openly. And, like so many of these other brilliant pieces of humor, it is an "urgent and strictly confidential" message sent to a total stranger by e-mail. We were overcome by the urge to annotate. Sorry. Sometimes it happens.

Based on the information and highly esteemed recommendation made about you, by a reputable source in our country's chamber of commerce and industry that guaranteed your reliability and trust worthiness in business dealings [ yeah yeah yeah ], i wish to propose this lucrative business deal for our mutual benefits.

I and my colleagues are top officials of contract award and monitoring committee for the Federal Government of Nigeria (Nigeria/west Africa) and the senior auditors of the Nigeria National Petroleum Corporation (N.N.P.C) and Ghana liquefied gas project here in our possession, Document to remit the sum of U.S.$22,500,000.00 (Twenty-Two Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars only) into a reliable foreign account for our personal use. This sum originated form kick backs and over-invoiced contracts for the supply of petrochemical and pipeline equipment to the Nigeria National Petroleum Corporation (N.N.P.C) and Ghana liquefied natural gas project by a Bulgarian company in July, 1990 the bonafide contractors had since been paid in full.

However, the over-invoiced sum in the contract payment voucher to the tune of U.S.$22,500,000.00 (Twenty-Two Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars Only) has been approved for payment as part of the grand total for project executed.

Meeting have been held in respect of this, with other reputable officials in the corporation, Federal Ministry of finance and Central Bank of Nigeria and conclusion arrived at to collaborate with a foreign firm to claim this fund for our mutual benefit for this reason i was mandated to communicate you for maximum assistance and co-operation.

An agreement has been reached to share the money thus:
1.30% for you, the account owner 2.5% set aside for local and international expenses 3.65% for us the officials.

We want your total support and promise that you will not disappoint us by denying us our own share of the fund, because we are not allowed to operate foreign accounts (i.e. civil servants) by Nigeria law. We intend to invest our share of the money in your country or better still purchase goods for resale in Nigeria. [Patriotic, eh?]

    Note: OK I have to break in here - what they are saying is, they are massive thieves, but they are putting themselves at your mercy and hope you will not turn around and rip them off. Just in case you didn't notice.