Verily Scamorama is like a man of seventy years, and yet was not able to prove that the Tale of the Mugu should be told at night, until Ben Zona explained it:
i am to sending yuo a big shalom from israle!!!!! a marveluous web siite habibi
her is my frist trying ot be scambating wihtth a mugu. i could hav ebeen to keping it goinng for awile but i was gotting to busy at the time yuo know!!!!!!!!
Aug 12 2007
May I be granted the opportunity to introduce myself, I am Mr. Patrick Fong Managing Director and Chief Operating Officer of the foreign operations department of Hang Seng Bank ltd, Taikoo Shing Branch. I have an obscured business suggestion for you. Before the U.S and Iraqi war our client Salman Jaber Salman who was a business man made a numbered fixed deposit with a value of Eighteen Million Euros only (18,000,000) in my branch. Upon maturity several notices was sent to him, during the Iraq war. Again after the war another notification was sent and still no response came from Him. It came to our notice that the man (Salman Jaber Salman) and his entire family had been murdered during the war in a bomb blast.
Your urgent response is anticipated so please email me through this email: firstname.lastname@example.org for more details on this transaction as soon as possible. This should be kept very secret and confidential. I believe you know.
Mr. Patrick Fong
Aug 16 2007
Hello Petrick FUng
Don't know how I helping you out
You get my details from the Israeli Government, but who is giving you my private email from Australia
(This is my last time obeying English sentence structure and capitalisation. My typing gets noticeably worse from here on in. Also note that "Ben Zona" is Hebrew for "son of a prostitute".)
Aug 18 2007
Good Day Gregory,
May I be granted the opportunity to introduce myself again; I am Mr. Patrick Fong Managing Director and Chief Operating Officer of the foreign operations department of Hang Seng Bank ltd, Taikoo Shing Branch. I have an obscured business suggestion for you. Before the U.S and Iraqi war our client Salman Jaber Salman who was with the Iraqi Military forces, and also a business man made a numbered fixed deposit for 3 years, with a value of Eighteen Million Euros only in my branch. Upon maturity several notices were sent to him, during the Iraq war. Again after the war another notification was sent and still no response came from him. It came to our notice that the man (Salman Jaber Salman) and his entire family had been murdered during the war in a bomb blast. You can read more about the bombings on visiting this site below:
Right now in my bank under an alias which only the two of us knew about as the confidentiality of the matter was necessary for his protection. Due to his untimely death, the funds have been sitting in the account ever since and will continue to do so perpetually unless we do something about it.
This is where you come in. I located you through an agency that helps seek people by their email. My client did not declare any next of kin in his official papers including the paper work of his bank deposit of Eighteen Million Euros.. Against this backdrop, my suggestion to you is that I would like you as a foreigner to stand as the next of kin to our client so that you will be able to receive his funds. I want you to know that I have had everything planned out so that we can come out successfully. I have contacted an attorney that will prepare the necessary documents that will back you up as the next of kin to my client. All that is required from you at this stage is for you to provide me with your Full Names and Address so that the attorney can commence his job.
After you have been made the next of kin, the attorney will also file in for claims on your behalf and secure the necessary approval and letter of probate in your favor for the move of the funds to an account that you will provide. There is no risk involved at all in the matter as we are going to adopt a legalized method and the attorney will prepare all the necessary documents. Once approved, the entire transaction should take no longer than twelve business days after which we will go about our daily businesses, but just millions of Euros richer.
As you can see this is easier than taking a candy from a baby, but mind you, trust is something that is developed over time and that is something that we do not have. The transfer can only be authorized into your account by my department of which I happen to be the head. The money will be transferred from my bank to an account which I will advice you to provide. So I have to let you know that it will be highly unfeasible to try to cheat on me with the money because you only, will be able to make transfer of the money in and out of the account. So please, there should be no room for greed. The allocation of our money will be as follows: 30% to you for your part in this, 60% for me and 10% for any unforeseeable expenses we may incure. I think this is extremely fair, as you have nothing to lose but just a little time. I will assume all responsibilities for this endeavor. Your urgent response is anticipated. This should be kept very secret and confidential. I believe you know.
Mr. Patrick Fong.
Hang Seng Bank Ltd
Fu Shan Mansion 25
Taikoo Shing Road ,
Taikoo Shing Branch
(Who the hell is Gregory?)
(Euros? Not even imaginary dollars anymore?)
Aug 19 2007
who is this gregory????? I am not gregroy
what to being my address on agency? what agency did you to read? did agency use isareli govenmet website to get my email?????
cna i receive moneys even thou i am israeli from iraqi account? ????? ?
please to explain more FUng i want money what do i must to do?????????
Aug 20 2007
Ben Zona ,
Thank you very much for your response, and your interest in this transaction, I'm sorry about the name error, Like I said before, due to this issue on my hands now, it became necessary for me to seek your assistance, I appreciate the fact that you are ready to assist me in executing this project. You should not have anything to worry about. I will do everything legally required to ensure that the project goes smoothly, it shall pass through all Laws of International Banking.
Having agreed to entrust this project into your hands, I want to remind you that, it needs your commitment and diligent follow up. If you work seriously, the entire matter should be over in a couple of days. Please understand that this deal would be done strictly via e-mail as I don't want any trace discussing about this on phone for lingual purpose.
READ THE FOLLOWING AND GET BACK TO ME:
Firstly, I will want to know your occupation, you should note that this project is highly capital intensive. This is why I have to be very careful. I need your total devotion and trust to see this through. I know we have not met before, but I am very confident that we will be able to establish the necessary trust that we need to execute this project.
I am now in contact with a foreign online bank. I now intend that you open an account in your name in this foreign bank. The money would be transferred to your account which you will open in the bank for both of us, this is the best way, I have found to get this money out of my bank, and the main reason for this is that, if we use this online bank, the transfer would be seen as an In-house bank to bank transfer as the online bank has the same telex type as my bank (Hang Seng Bank) and it also solves the problem of transferring. I want us to enjoy this money in peace when we conclude. So you should listen to my instructions and follow them diligently.
Also you have to know that I cannot transfer this money in my name as my bank will be aware that it is from me. This is where I need you. As result of this, you will have to open an account in the corresponding bank. I will obtain a certificate of deposit from this my bank; it will be issued in your name. This will make you the owner of the funds, after this, the money will be banked online for both of us as I will personally make the transfer from my bank to your account which you will open with the online bank.
We can then instruct the bank to transfer our various shares into our respective home bank accounts. I will also perfect the documentations with the assistance of my attorney to give the project the legal rights so please do not worry about this. I would appreciate you send me a copy of your National Identity (Driver's license or An International Passport). As soon as I get these from you I shall commerce with the paper work and would as well send you a copy of my Work ID. The money in question is big and I want to ensure that I know you well before I proceed to give you all the details to commence the project.
I will send the name and contact details of the correspondence online bank to you so that you can have an open communication with them. Ensure that you keep this project confidential; do not discuss it with anybody, because of the confidential nature of this project and my work. Please confirm to me you got this mail so I could advice how we proceed
Please reply soonest.
Mr. PATRICK FONG
Aug 20 2007
i must to know please if isareli ciitzen can receive moneys from iraqi dead peoples. you know habibi iraq and israel are butter enemies with no relations diplomacy so i do not knowing if i can be receivng the moneys please to let me know
in my position in the governmet i cannot open bank acouunt in another country - you are manager of teh bank and mr cheif operating offcier you must to do this for me because i cannot. i think in my name it may be to difficult but if you can open acount in an alais i can help out????? my ocupation i can tell you i am adviser to MK Zayin Katan of sheten party in israel
i am happy to do all this things on email not on phone because my english i cna understand btu my wiriting and typiing is very not good. also governmet here own my phone and the shin bet hear all things?????
is this aginst the law?????? there is seeming much of to moving moneys from acounts
(Some translations. "Habibi" = friend. "Zayin Katan" = "small penis". "Sheten" = urine. )
Aug 21 2007
Thanks for your prompt response and interest in this transaction. Please I would like to make clear to you here that this transaction has nothing to do with the diplomatic rift between Iraq and Israeli. Opening the account on my own is not what I can do, that is why I have contacted you.
Of course Israeli people can receive Iraq dead monies, as long as the person is dead, and I have every documents to backup your claim and all I want you to do is not against the law. Opening the account should be very easy since the bank you will be opening the account with is in United Kingdom . If you do not feel comfortable with this, then you will have to tell me if you can Travel down to United Kingdom . If truly you can travel down to the United Kingdom , then I will do everything within my connection to Move the funds down to a finance company in the United Kingdom . Then you will have to go there in person to sign for the release of the Funds. Please get back to me as soon as possible. I wait to read from you.
Mr. Patrick Fong
(Whereas to receive "dead monies" from people who aren't dead wouldn't be quite right.)
Aug 21 2007
i don't not travel to often - when the minisiter travels i go with him.. i can live to ingland but not until after the tzeptmber when we go to euorpe in paris in france . my boss ZAYIN KATAN he working very hard. he put the member in member of the knesset he work so hard
now we are to talking abuot a lots of euros here. you said i am to getting 30% of 18$ euros, so beofre i head off to ingland i have a few questoins for you habibi?????? 1. it is good that you mentins i cna get dead iraqi money/ we israleis work very hard and not for much money so i cna make benefit from this, but i do not understand why a lot of countries???? yuo are bank manger in hong kong, but you cannot open up a bank account in your own bank?????? that is what a the cheif operating offcier does - he operates??????
2. why if he dead iraqi people open accuont with you in hong kong i hav eto go to ingland/????/?
3. why if the hang seng bank in hongkong i must go to ingland???? for thsi much mony maybe head office is deals with this????
4. why do i have to go anwyhere???? surly a cheif operating offcier operates with the fax machin.??????
5. how cna i trust yuo????? how can you trus t me????? you dont know me/????
please excuse questoins but its' not everday tht bank manger offers me bussiness propporsition. there is old isralei expresion: if the falafel look like gold its only a reflection from the hummus. you understadn me????? i beleive you know
(There's no such Israeli expression, but maybe there ought to be.)
Aug 22 2007
Thanks for your prompt response and interest in this business. I believe you don't understand much about this transaction and I'm always ready to explain to you better.
Mr. Salman jaber who is an Iraqi, used to live and work in Hong Kong . We both met and secretly discussed about depositing the money in my branch, which no one else knew about. I'm seeking your help here to act as his Next of Kin, so we could both get this money out of my Bank and I have every necessary document backing this claim. Being a Bank Manager, it doesn't make sense transferring the total sum into my bank account, because there are Monetary Bodies monitoring every transactions made from my bank. This is why I have asked you to set-up a new account. I'm asking you to set-up an Intermediary account with a Well know bank to me in the UK , then I can transfer the total sum into the account, so you can make further telegraphic transfer from it. I would appreciate you read my previous messages carefully and understand me better. The bank which I would refer you to is a Bank that shares the same Telex Type with my bank and the transfer from my bank will be seen as an In-house transfer, then we wouldn't have any problem with the Monetary Bodies.
Ben, you have to read my messages carefully so you could understand me better. Now there are 2 options transferring the money out of my bank, which is the most important step. ( 1) It's either you open an online account which I can transfer the total money into then you can make further transfer into our various accounts OR (2) I will try my best within my connections to move the total Money to a finance company in the UK, then you go down there to sign up the release. Please try to read carefully and understand me.
About trust, this is what we have to build as we are getting to know each other better and as time goes on we could both find trust in ourselves. There is a large room for trust between us, as you and know this transaction involves a huge sum and there should be no room for greed. I'm waiting to hear from you.
Mr. Patrick Fong
August 22 2007
yuo are very smart men. that is whyh yuo a bank manger!!!!!!!!!1
abuot the trust - yuo are absluoutley corect. i dont knwo anything abuot you????? abuot me what can i say!!!!! i am isarli gentelmen, age 46, 3 childern, there is my wife NAKNIKIAH, oldest boy is of 18 years name NUDNIK, next i have girl of 16 years name SHAVARMA, the yungest boy MAMZER of 10 years old. i am top party advicer for zayin katan in sheten party in israle (you know alreday). i live in kfar zevel, just otside kikar tehina in the north of contry,
are yuo in having married, fung????? do yuo have childern? i wuold like to know more abuot yuo befor i can fully to trust yuo. ar you religous????? if not, thats ok. just asking!!!!1
for yuor quesitoins abuot the monyes 1) i dont knwo abut online acount. my internet is from the office in the knesset, adn all computers ar to be seen carfully by the shin bet. the shin bet is the internal secrutiy, we can try thou???????
2) which bank in ingland???? i may meet yuo there???? if you are in isarel maybe w e cna meet?
(I was just using random silly words for names and placenames. To wit: "Naknikiah" = sausage. "Nudnik" = pest. "Shavarma" = shawarma/lamb kebab. "Mamzer" = bastard. "Kfar Zevel" = something like "Garbage Plains". "Kikar Tehina" = Tehina Square (tehina is the sauce you put on a falafel). Shin Bet is the Internal Security Service, as opposed to Mossad, which is external.)
August 22, 2007
Thanks for your prompt response. I really appreciate your sincerity towards making this transaction a successful one. I have a family too. A lovely wife and 2 kids. (Boy 18 and Girl 22). I have been in Banking for over 20 years now.
Back to business.
Ben, I believe you know the nature of this transaction and you should understand we have to get things done as soon as possible.. There is really not much time to wait. I want you to make up your mind on something. I believe there will be no alert or security watch over your Account. So if you open an account in UK , there will be no one monitoring your transaction from the account, just you. So you should have no worries about that. I am in Hong Kong now, not England so I don't think we can meet in England . You can choose to go to England if that's the best for you. All that matters most right now is getting the money transferred out of my bank. I really want you to make up your mind so I can give to you the details of the Bank. I will be waiting to read from you.
Mr. Patrick Fong
(Now that his personal stuff is out of the way... Geesh, this guy doesn't give too much away, and still hopelessly lost at getting him off script.)
Aug 22 2007
very late at night ok fung
with me yuo alwyays get sinceer i work for teh govermet!!!!! i belleive you know>>>
its nice to work with antoher femily men. i hope yur kids make you pruod like my little mamzer and nudnik do for me you know/???? shavarma she also a little lamb, you know/????
anohter questoin why is theere such a need for being very quiickily????? the irquai dead men is still dead adn the monyes sit in purpurtutiety as you say in frist email?????
but we israrelis like to live for the present time, as the old experession goes eat all yuor bamba now becuase the next katyusha is aruond the conrner
ok mr cheif officer. hwo do i open accont?
(Bamba is a brand of Israeli snack food. A Katyusha is the favourite rocket of Hezbollah.)
Aug 24 2007
Thanks for your co operation. I really appreciate you interest in this transaction. I believe you have made up your mind to open the account. If that's the case, then I thank you for showing some great responsibility and trust. Please do not let me down. I have contacted the attorney who will put together the perfected paper work to be sent to the bank for the release of the funds. This should be ready in two days time and I would be able to obtain the deposit certificate first and foremost.
I was asked to pay the equivalent total sum of US$45,000 to process the documents and I have in fact released $30,000 to ensure that these documents are speedily processed. The attorney will prepare the Will which shall legally put you in place as next of kin; he will obtain the necessary clearances which will cover all the aspects involved in this transaction from the Hong Kong authorities including the Justice department here.
In this light, I have sent you the Contact of the bank so you can make enquires on offshore/on-line account opening. I advice you like I said earlier that you open an account with the bank so that once the funds are released, they will be moved straight into your account and the transfer will not attract the monetary bodies, as the transfer will be seen as in-house. (Same telex type with my Bank). You can then transfer the funds in safe bits to your main account for both of us. I will advise you that you contact the Bank and have an account opened with the bank. Instruct the bank that you want to have an account opened for the purpose of receiving huge amount from your business associate in Hong Kong and pressurize the bank to get back to you on ASAP.
Please find below the contact details of the bank.
Nationwide Finance Group,
28, Breams Garden Rd ,
Contact Person: MacDonald Bienfast
I will await an update. Please do make contact with the bank today so that the account opening can be fast. Let's work together in all honesty and trust and not forgetting the need for confidentiality. Send Me a Copy of the mail you send to the Bank for my reference. As soon as the will is ready I will send you a copy. You would also have to send me a copy of your id.
I await your urgent response,
Mr. Patrick Fong
(OK, so he's going to hit me up for $15K. Let's see.)
Aug 25 2007
I Wait to read from you Ben.
Mr. Patrick Fong
(Bloody hell, can't I get a day off? )
Aug 25 2007
i aksk you befor. why is there the big hurry habibi???? yuo say urgent urgent urgent!!!! your iraqui salmon guy still daed????? the moneys is not to be going anyhwere without my assistence>>>?? as we israelis say ain lecha shum sechel, mevin oti hamudi??? which mean why much of thebig hurry???
it happens that my buss zayin katan he was throwing a partiy sos i cannot email yesdturday. it was a small partiy btu when yuo have zayin katan size is not eveyrthing
as you say BACK TO BSUINISSESS
i will write yuor macdonladnd pereson in htis bank. i am to dealing with many majgor banks in israel and euorpe. i never hear fo nationwise finance gruop... in the ingland. is this a bigbank habibi????
(The Hebrew expression in the first paragraph translates to "You have no sense at all, do you understand me, cutie pie?")
(To stall, I sent this only to Fong's address, not to the bank. Let's see if he notices.)
August 25 2007
dear mcdonlad beenfast
i want to open a bankaccuont in yor bank
i am getting a purpose of receiving huge amount from your business associate in Hong Kong and pressurize the bank to get back to you on ASAP
please act quikcly becuase my bsuinesses associate nto a vrey patetint men you knwo???? i do nto email him for ONE SINGLW DAY adn he to sounding lkie his undrwaeris tooo tighht
pleseto be very quick
ps very uregnt daed peoples might awaked up
August 26 2007
Its good to hear from you. I really want to know more from you. Are you intrested in this Transaction at all,or you are just trying to make a fool of me? I seriously don't understand what you mean by DEAD PEOPLE MIGHT AWAKE. The fact that Salman Jaber is dead doesn't mean the money will be left in the account forever. If the Monetary Bodies of my Bank should find out about these funds, then the money is gone. Please understand the reason why i am so much in a hurry to getting this Money out of my bank.
Nationwide Finance is a private finance company which deals with only selected clients. Its not a Public Bank.
Now the bank should have gotten back to you, please update me about the bank. If you haven't gotten a response please do contact them again.
Mr. Patrick Fong
August 26 2007
mister dear FUng
alwyas a pleazur for to reading yur emails beleive me!!!! my intnesnion is not to makinig you afool. what i am mining is becuase yuo write Due to his untimely death, the funds have been sitting in the account ever since and will continue to do so perpetually unless we do something about it. this is to means to me the monyes isnot leaving anyhwere so wh so uregnt????? my inglish is butter then my tpying adn peptuallly mins forever and forever amen???? nwo yuo say The fact that Salman Jaber is dead doesn't mean the money will be left in the account forever.
so what is nice isareli men to thinking abuot this?
yuo see FUng i went to mak sure with such a big transectitisno of the monyes evrything go to plen
yuo ever was onc eto meetign israelis peoples? we alwyas speka our minds, like we says in hebre w paam frier le'olam frier, sini tipesh!!!! i am very direct men an if i see spmthing thet is not to be mak sense i say somthings.
this naiotnwide finnance - htey open on wikends? we wont hering back frpm them unitl mondya, no?
FUng - alos some good news for me!!!! i winning the lotto totto on wikend - 20000 shekels!!!! i am feeling very lukcy with hte monyes. i hav alredy to spended it on rolex watch i find in moslem quartr in old city jerusleam. men give me special price!!!!! culd you beleive????? btu my eyes are still looking a t the big prizze. i beleve yuo know??????
(20,000 shekels isn't much - probably 2 months wages for the average punter.)
Aug 27 2007
Thanks for your response. I will be waiting to read from you about the Bank.
Mr. Patrick Fong
(Sorry, personal life just got too busy. I'm bowing out.)
August 29, 2007
Mr Patrick Fong, or whoever you are:
I represent Israeli Internal Security. We have been watching your conversation with Mr Zona with interest. There are no emails that come in and out of the Knesset without us knowing about it. What is it exactly you want from him? We know just as much about advance fee fraud as you do. We would advise you to leave him alone.
Are you really in Hong Kong, or are you in Nigeria like all the others?
(And he never wrote back. Fancy that.)